A what would you do topic?

LadyEmeraude

Senior Member
Ok, so a friend gives you a gift for your birthday. Unfortunately, it is a type of perfume you are extremely allergic to. Would you say something and ask for a receipt to return it, or keep quiet?
 

If it was a good friend, I would thank her for her thoughtfulness, then tell her I can't wear it. Hopefully she would suggest I exchange it and offer the receipt. Just a regular friend wouldn't know which scent I usually wear, so why would she be guessing about fragrances? She shouldn't be offended.
 

It really depends on the friendship. One Christmas, my boyfriend gave me cheap earrings that I couldn't wear (I can only wear silver or gold). I said they were beautiful but I was afraid I couldn't wear them. He said it was horrible of me to say so.

I certainly wouldn't ask for the receipt. Too mercenary. I'd most likely do this:

I would probably say nothing and pass it on to someone who could use it. If asked about it I would explain it was something I could not wear.
 
For 20 years, my grandmother (my Dad's mother-in-law) bought him chocolate turtles every year for his birthday because she mistakenly thought he loved them. Dad never said a thing but 'thank you so much' each year. He couldn't stand them. No joke...this went on for 2 decades as Dad didn't have the heart to tell Nanny he didn't fancy chocolate.
 
One should honor the giver, but not necessarily the gift. As they say, ā€œit’s the thought that counts.ā€ The course of action depends on your relationship with the giver, and how ego-invested they are with the gift. If you’re fortunate, they will include a store receipt with the unwanted or inappropriate gift, together with reassurances that you can return or exchange it. Failing in that, there’s always re-gifting or giving it to some charitable cause…
 
In almost every case where I give gifts outside of my immediate family I include a gift receipt and emphasize (phrased politely of course) that they are free to return or exchange it for something more to their liking.

Within my family circle, it’s always completely understood that any gift I give is to be returned immediately if it’s not right with no offense taken. They are well aware how much I dislike giving gifts that aren’t needed or used.

My family were raised this way, so they take no offense if I occasionally find a gift not to my liking. Honestly though it seldom happens that any of us receive a gift we can’t use because we also exchange wishlists for Xmas and birthdays to make sure the gifts are needed and wanted.

If someone I don’t know as well gifts me something I can’t use, I accept it gracefully and then either quietly return it or re-gift it. More and more often though it comes with a gift receipt so the choice to return or exchange it is tacitly understood anyway.
 
For 20 years, my grandmother (my Dad's mother-in-law) bought him chocolate turtles every year for his birthday because she mistakenly thought he loved them. Dad never said a thing but 'thank you so much' each year. He couldn't stand them. No joke...this went on for 2 decades as Dad didn't have the heart to tell Nanny he didn't fancy chocolate.
are you talking about the pecan turtles Beezer ?
Ohh i just love those........My friend always sent me some for xmas from canada ....
but sadly he died a few years back...and cant get those over here ,
but they are so yummy !!!!
 
Ok, so a friend gives you a gift for your birthday. Unfortunately, it is a type of perfume you are extremely allergic to. Would you say something and ask for a receipt to return it, or keep quiet?
Definitely keep quiet. I always thank people for a gift, as the thought is what counts. If it is unsuitable for me then I quietly give it away to someone else - but always note who gave it to you!
 
I'd start a big fight. I'd say "Oh, perfume, hey? Trying to tell me I stink, hey? Lookin' for a fight, hey? Well, you've got one. Put 'em up." I'd say........

Actually, I'd quietly re-gift, unless it was a very close friend who spent a lot. Then I would ask, with many apologies, to return it for another scent.
 
Ok, so a friend gives you a gift for your birthday. Unfortunately, it is a type of perfume you are extremely allergic to. Would you say something and ask for a receipt to return it, or keep quiet?
Considering that these days only close friends give each other birthday gifts, I would absolutely say to my friend that I was allergic to the perfume and would give it back to her with a sincere thanks for thinking of me. Wouldn't request a receipt or replacement, nor would I keep quiet about it.

If I gave a friend a nice gift and later happened to learn that the recipient was allergic to it, my feelings would be hurt that my friend didn't think our relationship could bear the strain of a low level of forthrightness. (Are we such delicate flowers that we can't be honest about allergies???)

Hostess gifts like perfumed candles from friends who aren't close buddies would be an exception. Those I donate.
 
After our parents passed away, my sister, brother and I decided NOT to exchange gifts.

For my daughter & sons, they each get a cheque in July to cover birthdays and Christmas for the year. They are free to split the cheques for each family member or put the money towards a trip or a new ??? for the family to enjoy.

I tell my daughter & sons NOT to buy me anything as after I die, the gifts will be returned to the recipient. (as stated in my Will. LOLOL) I rather they spend their money on a trip home (sons live in the UK, daughter lives 30 miles away)
 
With me, it's the opposite. I send cards and gifts to my friends and relatives overseas. Money I can't afford to waste, but I do it as a generous spirit and longtime friendship.

Most time, I'm the one having to ask if they've received it and definitely never get anything in return. So, I gave up... My last attempt was an electronic card, it wasn't even picked up. Very 😢😢😢
 


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