Tish
SF VIP
- Location
- Rural N.S.W. Australia
HIPAA - protects patient's privacy as well as a slew of other things.Unfortunately, as best I know, this confidentiality blockade of location information applies throughout both the U.S. and Canada - it's not related to family at all. Family wishes would come into effect if I were to find exactly where she is.
There are lots of reasons why they will not and cannot acknowledge if a patient/resident is there. Especially important these days. Process servers, people with guns or knives or other weapons.The missing piece of this puzzle is, as I see it, why can't there be a procedure where a nursing home would acknowledge the resident is there, and would accept written communications to be given to the resident. The resident (or family if mentally incapable) would then decide whether to reply or not.
Try writing to the directors of facilities you think where she might be. Explain what you explain here & include a self addressed envelope asking that they would be kind enough to answer one way or the other.My friend was unmarried and lived alone pretty well for most of her adult life. There was no question of abuse that I ever heard about.
Unfortunately, as best I know, this confidentiality blockade of location information applies throughout both the U.S. and Canada - it's not related to family at all. Family wishes would come into effect if I were to find exactly where she is.
The missing piece of this puzzle is, as I see it, why can't there be a procedure where a nursing home would acknowledge the resident is there, and would accept written communications to be given to the resident. The resident (or family if mentally incapable) would then decide whether to reply or not.
I don't see that as a threat or undue burden on staff, (but then hey, I'm not in charge either!)
People have names on mailboxes, and car licence plates showing, so I don't see why knowing where they reside has caused serious danger to the vast majority of people.
Eleanor White
Great thought, however, the recorded message from at least the two nursing homes in Alice TX says they won't give out the names of any staff members either.Try writing to the directors of facilities you think where she might be. Explain what you explain here & include a self addressed envelope asking that they would be kind enough to answer one way or the other.
She is alive and has the right to be contacted by her friends. I'm not going to do anything illegal, but I don't consider trying to locate her as obsessed.At this point, I would give up on trying to ferret out information about your friend and just hope that she is being taken care of as well as possible. There's only so much you can do without becoming obsessed with this issue, and being annoying rather than helpful.
You do realize that her being cared for due to Alzheimer's that even if you managed to establish her whereabouts she most likely wouldn't have a clue who you are. Unless of course you managed to make contact during one of her lucid moments.She is alive and has the right to be contacted by her friends. I'm not going to do anything illegal, but I don't consider trying to locate her as obsessed.
Eleanor White
No, I only got lucky on my friend that 'disappeared' when her niece was going through her aunt's saved correspondence and sent a message to everyone who she could tell was a friend, the info that her aunt had gone into a memory care facility. The niece included the address and I sent my friend a card/letter, but I didn't get a reply and my life got busy and now it has been so many years and I don't even know if she is still alive.My question is, are there any members of this forum who have faced this issue before, and if yes, were you able to solve the problem and find contact information for your "incarcerated" friend or family member?
I do realize that, and I also realize that severity of symptoms can vary. I don't think she would mind if I made an attempt to communicate.You do realize that her being cared for due to Alzheimer's that even if you managed to establish her whereabouts she most likely wouldn't have a clue who you are. Unless of course you managed to make contact during one of her lucid moments.
Alzheimer's is a cruel disease of the mind that leaves a person unable to care for themselves. So if your friend is being cared for that is the best you or anyone could hope for. We cared for my mother in law for years, it was almost comical at times when she had lucid moments of recognition. Then is an instant she was gone again.
Thanks ... I don't see how it would hurt to try.A good friend of mine was in a memory care nursing facility and when her friends on another state called and asked for her they put her on the phone. She had dementia.
Got it.If your friend is in a nursing home with dementia, there's a good chance she may not remember you. Medical confidentiality laws do exist for a reason. Would you want your nosy neighbor to call your doctor to see what's really wrong with you?
Residents in nursing homes can have phones, computers and get mail, but, of course, that's only if they are mentally able.
I think if your friend has severe dementia/Alzheimer's Disease, she may not be able to communicate with anyone and may not even know who you are or who she is. It's nice that you're a caring friend, but realistically in these cases, the family has access to the patient and makes decisions for them. Sorry this happened, but calling it incarceration is overreacting, IMO. Trying to contact a family member is your best bet to find out how your friend is doing.Hi all -
I hope this issue isn't too "heavy" for this forum section, but I tend to think there must be others faced with the same issue.
I have a close friend of about a quarter century who rather suddenly dropped off the radar screen about a year ago. (Meaning, two P.O. boxes shut down, four email addresses shut down, two telephone numbers shut down (she worked from home.) Paper mail rejected but her home was/is still on the tax rolls in her name.) Her place is in Round Rock, Texas.
I had a couple of phone numbers of family members and associates, but all their phone numbers are no longer in service.
I'm up here in the Canadian north woods, retired, in somewhat shaky health, unable to afford to travel or hire a detective.
After a session with (an amazing) psychic, and a friend who was able to get the Round Rock, TX police missing persons bureau to look into my friend's status, we determined that she is in a care facility in Alice, Texas, a couple of hundred miles south, and is suffering from dementia.
The Round Rock police said they were not allowed to furnish more detail.
Now what this means in realistic terms is, I am probably cut off from any communications with my "incarcerated" friend for the rest of her life.
This is due to the medical confidentiality laws.
I have tried calling the nursing homes in the Alice, Texas area, asking for my friend by name in hopes a receptionist might slip up and confirm my friend's presence and let me contact her, with no luck. This is commonly-given advice.
My question is, are there any members of this forum who have faced this issue before, and if yes, were you able to solve the problem and find contact information for your "incarcerated" friend or family member?
Another question is, this seems like rather extreme punishment for both people who are put into nursing home care and friends who want to contact them. Didn't anyone framing confidentiality laws think about this? Are there any organizations working on a solution?
Thanks for taking time to read this,
Eleanor White
Ontario, Canada
I'd gladly contact a family member, but due to the huge geographic distance, I never had full contact info for the family. I had a couple of phone numbers but they have long since gone out of service.I think if your friend has severe dementia/Alzheimer's Disease, she may not be able to communicate with anyone and may not even know who you are or who she is. It's nice that you're a caring friend, but realistically in these cases, the family has access to the patient and makes decisions for them. Sorry this happened, but calling it incarceration is overreacting, IMO. Trying to contact a family member is your best bet to find out how your friend is doing.