Daverino Mario Doremefasola's "The Pathetic"

One Size Fits All Engagement Ring. Brilliant, Davey, Brilliant! As bright as the Diamond!
Thank you, Pepper, but the brilliance belongs to my best buddy, Brad.

Back in 1980, I went to him, lamenting about my two failed wedding engagements in a span of three years, needing empathy and support.

Brad said, "What you need is a 'one size fits all' engagement ring!"
 

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