Don't know why I didn't think of this before, this thread is a wide open opportunity to post jokes starting, "Off to the doctor I did go,...., now if only I can clean them up enough for the fairly polite company here(?)
I remember one my father used to repeat a joke or rhyme about a man being castigated by his doctor for getting his girlfriend pregnant, and the young mans account started,
"I took down her combinations,
and undertook the investigations"!
The doctor said: "You did her no good"!
The young man replied: "I did her as well as I ........

(you'll have to fill the last word in yourself)