Chronic diseases and effects on marriage

hollydolly said:
yes as I say I have suffered from OA for many years now.. and your consultant will have you given you idea on how to cope...
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Yes he has. I must do physio soon, I can have steroid injections if needed. Ultimately only surgery will be the answer. Yet I am in company with so many people.
 
I'm dismayed that my husband is not keen on getting a light portable wheelchair for me at least for outings. I can't see any other way for us to go out for days at least. I can walk but not for a long way. We both love museums and art galleries. Yet there is a mind block about a wheelchair. I am not exactly relishing the idea but it would be the solution.
 
Rose65 said:
I'm dismayed that my husband is not keen on getting a light portable wheelchair for me at least for outings. I can't see any other way for us to go out for days at least. I can walk but not for a long way. We both love museums and art galleries. Yet there is a mind block about a wheelchair. I am not exactly relishing the idea but it would be the solution.
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As I got it, your husband has the mind block about a wheelchair for you. Because he is embarrassed to have a wife that uses a wheelchair? Well, then tell him that my wife accepted me at the first moment she noticed my medical compression pantyhose (such a horrible thing only for old women, as most of the people think. They are completely wrong, but that would be a new thread). It was she who encouraged me to wear them openly to shorts! Since the year 2000 I do it.
 
Rose65 said:
I'm dismayed that my husband is not keen on getting a light portable wheelchair for me at least for outings. I can't see any other way for us to go out for days at least. I can walk but not for a long way. We both love museums and art galleries. Yet there is a mind block about a wheelchair. I am not exactly relishing the idea but it would be the solution.
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Perhaps you could simply ask him what the problem is . Maybe he thinks that you’ll rely too heavily on using the wheelchair and lose whatever muscle tone you have. Some conversations are difficult to have and I can see where this could certainly be a problem. If he’s not willing to push you, are you able to use your arms to move this wheels yourself?
 
PeppermintPatty said:
Perhaps you could simply ask him what the problem is . Maybe he thinks that you’ll rely too heavily on using the wheelchair and lose whatever muscle tone you have. Some conversations are difficult to have and I can see where this could certainly be a problem. If he’s not willing to push you, are you able to use your arms to move this wheels yourself?
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Thanks. He seems to think I am giving up.
I am trying to be realistic.
 
Rose, why don’t you start with a Rollator. It takes some of the pressure off you and you can sit and rest when you’re tired.

A friend who had to push his wife‘s wheelchair said it was very difficult.
 
Rose65 said:
Thanks. He seems to think I am giving up.
I am trying to be realistic.
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Finding alternative ways of coping with chronic pain isnt giving up. I think accepting the fact that you can’t walk long distances any more is showing strength and resilience. Get the lightweight wheelchair and use it for longer distances and walk as much as you can so you don’t seize up.
 

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