A Great Loss

Wrigley's

Wrigley's

Member
Backstory first - I came into some money back in '86 and bought this place. There's 6 ground-level adjoining rental units in two rows of three that face a common area (kids play yard, 2 outdoor grills, and the rest is lawn), then the rental office, a maintenance shop and my house are all up at the front.

When I got this place, 3 units were occupied, including the nice lady in 117B. People and families have come and gone, but this lady has been a constant. She was a pain-in-the butt at first, always organizing events; Easter egg hunts, community bbq's, water balloon fights, Halloween costume contests, rummage sales, you name it. At first I got on her case about it (mindful of liabilities) but she did what she wanted anyway. After a couple years I just went with it, and she became my official community organizer and office assistant.

She died last night. She was 92 and was organizing events right up to the end. I'm really torn up about it. So I want to pay a little tribute to Martha, better known as Big Mama. A name that, imo, only referred to the size of her heart.

Rest In Peace, Big Mama. And I promise you, I will color the eggs this year.
 

Thanks BlunderWoman. Never thought I'd take it this hard, but never really thought of her not being here. This place will never be the same.
 

Wrigley's said:
Thanks BlunderWoman. Never thought I'd take it this hard, but never really thought of her not being here. This place will never be the same.
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It's hard to lose people we grow to care about and she was a big part of your life. You saw her all the time. Maybe you could have a memorial for her there with the other residents.
 
Sorry for your loss. I would suggest maybe planting a tree in her honor in the commons area, having a small ceremony where the other renters could tell a story about how she affected their lives. Just a thought. Or maybe you guys could all chip in and buy a small memorial pack to affix to the house(apartment) she rented.
 
It's important to let yourself cry whether you are a man or a woman. I didn't do that once because I was trying to be strong for everyone else. Then a few days passed and I needed to cry badly and I could not. It just sat in my chest like a heavy lump for a year. I think allowing oneself to cry is important.
 
BlunderWoman said:
It's hard to lose people we grow to care about and she was a big part of your life. You saw her all the time. Maybe you could have a memorial for her there with the other residents.
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Already have some volunteers. Everyone here loved her.
 
Gail.S said:
Sorry for your loss. I would suggest maybe planting a tree in her honor in the commons area, having a small ceremony where the other renters could tell a story about how she affected their lives. Just a thought. Or maybe you guys could all chip in and buy a small memorial pack to affix to the house(apartment) she rented.
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Renting that apartment is going to be really hard for me. Think I'll take my time with it. Her kids are here today clearing it out and to clean it. She was so neat and tidy the cleaning won't be as hard as renting it will be.
 
She was more than a foot shorter than me but still pulled me by the ear all the way to the laundry room because I put off fixing one of the washers. It freakin hurt, too!

That was her, just being Big Mama.
 
Wrigley's said:
She was more than a foot shorter than me but still pulled me by the ear all the way to the laundry room because I put off fixing one of the washers. It freakin hurt, too!

That was her, just being Big Mama.
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:) That reminds me of an old lady I knew very gutsy
 
Ameriscot said:
Very sorry for your loss. :(
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Thanks Annie. I'm fine now. Her family gave me a print (poster) of a beach scene before they left. She wanted me to have it they said, because she knows I do a lot of surfing. I hung it in the office.

I don't usually get so emotional. Glad to have known her.
 
It's funny sometimes how we dislike a person at first only to become their ally later down the road. I used to say that these types of people are just misunderstood and when we find out their intentions are honorable and not destructive, well, we end up having a change of heart.

My condolences for your loss.
 
oldman said:
It's funny sometimes how we dislike a person at first only to become their ally later down the road. I used to say that these types of people are just misunderstood and when we find out their intentions are honorable and not destructive, well, we end up having a change of heart.

My condolences for your loss.
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You got it exactly right. I went from looking for a place to hide everytime I'd see her coming, to looking for her if I didn't. Always said what was on her mind, always with only the best intentions.
 
I am so sorry for your loss but your post made me smile a little too. It sounds like you got to know a great person who loved life and did what she could to help others enjoy life too. And at 92 she had a good innings too. I hope she is continuing to organise things wherever she is now. :)
 
ossian said:
I am so sorry for your loss but your post made me smile a little too. It sounds like you got to know a great person who loved life and did what she could to help others enjoy life too. And at 92 she had a good innings too. I hope she is continuing to organise things wherever she is now. :)
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I did, for sure. And believe me, if things in the after-life weren't ship-shape before she got there, they are now! And I'm sure they're all smiling a little too....too.


Ralphy - appreciated.
 
Guitarist said:
I think this would be a great idea.

I am sorry for your loss.
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My office has been full of people who want to do a memorial after tomorrow's egg hunt. There's talk of a balloon release and everybody will tell their favorite Big Mama moment. And they want me to plant a tree but it'll have to be a new fern (no room for another tree) over by a bench in picnic/bbq area. That was her "spot".

Sounds nice, 'ey?
 
BlunderWoman said:
It's hard to lose people we grow to care about and she was a big part of your life. You saw her all the time. Maybe you could have a memorial for her there with the other residents.
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That would be a nice idea.....and Wrigley, it sounds like you aren't the only person who will miss her. Nice to not be 'alone' but sad to be part of a crowd who misses someone special.
 
Debby said:
That would be a nice idea.....and Wrigley, it sounds like you aren't the only person who will miss her. Nice to not be 'alone' but sad to be part of a crowd who misses someone special.
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Don't want to sound cold-hearted but I'll be glad when not everybody is talking about it. We'll have our Easter party tomorrow morning, then the little memorial, and then I hope things calm down after that. Seriously, she wouldn't like all this fuss.
 
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