This morning my son and I went to our neighbor-friend John's funeral. I'm also friends with his sister Allie, who used to live in our complex. Our children played together but she and I were just good neighbors then. We bonded when she started coming to the senior center I attended. I started to call John two weeks ago on Sunday, but figured he was watching the game.
They were both strongly on my mind over the weekend. Monday I told my BFF I was going to make it a point to call Allie but that night she called me first and told me that John had passed in the hospital on Friday. I was shocked and heartbroken. They were very close and he was a big help to her, so this is going to be rough for her.
John and I bonded after being good neighbors for decades when I told my DIL to add him, Allie and another neighbor, his friend Ty to the list of seniors getting free restaurant meals delivered 5 days a week during COVID (the three of them are blind). The initiative was coordinated by a wonderful young man who's grandfather attended my mother's church. John was so grateful, as were Ty and Allie. John used to get big boxes of produce during the city's free food initiatives. He'd call me to come get some. I told him I didn't bother with fresh produce, so he said, well give what you take to your DIL, who he knew from the school system.
John was a giant with a big heart. He wasn't fat but he was 6'8" tall. As was mentioned several times during the service, he stayed in touch with his family and friends, was a protector and loved helping anyone in need. He also loved fishing and basketball. He'd call me on Valentines Day and Mothers Day and other special days to say Happy (whatever) and sometimes we'd talk for an hour. I didn't cry at the funeral but I knew tears weren't "far". Like all (what I call) "good funerals", which are aka celebrations of life, the stories told about him brought lots of laughter as well as heartfelt moments.
This evening I went over to HS#3's studio for his broadcast, which hit home for us both. It was inspired by a conversation we had earlier in the week about people who are sad (due to loss of a loved one or loved ones), lonely, depressed and /or stressed during the holiday season. He had composed a new song, which normally I would have heard as soon as he finished it (Tuesday), but I heard it for the first time with the rest of his audience, at the end of the show.
It's a beautiful, compelling song that made me think of John. Then I got teary eyed. When HS turned to ask me what I thought of the broadcast, he knew immediately that something was wrong and comforted me. We wound up discussing some heavy topics but as he walked me back to my building, somehow it morphed into anecdotes that made us both laugh. We both that!
I am so blessed. If you could hear any of them talking with me and didn't know better, you'd swear they were my biological children. Honorary Daughter used to call me G-ma (as do her children, my two youngest grandchildren). Now she calls me Mumsy. Her oldest child, who was one when my son met her, calls me MeMa. She stole my heart and earned the title of Honorary Granddaughter when she insisted to clean my patio to perfection years ago when her and HD did that for me. My son considers her his daughter and won't let anyone mess with her. 
We've gone to Amazon Fresh often and sometimes take rides to the mountain. HS #1 invited me to visit him in Tampa after my husband passed. He took me to his favorite semi private beach and to a Jazz club to hear live music. He's been my son's best friend and business partner for decades. And my honorary children love hanging out with me....so cool ! 
BTW...I have more honorary children who adopted me. They are my sons music loving friends. I get called Mom, Mama or Queen by the others.
