Age-shaming?

Marie5656

SF VIP
Location
Batavia, NY
A friend posted this on Facebook. I agree with the thought. Instead of embracing out age, we seem to be told we should be embarrassed by it.

15037150_10154110805708581_3616326488960023455_n.jpg
 

Yes, Marie, I agree. I have had a similar problem. I wear hearings aids in both ears and have always worn my hair very short. I don't know how many times people have said to me that I should wear my hair longer and then know one will ever know I have hearing aids. So what!! Am I suppose to be ashamed of this? Sometimes hearing loss comes with age, I'm just grateful there is technology to help me. It really makes me angry. A few times I felt like saying,"hey lady, get out of those skin tight jeans and wipe all that glop off your face,you're almost eighty years old,accept it.'
 
I've kind of learned to embrace the suck of aging...notably needed dental work, gravity, joints like the Tin Man, being on a first name basis with local pharmacy staff...But I don't feel age shamed as much as feeling age invisible. It's as if young people and families dominate the picture and as seniors we're just chugging around the edges.
 

I don't have a problem with getting old or the changes in my appearance.

Most of the time when I'm out running errands I feel almost invisible, people don't seem to notice me.

No telling what I could get away with in this disguise LOL!!!
 
Yes, Seabreeze, that is all so true. I think often of a friend that passed a couple years ago after spending many years in a wheelchair paralyzed from the waist down. Growing old is a privilege not everyone will enjoy.
 
Most of the time when I'm out running errands I feel almost invisible, people don't seem to notice me.

Kind of useful sometimes, I've been in some pretty rough areas even late night. I don't look worth robbing, I'm not young and sexy, I don't want to buy any recreational chemicals...I am invisible. But you know if I had a sudden problem those bangers on the corner might be the first to leap to my defense. Age has it's benefits.
 
I have found that when I use my cane people extend courtesies that I didn't receive before.

There is a reason that I look like I do, but I am still going when some others I have known are not.

The metal joints in my knees never hurt and they don't squeak.
 
I'm not a fan of aging because I don't feel as well as I did when I was younger and have to invest lots of time exercising, etc. just to keep on keeping on. In the morning, I can't open a jar to save my life. It's something I have to plan out ahead of time so I won't have to do that and it's restricting.

It's hard to celebrate something when it leaves you in pain. Just IMHO.
 
I'm with you chic. Aging beats the alternative, but it's still lots of pain. Wouldn't it be nice if when we retired we'dstop aging? We'll back to reality because that's not gonna happen.
 
I have always been physically active above the pack...but it embarrasses me sometimes now. If I sit or stand too long my ankle goes wonky, my back too. But I know if I walk around for a bit everything will loosen up again. But for a few minutes I look like I'm really hurtin' and I am. I'm only 54...so it's downhill from here????
 
I'm not a fan of aging because I don't feel as well as I did when I was younger and have to invest lots of time exercising, etc. just to keep on keeping on. In the morning, I can't open a jar to save my life. It's something I have to plan out ahead of time so I won't have to do that and it's restricting.

It's hard to celebrate something when it leaves you in pain. Just IMHO.

Yes, exercise takes a small chunk out of my day too, probably a couple hrs. but I have to also, it's not optional. As long as I can keep going, I guess I can't complain too much. Don't you have any of those rubber thingies to open jars? My fingers are weak for whatever reason, so when something requires using them I have to be creative. I should exercise my hands too, I'm sure that would help.
 
When I was young and thought about way down the road when I would be old I always thought if I could keep my eyesight and my hands I would cope. I have a high pain level most days and another couple of "owies" that I would rather not have and that wheelchair is on the horizon but my eyesight is great, I do a lot of miniature work and for that I wear readers but for everyday I don't need any specs at all. My hands are as good as they always were, no pain I them at all so I can still do all the craft things I have ever done. I consider myself very fortunate because of this. If I end up in the chair it won't stop me doing most things, except walking.


I haven't worn make up for years. as a teenager maybe, my hair is very long as it always has been but it is put up everyday just as it always was.


I can talk about when I have gone etc without a care although other people often say "don't talk like that". Aging and death are a natural thing, I find it pretty basic. Somewhat like a plant , it starts small, it matures and bears fruit,. then it may stays green for quite a long time, but then very gradually it starts to fade then drop it's leaves, bit by bit the plant loses it's strength and it's foliage and one day it is done. Well my main stem is a bit weak,my foliage has changed color a tiny bit and I have certainly dropped a few leaves but there are plenty still there, one day I will be ready for the compost pile but not today.


Funny thing I always wanted silver hair and mine is still dark although not as red as it used to be. I guess you can't have everything you wanted in old age.


The one thing that has irritated me though is the way folks react if you are in a wheelchair. I have been a couple of times over the years and I find many people talk only to the person pushing it . I remember being in a fabric shop some years ago. I had torn the calf muscle in my leg and couldn't weight bear , I needed to shop and took a chair. In the store the assistant asked my husband what I was making and he said he wasn't sure as I was always making something, she replied,"yes it is good if THEY keep busy isn't it" . I felt myself bristle and I could have said something but instead I chose to give her a toothy grin and a nodding head whilst making a few "not quite there" cooing noises, the assistant responded with an sweet aaah. We then left the store absolutely screaming with laughter while the assistant looked on with a very odd look on her face. I am bad sometimes!!

For as long of us still have a good few leaves lest we are doing OK.


XX Jeannine
 


Back
Top