Awkward question for the children to answer themselves, (and those championing them)

grahamg

Old codger
You may have read the sister thread to this one, but here the focus is upon another set of "awkward questions", not those posed by children this time, but ones you might wish to pose to children whose parents have divorced/separated.

Here is something of a list:

1). Is it okay to reject one of your parents (who has loved you), simply because the parent you live with wishes you to do so?

2). Do you think your interests should trump the interests of one of at least your parents all the time?

3). Are you being brought up to believe you should put your own interests above everyone else's all the time?

4). Have you ever loved the parent you say you hate now?

5). Do you expect to tell the world how you should be brought up, or should those who loved you as much as they could when they cared for you, try their best to guide you as you grow up, (this question assumes you don't think you think you're grown up aged twelve!)?

6). Do you think it matters how many children have no contact with their father/non resident parent?

7). Do you aspire to be a good person above all else, or a successful person, (no matter what this takes?)?

I'll leave the list there for now, but feel free to come up with more awkward questions a child who may be acting in an ungrateful way might be asked.
I acknowledge though, some of these questions might be better posed to children over the age of twelve, but that's the age our UK courts have chosen as old enough to ask a child whether they love their non resident parent, and "have their views listened to and taken seriously", (thus informing the courts decision as to what might be in their best interests, which as you might know, " Is no less a question than the meaning of life", according to Mnookin).
 

This link probably fits better on the other thread generally, but because it talks about "children parenting their parents" I thought it fitted in her too:
https://psiloveyou.xyz/7-questions-kids-ask-after-divorce-37ed722fb9cc

Quote:

2. Can I fix it?

"Some people are peace keepers. Peace keeping children are the ones who intervene in an argument and tell their parents to stop fighting. They try to avoid conflict and do things to keep people happy. They might be “Yes” people and feel guilty if they upset someone.

Our beautiful peace-keepers need to be protected. They often feel like the adult in a situation. A teen peace-keeper may even act more like a parent or take on parental roles, such as caring for siblings — taking on discipline, housework, organisation of school activities. Some children even end up parenting their own parents."
 

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