A dilemma this Christmas, (we all like musing on these don't we)

grahamg

Old codger
I'm trying to decide whether to hand over directly an unexpected find of a piece of schoolwork over to a sister of mine this Christmas, or pass it via a third party.

Somehow it had been stuck in a box containing my own school work and my brothers, and no one noticed who it belonged to till now.

I'm not really estranged from this sister, though we haven't met for a few years, (her husband seemingly a bit hostile when ignoring me outside a store a couple of years back though, even though we've never fallen out to my knowledge).

Not much of a dilemma, (pretty trivial really), and my instinct is to hand it via a third party, and leave it at that, (a mutual friend and his wife being a very good friend of this sister and her husband).

The piece of homework btw is quite an impressive item in my view, with very neat handwriting, and I'm sure her children would be amused to see their mums school work, (a project on the subject of "Evolution" :) ).

There we are, a trivial thread, about a trivial dilemma, (can you think of any similarly trivial matters you've toyed with concerning "whatever"?)!
 

The principal of elementary school in our village came to me one day while I was working at the library. He showed me a piece of paper he had just run across in his own old paperwork (he's retired), and offered it up to me.
My daughter was 10 years old at the time she sent this note to her principal. She had drawn "Superman" complete with a cape, and told him he was her hero. No explanation on the note why, but obviously she wanted him to know he was admired. It was so cute to see after all those years. She was 35 when I gave it back to her. She was delighted to have it.

My advice to you is to give it to your sister. I'll bet both she and her children will treasure it.
 

Not much of a dilemma, (pretty trivial really), and my instinct is to hand it via a third party, and leave it at that, (a mutual friend and his wife being a very good friend of this sister and her husband).

Go with your instincts. Why try to establish contact in a nice way?
 
I find it "amazing" you kept your schoolwork.
Its an amazing discovery not least because of where it was found, in an old farm barn with a slightly leaky roof, (but saved by being in an oak wardrobe that had been turned on its side, and the lid/door fitted so tightly no insects or moisture seemed to get in).

As I recall my mother told my brother and I to move the schoolwork and wardrobe out of the house, and I'd just put a loft in the barn to help keep the pigs held below a little warmer in winter.

I'd completely forgotten about the storing of these items, and only looked in the wardrobe to check what was in there, (everything else on the loft being rusted and damaged), expecting everything to be ruined anyway.

An even more remarkable find is my mothers schoolbooks from the 1930s, found in another barn where my sisters had placed them I think, though this barn was at least dry, the very lucky bit being I bothered to look in the case they were in amongst a load of rubbishy old books.

Once I'd found all this, and the fact they'd survived against the odds, you do like looking back at the work put in, and what it tells you about my mother as a scholar, with the most beautiful handwriting, and you do feel custodians of the schoolbooks somehow. My fathers schoolbooks, who wasn't such a scholar because he was more interested in his farming, didn't survive, but I'd have liked to see them.
 
Since you aren't entirely comfortable with dealing with her directly, by all means use the third party (if they are willing).
Her husbands behaviour by ignoring me, when it would have been easier not to, has put me off delivering the schoolwork directly, (though I may yet decide to do so).
The third party would definitely be willing, (and maybe he comes along to the bar I visit on a Monday and asks how I am as a way of keeping her up to date).
 
Not much of a dilemma, (pretty trivial really), and my instinct is to hand it via a third party, and leave it at that, (a mutual friend and his wife being a very good friend of this sister and her husband).
Go with your instincts. Why try to establish contact in a nice way?
I think you're right, and I will go with my instincts as you say. :)
 
Get it to her somehow. Maybe face to face might warm your relationship a little, but if you believe you should go through a third party do that.

When my mother died I found a lot of things that seemed to me would be more appreciated by the descendants of her bother and sister than us. Things like my aunt's grade school report cards, and letters from the 40s. I made a point of getting them to people, mostly in person. All were appreciated.
 

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