Do people tend to feel persecuted by others, or by circumstances?

Paco Dennis

Paco Dennis

SF VIP
Location
Mid-Missouri
I have recently discovered how I have many buried feelings about being "persecuted" by other people and by circumstances that came my way. There is a LOT of stuff. My understanding now is that maybe I wasn't being persecuted. I make up the victim position, and then use excuses to support how "they" intentionally tried to hurt me. I see now where I still have resentments that come through my communication to others. I guess I am perceiving a way to transform those "victim" feelings/thoughts into rational understanding. ?
 

you know just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't mean everything is your fault. people can dish out the nitpicking no problem. but by God you so much as breathe wrong in their direction and you are a piece of sh*t. your perception may or may not be right or wrong. but i'm guessing if it's making you feel bad...then it's on them. *hugs*
 
Paco Dennis said:
I have recently discovered how I have many buried feelings about being "persecuted" by other people and by circumstances that came my way. There is a LOT of stuff. My understanding now is that maybe I wasn't being persecuted. I make up the victim position, and then use excuses to support how "they" intentionally tried to hurt me. I see now where I still have resentments that come through my communication to others. I guess I am perceiving a way to transform those "victim" feelings/thoughts into rational understanding. ?
Click to expand...
That is a big step in resolving memories of the past, whereby you've shifted your focus and are considering alternative explanations.

Surely most of us have similar history that needs scrutinizing and possibly redefining.
 

i already know that a lot of my past is blurred with false perceptions. although, there are a lot of things that i picked up on and discovered i was right about. i think we all instinctively have something inside us that just knows if we're being victimized.
 
I'm not so sure I have felt persecuted but I've sure had too much go wrong. I often have that feeling of belonging no place. I see socialization at work. I'm not social there. I take work too seriously. Have to do everything right, I might get in trouble if I don't. That's my trauma brain at work.

Sometimes I have literal overwhelming episodes of anger. Luckily they don't last too long. My cats help calm me.

I was bullied in school pretty bad and had no outlet or anyone to talk to about that. I wonder about those people sometimes. How their lives turned out. Better than mine? I'll bet some did.
 
Remy said:
I'm not so sure I have felt persecuted but I've sure had too much go wrong. I often have that feeling of belonging no place. I see socialization at work. I'm not social there. I take work too seriously. Have to do everything right, I might get in trouble if I don't. That's my trauma brain at work.

Sometimes I have literal overwhelming episodes of anger. Luckily they don't last too long. My cats help calm me.

I was bullied in school pretty bad and had no outlet or anyone to talk to about that. I wonder about those people sometimes. How their lives turned out. Better than mine? I'll bet some did.
Click to expand...
You never know. Karma has a way of fixing things sometimes. :ROFLMAO:
 
MarciKS said:
you know just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't mean everything is your fault. people can dish out the nitpicking no problem. but by God you so much as breathe wrong in their direction and you are a piece of sh*t. your perception may or may not be right or wrong. but i'm guessing if it's making you feel bad...then it's on them. *hugs*
Click to expand...

The feeling I have of being persecuted doesn't involve people disagreeing with me. For example, I have been angry ever since that my family fell to pieces after my mother died when I was 13. I felt like I was persecuted for having a screwed up family, and still have bad feelings about it. I behave sometimes with sarcasm or discontent when "family" is mentioned n a positive way. That is just one example, and I have plenty more like that. It is the same kind of question as "why do bad things happen to good people?" Maybe there are no "good" or "bad" people. There are just people, and stuff happens to us all. It isn't personal although it feels that way. How can we understand that what we take personally might be our own anger at some hurt WE experienced?
 
Some people suffer from paranoia and will see slights in everything anyone says. Others are genuinely picked on by others, often because they are different in some way. Just like lower animals, humans feel threatened by anyone who doesn't quite fit into their idea of normal.
As we get older, we should be able to step back and see things from a different perspective.
 
Coming from a dysfunctional family, I know how you feel. Being made to feel guilty for even existing, was pretty awful and coloured my view of the world in a dark light for the longest time. Sending you hugs from across the pond 🤗
 
I've never thought about this. I don't think I've ever felt persecuted, but I have been disliked, rejected, and an outsider at different times. However, persecution does exist. Ask any minority group, and you're going to get a different response than I would give.
 
I have to change my perception about being persecuted. Maybe I have a couple of times for something, but never in the common use of the word. Maybe it is more akin to feeling inadequate. I was a middle child of 3 boys so competition was in the air. When I lost or fell short of what was expected of me I felt inadequate. Yes that is a much more appropriate word.
 
I have been persecuted, most recently for declining the vax. In the past I have flat out been betrayed by so called best friends. I never saw it coming. Sometimes you can be right in your assessment of a situation you know. Just call it as you see it and stick to the facts and your principles. :unsure:
 
Paco Dennis said:
The feeling I have of being persecuted doesn't involve people disagreeing with me. For example, I have been angry ever since that my family fell to pieces after my mother died when I was 13. I felt like I was persecuted for having a screwed up family, and still have bad feelings about it. I behave sometimes with sarcasm or discontent when "family" is mentioned n a positive way. That is just one example, and I have plenty more like that. It is the same kind of question as "why do bad things happen to good people?" Maybe there are no "good" or "bad" people. There are just people, and stuff happens to us all. It isn't personal although it feels that way. How can we understand that what we take personally might be our own anger at some hurt WE experienced?
Click to expand...
"How can we understand that what we take personally might be our own anger at some hurt WE experienced?"

That is normal for a lot of people. It's part of who we are. If your family is screwed up why do you feel like it's your fault?
 
MarciKS said:
"How can we understand that what we take personally might be our own anger at some hurt WE experienced?"

That is normal for a lot of people. It's part of who we are. If your family is screwed up why do you feel like it's your fault?
Click to expand...
Like I said earlier I think I felt inadequate. I did poorly in school after. I quit sports, became involved in the "hip" crowd". Lost out on going to college. Inadequate because I had no discipline. Who provides guidance....parents are a big influence.
 
Paco Dennis said:
Like I said earlier I think I felt inadequate. I did poorly in school after. I quit sports, became involved in the "hip" crowd". Lost out on going to college. Inadequate because I had no discipline. Who provides guidance....parents are a big influence.
Click to expand...
Don't you think that schools could have done more back then though? I remember a few teachers telling me to "cheer up" as if saying that wouldn't instantly change my mood! Now though, schools are more attuned to different changes and behaviour and get the parents involved sooner.
 
helenbacque said:
Yesterday is history. Set it aside and move on.
Click to expand...
Knowing the history of a subject or object is very important to make smart choices, IMHO. We have no choice but to move on....time has a way of moving us forward no matter what we think. Yea, so move forward and consider one's attitude ( emotions ) is probably affecting what is communicated.
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top