“I’m just being honest”

Sassycakes said:
I once was asked by a neighbor of mine what I thought of her hairstyle. She said her friend had told her she looked awful. I myself wasn't crazy about her hairstyle but I said "The only thing that matters is how you feel about it,no one else's feeling about it matters." I think everyone should make their own choice.
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When it comes to matters of 'taste', 'style'--that's both honest and kind. For someone to ask how you feel about something that personal (their hairstyle, clothes) they likely have some insecurity about it, and often because someone else has been blunt in their disapproval. Your response, IMO, was perfect, and it doesn't surprise me at all that you would respond that way.
 

feywon said:
He may have been overstating, tho some people are so willfully ignorant that using euphemisms and PC language, one might manage it.

There are definitely phrases that are ambiguous that can be used to close out an unpleasant conversations.

"Bless your heart" can be sincere or can be 'you are a special kind of fool aren't you?' Southerners can tell by tone which is meant.
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I like that quote..whether it was Churchill who said it or not. :p
 

feywon said:
Me, too. My first hubby gave me all kinds of a grief about speaking in normal sentences to our boys, saying "They can't understand that." i asked him how he supposed children learned language, and please tell me at what magical age will they wake up understanding and speaking if no-one has talked to them except in 'baby talk' ("Who's my wittle sweetums?") ? That got him to back off.

There's nothing wrong with using terms of endearment or telling your kids why and how much you love them, but doing it in normal language is better for their language skills. Tho it can have unintended consequences: My daughter, having her older brothers as well as me talking to her in normal language, had quite an advanced vocabulary by time she entered Kindergarten. She also had a speech impediment--imagine my surprise when the school's speech therapist explained that it was because certain words were so far beyond the norm for her age level that her tongue and mouth had yet developed the dexterity to say them 'properly'. She could say them well enough to be understood and the therapist was impressed that she actually understood the meaning of the words she was using.
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If you don't make your own mind up as to the way you speak to your child then its not possible to relate properly to them in my humble opinion.
 
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