Anyone estranged from siblings?

My sister and her family estranged themselves after our mother died, for 20 years. For the last 10 years of that she had Alzheimer's. I of course, did not know. I learned after she died 6/23. It was very hard on me, I was hurt a great deal over our estrangement. Knowing she had Alzheimer's for so long put things more in perspective.
 

Lost contact with brother & youngest sister a few years back. Family/Business problems. I tended father in his waning years until his passing then nothing. Never attended mother's funeral or was listed along with with oldest sister on mother's obit. Youngest & middle sisters passed a few years back, still get an Xmas card from Y's son. Nothing more, no contact from either side. There were 5 siblings now only 3.
 
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My late sister was only four years older than me. We always had a 'strained' relationship. But as adults we both tried to be nice to each other and enjoyed some time together. As children she physically & verbally picked on me until I grew bigger than her, around 13, as I recall. Now that she is gone, I wish we had gotten along better. She had a nice side to her, but when we were young, she was mean. That eventually damaged our relationship when we grew up, although we both tried to work through it.
 

My siblings and I have never been close, just the way we were raised. I haven't spoke with one brother in 25 years, no drama he just stopped communicating.

I have another who hasn't spoken to me in several years, he told me niece I wouldn't tell him who my cell phone provider was so he's done with me. Isn't that the most rediculas thing ever? As if my cell provider is some high level secret I need to protect with my life! I think he confuses imagination with reality.

By the way, my cell provider is Spectrum. Now everyone in the world knows except my brother, man is he going to be pissed.
 
No estrangement from my one blood sibling. Certain topics cannot be discussed - anything related to religion. He has been in a religious cult for the last 45 years and he’s very defensive about it. Best leave that topic alone.
The rest of my family (except my kids) are either the far-left or far-right. They have no time for an apolitical centrist like me. It’s a real shame. It’s like - either you’re on my team or you’re the enemy. What a waste. Life is not a football league for crying out loud.
 
When I was a kid, my Dad had a National ValPro 88 guitar, a very strange and now very rare guitar.

national-1961-valpro-88.png


My Dad always told me "When I'm too old to lift this guitar, it will be yours." He passed away in 1982, and my sister took possession of everything in his house, all of his tools (he was a jack of all trades, including being an excellent carpenter, electrician, etc.) and my other sister let that happen because she had just got married the year before and had a baby on the way, and my brother was off in space somewhere.

Naturally she didn't even call me to say Dad died. In 1983 I popped in at Christmas and when I heard about all this, I asked her "Where is Dad's guitar?" Her reply... "I don't know." I couldn't use any of his tools as I only have basic carpentry skills and know enough about electricity to hot rod guitars but that was about it. But I wanted Dad's guitar.

Later, her son told me she had pawned it for $100, then never went back for it. He tried to get it for me but was too late, the owner of the pawn shop knew what it was worth and had a buyer lined up for the day he could legally sell it. I didn't say a word to her. I knew that if I did, I would probably go ballistic on her, so I just went home and skipped Christmas with my family.

The place I copied that picture from has that particular guitar for sale for $2,500. But I've seen them listed on the same website for $10,000 before...
 
The Kids visit some but mostly we visit them. My brother lives in Arizona.
My sister lives in Key Biscayne. We get along. I don't fly. I knew my way
around Ohare when in my 20's. S.C., Florida, Arizona, to far away now.
Couple hundred miles now is enough. We all meet up at the Zoo every
few years for an afternoon. Like the Dinosaur display. Pandemic wrecked
those plans too.
 
I am no longer in touch with my sister. We are very different people, live very different lives on different continents. We never were close. Growing up I always admired her however, she had a way to hurt my feelings and she loved to push me down. Her constant insults, critics and mockeries got to me.
I decided to cut the contact. I do not regret it.
 
I feel very bad about being estranged from my sisters. I don’t want to be estranged but apparently they did. I feel very hurt that they would cut me out of my parent’s will and very angry that the will was what my parents wanted. They went against their wishes.

I don’t care at all about the money. I miss my sisters and what happened has affected me terribly. I had no idea that they felt that way about me.
We weren’t close but we got along fine. I never took it personally that they weren’t close to me. They are a year apart in age. My younger sister skipped a grade in school, so they were in the same grade. They shared the same school friends. They shared a bedroom at home. I had my own. They even went to college together and shared their books. I always assumed that their closeness was just a matter of circumstance.
It was shocking to me when they cut me out of the will. The hurt it caused me is like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I don’t understand why it all happened and I guess I never will.
 
MaidMarian said:
The hurt it caused me is like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I don’t understand why it all happened and I guess I never will.
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Money can cause people to act terribly. Two families I have known for many years splintered apart after the parents died, all because of who got what. I always admired the closeness the siblings had, looked at them as shining examples of how families should be, now they're broken.
 
I live in a small gated community and in roughly 6 years being here know pretty much everyone which is rare in Miami , you would all be shocked how many people do not have anything to do with other family members from siblings , kids , parents .

I have 2 married daughters who live in Ca but yes I prefer they did not visit often as they ruin my schedule of not doing much of anything but they do not know that , lol .

I do call them or vice versa every few days .

I am divorced but we once in a blue moon email due to daughters .

My father was Sicilian m my mother was Cuban and both sides of family hated the other so it caused some difficulties
 
NotCompSavvy said:
I live in a small gated community and in roughly 6 years being here know pretty much everyone which is rare in Miami , you would all be shocked how many people do not have anything to do with other family members from siblings , kids , parents .

I have 2 married daughters who live in Ca but yes I prefer they did not visit often as they ruin my schedule of not doing much of anything but they do not know that , lol .

I do call them or vice versa every few days .

I am divorced but we once in a blue moon email due to daughters .

My father was Sicilian m my mother was Cuban and both sides of family hated the other so it caused some difficulties
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isn't that unusual to be Italian, and or Cuban and not have a close realtionshp with the family ?... here where I live there's a large Italian community, and they are as tight as a drum with each other
 
hollydolly said:
isn't that unusual to be Italian, and or Cuban and not have a close realtionshp with the family ?... here where I live there's a large Italian community, and they are as tight as a drum with each other
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Well my fathers and mothers side hated the other side .

Sicilian of course is Italian but if you know your Italian neighbors well ask them what they think of Sicilians , lol
 
I call it alienation, stronger than estrangement. No contact with one sister.
I too have a sister who took money from my mother for years because she would
not look for a job and sat home. She cried and whined for thousands. That's the good
sister. The other is icy and too nasty for this forum.
 
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