Heard of Elder Orphans?

dilettante said:
17 minutes.


New term to me, but a search turned up lots of hits.
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Yes I watched that Video the other day... I have to say..I'm in the same position except unlike this woman I'm not estranged from my child/ren.. but I'm an orphan too as are many of us when we get to this age..( she's the same age as I am )... but her Pity party got on my nerves and I had to stop it off..
 

Alizerine said:
Not sure if I qualify because I don't live alone. But I have no family or significant other. Just 2 housemates.
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see, altho' they're not family.. at least when you have someone living with you, you don't have that same concern that those of us who live alone., have , and that is being seriously ill..or dying, and no-one knowing about it for days or possibly weeks in some cases..
 
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Dying is a selfish leave the building positive accomplishment. (y)And Thank you God.
Ya had little or no choice on being born and Thank God it’s Done! :ROFLMAO: Those who leave early
thru dumb act or suicide just says the Hell with This Crap.

That was meant as comical but I’m pretty sure those who left on their own choice think thats
correct.

Maybe it was their way to be famous in some way, Immortal cause they left1crap in the pants.
 
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hollydolly said:
see, altho' they're not family.. at least when you have someone living with you, you don't have that same concern that those of who live alone., have , and that is being seriously ill..or dying, and no-one knowing about it for days or possibly weeks in some cases..
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I live alone, old and I'm disabled. The only thing that could make me more alone is if I had leprosy. My "kid" brother, 68, is 250 miles away. I'm not afraid of dying. I just don't want to die, unnoticed, then rot and stink up the place.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
I live alone, old and I'm disabled. The only thing that could make me more alone is if I had leprosy. My "kid" brother, 68, is 250 miles away. I'm not afraid of dying. I just don't want to die, unnoticed, then rot and stink up the place.
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Non of us who live alone want that to happen to us....

At least you have all of us, perhaps you should give a trusted friend on here, your email address or phone number so if they don't see you for a day or 2 they can check up on you..
 
I've thought of this. My stepfather has me, though I don't tell him I resent him. For example, he tells me Sunday he's almost out of his cats hyperthyroid medication. So I call it into Costco, pick it up 2 days later, cut the small pills into quarters. They have magically appeared for him

When he was hospitalized and in rehab, I took care of the cats and his other house needs.

I've already thought of this, I'll be alone. I can only imagine if I'm hospitalized in some emergency situation, I'll be calling a pet sitting business to get my cats fed. I'll have no choice. I'll have no one to take me places if I temporarily or permanently can't drive.

I drove my stepfather to all appointments and shopping until he could drive again. I remember going to the farmers market, two health food stores and Safeway. All in the same morning. This didn't seem to bother him a bit. I didn't say anything but I was thinking 'can't you eliminate one?'

All while my brother yelled at me from the east coast that I wasn't doing anything. I'm totally f%#*'d
 
hollydolly said:
see, altho' they're not family.. at least when you have someone living with you, you don't have that same concern that those of us who live alone., have , and that is being seriously ill..or dying, and no-one knowing about it for days or possibly weeks in some cases..
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Do you mind if I ask, do you have some sort of Life Alert gizmo that you carry with you all the time just in case? If you do, does it make you feel less anxious about living alone?

The reason I ask is my mom who lives in the next province, has expressed lately that she experiences a lot of anxiety.....and I've tried to get her to invest in something like that. Maybe if I could tell her it's helpful with anxiety, she might give it a second thought.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
I live alone, old and I'm disabled. The only thing that could make me more alone is if I had leprosy. My "kid" brother, 68, is 250 miles away. I'm not afraid of dying. I just don't want to die, unnoticed, then rot and stink up the place.
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Maybe seniors in your situation could look into registering with a wake up service in your area. They would call you at a prearranged time and if you didn't pick up, they'd call 911 on your behalf. I just Googled it and one link said they charge $5.99 a month so it's not even too costly.
 
I live in a grandfather flat in the middle of a forest - maybe hard to picture but true. It abuts a 11 metre long steel garage in which I have a wash house and clothes line - the roof is steel also and it gets pretty hot in there - clothes dry quick! My daily contacts are mobile ph and internet - but no one is checking on me daily. Should I have a heart attack now and die - I do hope my dog will not see the need to start chewing my fingers but I wouldn't be surprised if he did! But Debrah has just reminded me to investigate a " daily call in service option"? thanks Debrah!
 
Debrah N. said:
Do you mind if I ask, do you have some sort of Life Alert gizmo that you carry with you all the time just in case? If you do, does it make you feel less anxious about living alone?

The reason I ask is my mom who lives in the next province, has expressed lately that she experiences a lot of anxiety.....and I've tried to get her to invest in something like that. Maybe if I could tell her it's helpful with anxiety, she might give it a second thought.
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No I don't have anything like that.
 
davey said:
I live in a grandfather flat in the middle of a forest - maybe hard to picture but true. It abuts a 11 metre long steel garage in which I have a wash house and clothes line - the roof is steel also and it gets pretty hot in there - clothes dry quick! My daily contacts are mobile ph and internet - but no one is checking on me daily. Should I have a heart attack now and die - I do hope my dog will not see the need to start chewing my fingers but I wouldn't be surprised if he did! But Debrah has just reminded me to investigate a " daily call in service option"? thanks Debrah!
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I love the idea of living in the middle of a forest! Sounds lovely, watching the forest creatures passing by, hearing the sounds of birds in the trees around, no traffic sounds.....I think of some of the forests in British Columbia, that we have hiked in! Oh dear, now I feel homesick for our forests and giant trees and mossy banks!
 
hollydolly said:
Yes I watched that Video the other day... I have to say..I'm in the same position except unlike this woman I'm not estranged from my child/ren.. but I'm an orphan too as are many of us when we get to this age..( she's the same age as I am )... but her Pity party got on my nerves and I had to stop it off..
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She whining and she's only 69. I'm 74 and prefer solo ager than elder orphan. Telling someone that you are an elder orphan, seems like you are trying to get people to feel sorry for you. After 7 minutes I had enough. She made it sound like other countries care more for their elderly. I've been working in nursing homes 27 out of the last 28 years (retired one year). I've seen elder Americans treated respectfully and cared for all the time. Every day you go to work, you are aware that you are working in a place where people bring their mothers and fathers to live out the rest of their lives. You treat them like you would want people to treat your parents.
 
Paladin1950 said:
She whining and she's only 69. I'm 74 and prefer solo ager than elder orphan. Telling someone that you are an elder orphan, seems like you are trying to get people to feel sorry for you. After 7 minutes I had enough. She made it sound like other countries care more for their elderly. I've been working in nursing homes 27 out of the last 28 years (retired one year). I've seen elder Americans treated respectfully and cared for all the time. Every day you go to work, you are aware that you are working in a place where people bring their mothers and fathers to live out the rest of their lives. You treat them like you would want people to treat your parents.
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I did the same , I stopped off the video early... I couldn't stand the Pity Party from her
 
Debrah N. said:
Do you mind if I ask, do you have some sort of Life Alert gizmo that you carry with you all the time just in case? If you do, does it make you feel less anxious about living alone?

The reason I ask is my mom who lives in the next province, has expressed lately that she experiences a lot of anxiety.....and I've tried to get her to invest in something like that. Maybe if I could tell her it's helpful with anxiety, she might give it a second thought.
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Yup Life Alert. They are great. A couple of my relatives got them when they became widowed.
 
chic said:
Yup Life Alert. They are great. A couple of my relatives got them when they became widowed.
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I wish I could talk my mother into one. I think they're a great idea. But she is as stubborn as they come and besides, I have a hunch that she's working towards making sure I feel guilty forever when they find her decomposed body;) with the further plan of haunting me forever after. That little voice, whispering in my ear for the rest of my years,"it's all your fault that I died alone!". Not that we haven't tried to talk her into moving back to Alberta and be closer to her great grandchildren, granddaughter and her remaining brothers and sisters!
 
davey said:
MY grandkids keep moving around the world too much I just can't keep up with them - thanks god for facebook!!
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My husband and I have moved A LOT but we've finally settled down too. I've often joked that in past lives we were gypsies and in this one, should have had our 'house' on wheels. My problem is that I'm a big-time nester and nesting with a caravan is a lot harder. But even so, my old mom has it in her head that she doesn't want to get pulled into her families drama so what can we do except make sure we all phone regularly (every three days for me and my daughter) and send lots of great grandkids pics.
 
Debrah N. said:
I wish I could talk my mother into one. I think they're a great idea. But she is as stubborn as they come and besides, I have a hunch that she's working towards making sure I feel guilty forever when they find her decomposed body;) with the further plan of haunting me forever after. That little voice, whispering in my ear for the rest of my years,"it's all your fault that I died alone!". Not that we haven't tried to talk her into moving back to Alberta and be closer to her great grandchildren, granddaughter and her remaining brothers and sisters!
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You could give her Life Alert as a gift. Many people do. All you have to do is pay for the subscription costs and maintain it. Many people do this for their elder relatives who are financially pressed, or just stubborn, and Life Alert does make a really nice gift. They do relieve one mind and their service was always great. (y)
 
chic said:
You could give her Life Alert as a gift. Many people do. All you have to do is pay for the subscription costs and maintain it. Many people do this for their elder relatives who are financially pressed, or just stubborn, and Life Alert does make a really nice gift. They do relieve one mind and their service was always great. (y)
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I've thought of that too, but she isn't the sort of person who'd make sure she took it with her always. I've even suggested just a little cheap phone with the most basic plan just so she could call 911 if she fell off a ladder while she's scrubbing her house gutters, but she won't do it. I've done all the research to make it easy as possible, where to get it, what the price is, who to call and she just brushes every suggestion off. And my mother is not financially strapped. She's very, very comfortable. She's better off than I am. I have a budget that I have to stick to and she owns two houses near Vancouver, BC and two recreational lots in the interior on a lake.
 
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