Choices...we make them every day...but...

Jace

Jace

Well-known Member
As times change, so will our options...

what changes have you made or were "thrusted upon you"..

that you've had to live with? 🤔
 

My mother died aged 39 suddenly of a prescription overdose. I was 18 years old with 3 younger siblings, the youngest only 10 years old... I was told I had to stop work immediately and become the mother and take care of the house.

I was given no options.. I just had to do it...
 
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hollydolly said:
My mother dies aged 39 suddenly of a prescription overdose. I was 18 years old with 3 younger siblings, the youngest only 10 years old... I was told I had to stop work immediately and become the mother and take care of the house.

I was given no options.. I just had to do it...
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Yes, life happens...and we just deal with it!
 

I think it is a mixture for many.... we have choices but somethings happen we must deal with and go on.
Too many times people are not wanting to make choices ..... with choices comes risk that a person may have chosen poorly

Most i have seen who believe they are stuck are in fact in limbo by refusing to make a choice ....
 
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Jeni said:
I think it is a mixture for many.... we have choices but somethings happen we must deal with and go on.
Too many times people are not wanting to make choices ..... with choices comes risk that a person may have chosen poorly
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Good post. I fall into the category expressed in your last sentence, unfortunately.
 
Getting dumped in my senior years prompted many choices needed for survival, for sanity. I guess I need to be forced into making choices - or else, I avoid change.
 
hollydolly said:
My mother dies aged 39 suddenly of a prescription overdose. I was 18 years old with 3 younger siblings, the youngest only 10 years old... I was told I had to stop work immediately and become the mother and take care of the house.

I was given no options.. I just had to do it...
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How I empathise with you experience Holly. My mother died aged 33, leaving me, just short of my tenth birthday and three younger siblings. The family was split up for a while, my eighteen month old brother lived with an aunt until he was school age. My seven and four year old sisters lived with another relative and I stayed with my father. We became a united family again when the baby turned six.

We all shared domestic chores, although we were poor, but not impoverished, our home was always clean. Life was tough but we weathered it, I like to think that the experience made better people of us all. My mother though, would probably have been disappointed that her two eldest are childless and her youngest nearly was, but for a holiday slip up. That baby grew up to become a doctor, we are all very proud of her.
 
When making choices it always helps to have a working crystal ball. Sometimes there isn't enough information to be assured I am making a good choice, and no workable way to attempt to gain the missing information. Sometimes the missing information simply is not there. I hate that.

Also, from my reading about how the brain works, our choices and decisions are effected our subconcious mind, and we are not aware of it.
 
oldaunt said:
My husband died 2 years ago and now I have NO ONE to lend a hand when needed.
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I hear you also... but not because my husband died, but because he's now shacked up with some whore... and it came as suddenly to me as a death so I've grieved for him, and 10 months on, I'm just coming out of that, but in many ways it's like a death only in some ways worse, however like you, I'm lost now without someone to 'lend a hand' or do the jobs I just can't do... and each time I can't do them , I'm thinking of him and wishing he was here, and I really need to get past ever thinking about him again...
 
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Parents divorced when I was 11, had to assume all household duties and cooking as my other siblings were either in college or wouldn't do anything. Traumatized from 5 years old till 17. That's all I want to say about that. Got severe depression anxiety and PTSD. Abusiveness from husbands. Disabled due to severe mental health issues for many many years. Best thing that ever happened to me was pets. They are so loving.
 
Jace said:
As times change, so will our options...

what changes have you made or were "thrusted upon you"..

that you've had to live with? 🤔
Click to expand...
I was living a pretty good, safe life with my first husband and son. As soon as my son graduated from high school, my husband told me he wanted a divorce. Turned out he was having an affair with a topless dancer (who could not dance anymore) who had been friends with both of us. Up until then he had done everything for me. I had to grow up fast and get a job even though he was generous with alimony. Had to leave my beautiful home and he ended up moving into it with his new girlfriend.
 
We all have our own problems...

And..what is the old expression... Something like...wouldn't want to walk in the other person's shoes.🤗
 
My poor health. I hate it. HATE not being the powerful person I once was. Now it's an inner debate whether or not to even leaving the apartment. I hate all the pain I have and what it's done to me and how so much enjoyment went away because I have it. I'm trying hard to accept it, but I resent it, resent being an old bag. If it weren't for my son & grandson..............I have no reason to stay around & wouldn't.
 
A change that came upon me gradually was not being able to walk very well due to my knees. They didn't get bad overnight. I learned to live with it little by little. Now they are really painful at times (but not when I am sitting). Moving here though has made living with limited mobility much easier. Plus I have a walker and the mobility chair so I can get around. If I start to feel sorry for myself I look around and see many people who are worse off than I am. My mother was one of those, So I often think of what she had to endure. She did not live to see me start having trouble with my knees. I am glad about that.

I had no choice in this change so it was thrust at me for sure.
 

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