Pretty sure whatever that kid is eating will look pretty much the same same coming out as it did going in.
You laugh, but when I worked in Lexington, KY, there was a bagel shop that had a topping option of cream cheese with maple syrup and bourbon and it was Delish! So not really that far-fetched
I'm way past PMS but will take an order of that. On second thought, make it a double.
I do this too, sometimes!