Do You Have A Friend Of The Opposite Sex

JimW said:
Having different points of view and being respectful in voicing them is one thing, being judgemental to the point of being insulting is another.
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Well, one person's idea of being insulted is another person's idea of "I'm just stating what I think". Someone, where we live, thought I had insulted my wife by something I said about her. The person looked at me and said "that wasn't very nice towards your wife" and, believe or not, both wife and I started laughing. My wife looked at the person and said "you don't know my husband like I do. He wasn't insulting me at all. He was just stating a fact and said it pretty funny".

Later, she looked at me in our apartment and said, "some people. They just don't have the humor or understanding like we do". She was completely right. My wife doesn't "judge" people and things as much as I do, but she does do it.
 

Victor said:
Charles Bronson is not homely IMO. Not at all. Woody Allen looks homely.

I think we all agree chemistry is crucial and that explains why people with seemingly
nothing in common and opposing types are couples. The rest is physical.
Then again, suppose you met a poor man with much chemistry for you. If he has no ambition or a lousy job
that would change your mind/

As we (or at least me) become seniors, our chemistry dissipates.
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Woody Allen is ugly, and so are Howard Stern and Mick Jagger. I have no chemistry and also no respect for them. I had respect AND chemistry with Bronson. For a long term relationship I would have to have chemistry AND respect AND at least some compatibility. I disagree, I think chemistry lives on into old age if the respect is still there and we still get along. And if he had no ambition but I had chemistry, I would have a wild love affair and then dump him. I am not high maintenance, but I would never want to live paychek-to-paycheck either or have to carry all the responsibility of making a living for the both of us. I happen to be ambitious to get ahead and not live in poverty. All women are different and all men are different, they each have their limits and deal breakers. There are women and men who don't mind being a doormat to their partners or are willing to put up with a miserable relationship so as to avoid divorce. I have known lots of couples like that.
 
PVC said:
Woody Allen is ugly, and so are Howard Stern and Mick Jagger. I have no chemistry and also no respect for them. I had respect AND chemistry with Bronson. For a long term relationship I would have to have chemistry AND respect AND at least some compatibility. I disagree, I think chemistry lives on into old age if the respect is still there and we still get along. And if he had no ambition but I had chemistry, I would have a wild love affair and then dump him. I am not high maintenance, but I would never want to live paychek-to-paycheck either or have to carry all the responsibility of making a living for the both of us. I happen to be ambitious to get ahead and not live in poverty. All women are different and all men are different, they each have their limits and deal breakers. There are women and men who don't mind being a doormat to their partners or are willing to put up with a miserable relationship so as to avoid divorce. I have known lots of couples like that.
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Well, even though I get a fairly small SS Retirement each month (less than $1k), my wife is the main "money maker" on her Mon thru Fri. job. I compensate by taking care of our apartment, doing laundry and most of the cooking as well as running a few errands during the week. She has told me many times, "I don't know what I do if you weren't home doing these things. I know I couldn't do this stuff after working a full 8 hours."

One thing for sure, she has definitely had a much, much better time getting jobs than I did. She has the college degrees that I don't. I wouldn't even compare my resume' to hers.
 

ClassicRockr said:
Well, even though I get a fairly small SS Retirement each month (less than $1k), my wife is the main "money maker" on her Mon thru Fri. job. I compensate by taking care of our apartment, doing laundry and most of the cooking as well as running a few errands during the week. She has told me many times, "I don't know what I do if you weren't home doing these things. I know I couldn't do this stuff after working a full 8 hours."

One thing for sure, she has definitely had a much, much better time getting jobs than I did. She has the college degrees that I don't. I wouldn't even compare my resume' to hers.
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That is fine. You try to help any way you can. You don't sleep all day or lay on the couch, and expect her to come home and do everything and wait on you after working at a job. My father was a typical old world Italian. Here in the US he had a full time job and so did my mother, yet after work he would sit and bark orders at my mother, he wouldn't even get up to get the salt shaker. I was livid but figured if my mother let him get away with it, it was her life to do as she pleased. We each have our limits.
 
ClassicRockr said:
That did, sort of, happened to me once years ago, way before meeting my wife. There was a lady at a local nightclub that I was very interested in asking her out. She was definitely good looking, actually TOO good looking for me. I was just about to ask her out and she turned to me and said "Don't even ask, because I will say no. I definitely know you can't afford me". Where some would find that rude of her to say, I really, really appreciated her saying that. She told me the truth............I really, really couldn't afford her! I had a $10 per hour job as a Stockroom Supervisor, temporarily living in a weekly motel room and driving an old truck.
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:lofl:
PVC said:
Woody Allen is ugly, and so are Howard Stern and Mick Jagger. I have no chemistry and also no respect for them. I had respect AND chemistry with Bronson. For a long term relationship I would have to have chemistry AND respect AND at least some compatibility. I disagree, I think chemistry lives on into old age if the respect is still there and we still get along. And if he had no ambition but I had chemistry, I would have a wild love affair and then dump him. I am not high maintenance, but I would never want to live paychek-to-paycheck either or have to carry all the responsibility of making a living for the both of us. I happen to be ambitious to get ahead and not live in poverty. All women are different and all men are different, they each have their limits and deal breakers. There are women and men who don't mind being a doormat to their partners or are willing to put up with a miserable relationship so as to avoid divorce. I have known lots of couples like that.
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If he had no ambition I’d have to have a wild love affair and then dump him?
Thats being brutally honest but you have a very good point. Many couples stay together miserable because they want to avoid divorce. So very true. Some things are deal breakers but once you’re married, you made a commitment for better or worst so It’s not as easy or as cut and dry. Plus it goes both ways. I sure wouldn’t want to be cheated on but nor have I ever cheated.

p.s. Those three don’t do anything for me either. lol
 
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