Ok Guys, Need some suggestions if you would
- Thread starter IrishEyes
- Start date
CallMeKate
Well-known Member
- Location
- Mid-Atlantic US
Okay, this is very simplistic, but has he kept up with medical appointments, screenings, etc.? It may not be good to assume it's depression or a "just get up and do something" situation. He may realize something isn't right physically and doesn't want to mention it. I wouldn't (personal sharing here only) assume that a shuffling walk all of a sudden is psychosomatic and not a physical issue starting up for him.
I know it is not a physical issue, take him to a casino and he is strutting
CallMeKate
Well-known Member
- Location
- Mid-Atlantic US
Well then so much for THAT theory, eh?!
Aunt Bea
SF VIP
- Location
- Near Mount Pilot
You be you and let him be him, celebrate your differences. 
bobcat
Well-known Member
- Location
- Northern Calif
Get him to watch some YouTube fishing videos. It might reawaken the desire.
OMG!!!! Brilliant!!!!!! I sure won't have to worry about reaching 80 for sure then! That's a 2 fer!
Aha. Add that to Fritz's list suggesting that he might have lost confidence in his ability to handle the boat with ease and I'd say he's just not into boating anymore.
My husband is still very strong but his balance has grown worse in recent years. I know I would worry about him on a boat.
If you want to do something together in the nice weather, you might just suggest the two of you start a walking regimen or take up something like golf.
Could you take the boat out by yourself an get to learn how it operates
and learn about the lake and shores.
Maybe you could take pictures, find nice picnic areas, a good swimming hole,
locate neighbors' houses, etc. You could tell him about the things that you saw,
the things that you liked or didn't like and always tell him that you'd like it all
better if he was with you.
If nothing else, you might end up having a nice day by yourself and be able to
someone you love about your nice day... idk.
Or maybe just sell the boat and try to find something else...
and learn about the lake and shores.
Maybe you could take pictures, find nice picnic areas, a good swimming hole,
locate neighbors' houses, etc. You could tell him about the things that you saw,
the things that you liked or didn't like and always tell him that you'd like it all
better if he was with you.
If nothing else, you might end up having a nice day by yourself and be able to
someone you love about your nice day... idk.
Or maybe just sell the boat and try to find something else...
MACKTEXAS
Well-known Member
If it's okay with you to go to the casino, maybe that's an easier start to break his pattern of sitting at the computer. But if that's not something you want to do, then no.
I sort of hinted to that , told him, you don't seem real keen on the lake fishing any more, do you think we should think about selling the boat? It was a prompt and strong "No"
I will start with the trying the setting up a non-work non game day date and see how that goes. This Monday is the first one I will be able to hit all the requirements for it to be possible with this great weather . Aug 4th... wish me luck. I even bought one of those totes with wheels to pull the battery back to the boat rather than carry it. It weighs 75 lbs or more, so I have been trying to think of everything
gruntlabor
Well-known Member
- Location
- Last Frontier, Age 83
I know you are doing your best for him, Irish Eyes, but he doesn't want to at this time. And your constant reminders are not productive. Support him by giving him the very best nutrition and fresh air and quality sleep. Make him laugh and support him in other ways.
And your constant reminders are not productive.
I mentioned it twice to him once in June and just this last Thursday about putting the battery in to charge in the sun it being solar and probably dead by now. Sorry you thought I was constantly reminding him.
Packerjohn
Packerjohn
- Location
- Canada
I'm from Canada. Here, people starring at screens all day long is a national addiction problem. Even though some might have a million "friends" on Facebook," they cannot communicate face to face. If you say good morning to some men, they drop their heads and stare at their shoes. They can't even mumble a greeting.
hawkdon
Well-known Member
- Location
- Liberty MO
be sure to have two life jackets, put one on yourself and go
to him with the other one!!!
to him with the other one!!!
Disgustedman
Senior Member
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Inactivity is a habit that many fall in to, sadly you cant force him to start moving more. The biggest motivation I have seen in older men is a major health scare, I sure hope it doesn't come to that for your husband.
I wish I had advise for you, but I think you're learning you can't force, beg or bribe him into anything. My only suggestion is to simply do what you want and go out on the boat yourself, maybe one day he follows along.
I wish I had advise for you, but I think you're learning you can't force, beg or bribe him into anything. My only suggestion is to simply do what you want and go out on the boat yourself, maybe one day he follows along.
These days, many people worldwide stare at their phones all day.
Pretty soon, we will all be talking to AI all day.
That's my situation, the weather is beautiful and I can't get myself off the computer. Those YouTube algorithms are eating up all my time (spent all yesterday watching the ones where people buy the unknown contents of a storage room for a little bit of money and then film them going through and finding garbage or treasure).
When you figure out what works for your husband, you might be able to get rich selling your technique to the rest of us computer addicts.
Timewise 60+
Senior Member
Not safe to go out by yourself...I get what they are saying but just like swimming alone, depending on the situation, one in a boat can have little hope if something goes wrong...
gruntlabor
Well-known Member
- Location
- Last Frontier, Age 83
My mistake
if i had a spouse that controlling i'd be kicking them to the curb.
Timewise 60+
Senior Member
I am 73 and my wife and I were married at 19! So, I kind of relate to your husband. I get in a rut (that's what I call it) like that sometimes when my wife wants me to do something.
As I think about what would moves me, I came up with the following to consider. On a warm day get into something sexy (e.g. swimsuit, tight shorts and tight top, etc.). Go into where your husband is and tell him you're going out on the boat and float around to get some sun, have him put some lotion on your back. Don't invite him...unless he asks! Make some noise in the kitchen getting some snacks and maybe a drink in a plastic glass or container. Then go on out and enjoy. Take your time if he doesn't come out this time. Ask a girlfriend next time. If none of that works dump him and call me...
As I think about what would moves me, I came up with the following to consider. On a warm day get into something sexy (e.g. swimsuit, tight shorts and tight top, etc.). Go into where your husband is and tell him you're going out on the boat and float around to get some sun, have him put some lotion on your back. Don't invite him...unless he asks! Make some noise in the kitchen getting some snacks and maybe a drink in a plastic glass or container. Then go on out and enjoy. Take your time if he doesn't come out this time. Ask a girlfriend next time. If none of that works dump him and call me...