Nathan
SF VIP
- Location
- High Desert- Calif.
Was talking with my primary care doctor a few years back, about quality of life issues, I must have mentioned my anxiety & mild depression feelings. He recommended that I read a book called Tiny Habits, by BJ Fogg- a Stanford University Behavioral researcher. I found it on Amazon and purchased the paperback edition. Later I bought the Kindle edition as well. With some simple strategies a person can develop positive habits or un-learn negative behaviors.
Developing the "good" and erasing the "bad" habits gives you a nice feeling of accomplishment, which is empowering and gives you that Dopamine reward that we Humans are always seeking.
Below is an excerpt from my Kindle edition of Tiny Habits:
Introduction Change Can Be Easy (and Fun) Tiny is mighty. At least when it comes to change. Over the last twenty years, I’ve found that most everyone wants to make some kind of change: eat healthier, lose weight, exercise more, reduce stress, get better sleep. We want to be better parents and partners. We want to be more productive and creative. But the alarming levels of obesity, sleeplessness, and stress reported by the media—and seen in my Stanford lab’s research—tell me there is a painful gap between what people want and what they actually do. The disconnect between want and do has been blamed on a lot of things—but people blame it on themselves for the most part.
When it comes to failed attempts at change, we almost never blame the “manufacturer.” We blame ourselves. When our results fall short of our expectations, the inner critic finds an opening and steps on stage. Many of us believe that if we fail to be more productive, lose weight, or exercise regularly then something must be wrong with us. If only we were better people, we wouldn’t have failed. If only we had followed that program to the letter or kept those promises to ourselves, we would have succeeded. We just need to get our act together and pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and do better. Right?
Nope. Sorry. Not right. We are not the problem. Our approach to change is. It’s a design flaw—not a personal flaw. Building habits and creating positive change can be easy—if you have the right approach. A system based on how human psychology really works. A process that makes change easier. Tools that don’t rely on guesswork or faulty principles.
Popular thinking about habit formation and change feeds into our impulse to set unrealistic expectations. We know habits matter; we just need more good habits and fewer bad ones. But here we are, still struggling to change. Still thinking it’s our fault. All my research and hands-on experience tell me that this is exactly the wrong mindset. In order to design successful habits and change your behaviors, you should do three things.
Stop judging yourself. Take your aspirations and break them down into tiny behaviors. Embrace mistakes as discoveries and use them to move forward. This may not feel intuitive. I know it doesn’t come naturally to everyone. Self-criticism is its own kind of habit. For some people, blaming yourself is just where your brain goes—it’s like a sled in the snow, slipping into a well-worn path down the hill. If you follow the Tiny Habits process, you’ll start taking a different route.
Here's an interesting Youtube TEDx talk by BJ Fogg, explaining his behavioral research and his "Tiny Habits" approach:
Developing the "good" and erasing the "bad" habits gives you a nice feeling of accomplishment, which is empowering and gives you that Dopamine reward that we Humans are always seeking.
Below is an excerpt from my Kindle edition of Tiny Habits:
Introduction Change Can Be Easy (and Fun) Tiny is mighty. At least when it comes to change. Over the last twenty years, I’ve found that most everyone wants to make some kind of change: eat healthier, lose weight, exercise more, reduce stress, get better sleep. We want to be better parents and partners. We want to be more productive and creative. But the alarming levels of obesity, sleeplessness, and stress reported by the media—and seen in my Stanford lab’s research—tell me there is a painful gap between what people want and what they actually do. The disconnect between want and do has been blamed on a lot of things—but people blame it on themselves for the most part.
When it comes to failed attempts at change, we almost never blame the “manufacturer.” We blame ourselves. When our results fall short of our expectations, the inner critic finds an opening and steps on stage. Many of us believe that if we fail to be more productive, lose weight, or exercise regularly then something must be wrong with us. If only we were better people, we wouldn’t have failed. If only we had followed that program to the letter or kept those promises to ourselves, we would have succeeded. We just need to get our act together and pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and do better. Right?
Nope. Sorry. Not right. We are not the problem. Our approach to change is. It’s a design flaw—not a personal flaw. Building habits and creating positive change can be easy—if you have the right approach. A system based on how human psychology really works. A process that makes change easier. Tools that don’t rely on guesswork or faulty principles.
Popular thinking about habit formation and change feeds into our impulse to set unrealistic expectations. We know habits matter; we just need more good habits and fewer bad ones. But here we are, still struggling to change. Still thinking it’s our fault. All my research and hands-on experience tell me that this is exactly the wrong mindset. In order to design successful habits and change your behaviors, you should do three things.
Stop judging yourself. Take your aspirations and break them down into tiny behaviors. Embrace mistakes as discoveries and use them to move forward. This may not feel intuitive. I know it doesn’t come naturally to everyone. Self-criticism is its own kind of habit. For some people, blaming yourself is just where your brain goes—it’s like a sled in the snow, slipping into a well-worn path down the hill. If you follow the Tiny Habits process, you’ll start taking a different route.
Here's an interesting Youtube TEDx talk by BJ Fogg, explaining his behavioral research and his "Tiny Habits" approach:
