ALIMONY--------Have you paid it or received it? What are your thoughts about it.

L

Lon

Well-known Member
Location
Central California
I ask because last night I visited with a woman that lives in our complex and is suing her separated spouse for past and present alimony. When she told me what her monthly income was and the huge income and assets of her spouse I was amazed that she could afford living where I live. She is 70 and has health problems. She is a nice woman and I hope she is successful with her suit.
 

Been divorced 3 times, never paid or received alimony.

My thoughts? If one of the former lovebirds is substantially better off financially, they get to "share the wealth" with their former spouse.

The arrangement is usually a set time period, or ends upon the remarriage of the former spouse(the recipient).

I think my step daughter is getting a portion of her ex's retirement pension, permanently. They were married over 15 years.
 
Never paid it, never received it!

If she negotiated a settlement that included alimony then she certainly should sue to get what she is entitled to under the terms of the agreement!

Zsa Zsa Gabor - "I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house."
 

tnthomas said:
Been divorced 3 times, never paid or received alimony.

My thoughts? If one of the former lovebirds is substantially better off financially, they get to "share the wealth" with their former spouse.

The arrangement is usually a set time period, or ends upon the remarriage of the former spouse(the recipient).

I think my step daughter is getting a portion of her ex's retirement pension, permanently. They were married over 15 years.
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I divorced my ex 5 years after our marriage. At the time I knew nothing about alimony. The reason for it seemed strange to me later when I found out about it, since I was employed at the time. I received none. (Ex earned a higher pay than I) I was just desperate to get that man out of my life. Alimony was not brought up to me by my divorce lawyer.
 
Never paid nor asked for it. Not my style. Tried getting child support but ex lived in one county, worked in another and had a post office box in another one. Enforcing child support orders is on the bottom of law enforcement's agenda or it was in the 60's. They told me so and my brother who is a deputy confirmed. Ex was manic depressive and would not take meds because he did not feel like himself on them. Off them he was combative and violent. I figured my kids were better off with me working 3 jobs than wasting money chasing him. He lost his jobs and later died of throat cancer after smoking 3 packs of cigs a day. We made it. One daughter is a pharmacist and the other a teacher. Hard years but we made it.
 
Lon said:
Are you sure? Spousal Support and Alimony are the same thing and you are saying spousal support is exceptional?
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Yes, here it is. I live in a community property state. Alimony or spousal support are not awarded except for a brief time or in exceptional circumstances. We do have child support, though, based on a table developed by the courts.
 
It is a long time ago now thank goodness, but my first marriage was an utter disaster and lasted only two years - long story. Unfortunately a child was born during that time. My ex went to live with her mother and didn't work a day for the next 16 years. I supported my son and subsidised my ex for all those years and though of course I accepted responsibility for the boy I resented every penny that went to her. It soured things to the point where I stopped contact with my son for several years.

Thankfully my son and I patched things up later. His mother died at 53 - a lifelong heavy smoker. Now we get on well.

I still remember the sense of financial liberation I felt when the last payment was made!
 

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