Do you still want and even need approval from others?

Serenity4321

Serenity4321

Senior Member
Location
Florida
I think we all grow up needing and wanting approval from parents, friends, and even strangers. As we mature we usually can stand on our own confidence and stop worrying so much about others' opinions. I have come a long way but still find there are some areas that still need work..so I wondered how it was for everyone else here...

I am editing my original, as I often feel the need to do after reading some comments. :)
I find I do not always clearly state my questions. Part of this was the idea of worrying about what others think of you even if you are not looking for verbal approval. e.g. would it bother you if you went to an informal event wearing formal clothes because you misunderstood the event
 

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I like approval, I don't necessarily need it. For example I have let my grass grow tall and I ignore my daughter's complaints about it, but I felt very good at the approval expressed by the UPS delivery guy about my nice 'prairie'. :)
 

Other than a few close family members and friends and at work, no. I used to be the exact opposite and tried to please everyone. I went to counseling right after undergrad and told the therapist at the first visit that I felt like two people ...the sweet "Southern Belle" people expected in those days and the real, not particularly sweet, inside me. He eventually agreed. Said once ...and I quote verbatim: "You know, you really aren't very sweet. You're quite acerbic." But at least I'm one person now lol.
 
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When younger I loved approval, not in the way of - "you are allowed to do such and such", but rather, "great call, Marg, you did right".

My husband and I constantly ask one another - "what do you think", "do you like it", when doing projects together, it's our way to ensure were both content and happy with what the end result will be.

I think human nature (for the most part) enjoys a little approval, because it helps remind us that not only are we doing right, but what we are doing is still being embraced by others and in keeping with the times, or has a following of those who practice/do the same.
 
ABSOLUTELY NOT! While all the seniors around here are walking around in what look like government approved shorts even in cold weather, this here Packer wears long pants. I don't need anyone's approach and I don't have to prove I'm mancho. At the age of 75 I laugh at all those, "look at me, please, I'm mancho." I kissed peer pressure goodbye many, many years ago & might I add, "Goodbye to bad Rubbish."
 
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I don't need approval but I do appreciate and value the few people that are willing to look beyond my gruff rather rumpled exterior and accept me for who I am.

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”― Bernard M. Baruch
 
i no longer care whether people like me or approve of me. i am who i am and if they don't like it they can kiss my hiney.

you get what you give. if you want people to be nice to you and care about you, it has to be returned. otherwise it's useless.
 
Ruthanne said:
Sometimes I seem to care what people think but then I stop myself and say a few expletives to myself and the heck with it.
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That's the ticket

Back when we was kids, my grandma always told us "in this lifetime y'all aren't gonna like everybody and everybody is not gonna like you. If you walk around tryin' to get everybody to like, ya ain't gonna be nothin' but an a**-kisser."
 
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