Dear Ronni just wanted to tell you...

MarciKS

aka Fritz
I just want to say that I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I know it's hard. I also know there's not a thing any of us can say to fix the pain you're in otherwise I'm sure we would. Just know we're here for you. It's going to be hard.

I'm not gonna tell you that it's all gonna be ok because it might not. I remember when my mother died. It was the worst day of my life. My parents are the only people I've ever had my whole life.

I loved them despite being verbally and emotionally abused most of my life by them. After mom passed my own father wouldn't even comfort me. Then I found out she wanted to get rid of me and tried a couple times. So then I was stuck dealing with the loss as well as the grief of years of trauma at the hands of my parents.

I honestly didn't think I was ever gonna recover. I shut down emotionally and did everything I could to keep my mind busy to block out the pain and having to deal with her death. It's been 2 yrs now and I am just now starting to recover.

I spent countless hours envisioning the horror she must have gone through dying from Covid. I would see things at work that would take me there as well. It's an awful thing to deal with the loss of a loved one. I know it's worse when it's your children.

I also know life will still continue on even though it has stopped for you right now. Many days you'll just be lingering and I understand that. There will be holidays and memories and people asking how you're doing. It's gonna be hard. But I will be praying for you and your family. I will pray for God to bring you comfort. Just know that we are all thinking of you during this time.

Just try to take care of yourself in the meantime.
 

MarciKS: I’m not sure if I should be adding anything to your post, but I feel the need to tell you that I think you are a very strong person. When a child has parents as you did and suffered through emotional and verbal abuse, plus a mother that attempted to end her pregnancy and later have a father that showed no empathy and yet can say that you love them tells me a lot about how strong you are.

How you got past all that is amazing to some degree. I once assisted in an investigation of a son that killed his father for being treated similarly to the way you were treated. Some parents shouldn’t be parents. I have also investigated siblings that beat up their parents. I know we, as Troopers shouldn’t take sides, but after I learned what the kids went through, I thought to myself, “They (the mom or dad) deserved to get their a$$ kicked.”

As for Ronni, I have given death notices to several parents that their child was killed in a vehicle or motorcycle accident. Every parent had told me the same thing. “There’s nothing worse than a parent losing a child.” I can only imagine that being true. It’s something that no parent ever wants to face. We don’t prepare for it. There are no instructions that tell us what we are supposed to do if it should happen. I truly hope Ronni finds what will make her OK again. Love and support from her family are a good start. How much time it will take depends on her. We are all different when it comes to healing. I wish her the best.
 

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