How Do You End a Conversation With Someone in Real Life?

Lara

Lara

Friend of the Arts
Location
Mid-Atlantic Coast
Ending an Online Conversation is easy.
Just stop posting and let them have the last word.
But in Real Life...
if someone talks over you,
won't let you speak and just keeps talking...
try dropping something.
When you reach to pick it up, start talking.
You'll interrupt them without them realizing it.

Or just say I won't keep you any longer, have a good day.

If someone is arguing or ranting on about something,
remain calm and just stare at them.
They'll get uncomfortable and stop.
In the Big picture, letting someone have the last word is no big deal.
 

Lara said:
Ending an Online Conversation is easy.
Just stop posting and let them have the last word.
But in Real Life...
if someone talks over you,
won't let you speak and just keeps talking...
try dropping something.
When you reach to pick it up, start talking.
You'll interrupt them without them realizing it.

Or just say I won't keep you any longer, have a good day.

If someone is arguing or ranting on about something,
remain calm and just stare at them.
They'll get uncomfortable and stop.
In the Big picture, letting someone have the last word is no big deal.
Click to expand...
Shoving an apple in their cake-hole works for me, Lara. ;) 😊
 
A great observation and even better question, Lara.

It all depends on the kind of person you are, if you are quiet and
respectful, you will listen, then leave when he/she stops to take a
breath.

If you are like I am, you will probably interrupt them, I have a friend
who lives alone and dominates any conversation, when he can, I did
let him years ago, but not any more, he is told to stop interrupting
me, when I stop for a breath, also when the subject gets out of hand,
I again stop him, this sounds like I am down on him, but I am not, just
fair and all conversations are not conversations if only one is doing all
the talking!

Be fair, but be firm.

Mike.
 

@timoc you never fail to make me laugh.
It's not even 6am here so it's a great way to start my day!
Thank you

I hear you @Mike In the past two days I have been in a one-way conversation with 3 different strangers. I couldn't believe how much they talked non-stop and it took me by surprise. They were very nice and very happy to be visiting the area here but overwhelming.

So I researched a plan for next time. I realized that I care about what they are saying but they really aren't interested in my input. After a while it wears thin.
 
We have mostly senior dog walkers in our area. A lot of them are lonely and just want to talk if they see you doing yardwork outside.

Or I have one neighbor that always wants to show me something inside.

I like listening to people but I know what you mean Lara. You just have to have an excuse when it gets toooo long. I will usually just say that it's been nice having this chat, we must do it again, but I have to start dinner, lunch, take something out of the oven, or feed the cat, he is generally in the window watching so that works.
 
Good suggestions Lee! I like the excuses you suggested, especially that you have to take something out of the oven because that's urgent.
You sound very patient and kind, like when you say "it's nice having a chat, we must do it again".
 
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True @Judycat I think an unavoidable phone call they must take would be the exception to the rule. I would smile, give them a little wave, and quietly walk away.

Not all phone calls are avoidable so we have to give them some slack but we don't have to hang around. And they probably wouldn't even want us to.
 
I guess I am like anyone else, when I listen to people talk, half the time I am just thinking about how to respond, without really reflecting on what they are saying.

One time, my boss started saying some very racist things. And it annoyed me. And I was going to give him a piece of my mind.

Earlier that day, I had spent time with a friend who was a social worker. And he was talking to me about "the art of listening.'

Now, mind you, this is not something I really do...but...instead of responding back to my boss with anger and a lecture, I just stopped.

I listened.

And when I did, something happened. He started opening up. Apparently, he had been mugged not too long ago. He wasn't a racist, he was traumatized by being mugged...and angry and started spouting some racist language because of that.

And the end of the conversation, I could see he was relieved....that anyone would hear him out. We became friends. The entire staff became friends. My boss had a band. The entire staff started going to his shows, socializing with him at his house and meeting his family.

And just because, for a moment, I actually listened to some advice by a professional.
 
Lara said:
Ending an Online Conversation is easy.
Just stop posting and let them have the last word.
But in Real Life...
if someone talks over you,
won't let you speak and just keeps talking...
try dropping something.
When you reach to pick it up, start talking.
You'll interrupt them without them realizing it.

Or just say I won't keep you any longer, have a good day.

If someone is arguing or ranting on about something,
remain calm and just stare at them.
They'll get uncomfortable and stop.
In the Big picture, letting someone have the last word is no big deal.
Click to expand...
It's also important to remember that people who "won't let you finish" may not merely be jerks, but may actually be suffering some kind of stress...minor or major...and that is affecting their speech and making it frenetic, rather than merely some kind of manifestation of ego.
 
Lara said:
In the Big picture, letting someone have the last word is no big deal.
Click to expand...
That is the biggest take away from this post. It's in human DNA to have the last word. It is such a hard thing to do. I've wanted to write a 16 page rebuttal to what someone said. But, I didn't. And a couple of days later, it's who gives a hell. It IS hard to walk away, I don't always do that.
 
If someone is ranting and raving, I ask them, "You are telling me this because???" That usually stops them, knowing what their rant is about just doesn't interest or concern me.

If someone tries over talking me, I tell them to be quiet so I or someone else can get a word into the conversation.

Or, do what my mother use to do, repeat what their saying without the vocals coming out. Her mouth would always move and confuse those she did it to, thus stopping them from talking.
 
JonSR77 said:
"the art of listening.'
Click to expand...
It really is a lost art. We’re so busy thinking about our reply that we don’t truly hear what others say.

JonSR77 said:
that people who "won't let you finish"
Click to expand...
I have that super friendly friend who just loves to talk. She’s very entertaining so I’ve given up and just let her talk.

Jan14 said:
I often just say, I have to be going, it was nice talking to you.
Click to expand...
That’s what I do too.
 
Jan14 said:
Sounds like slot of men!
Click to expand...
Men and women alike but I don't keep count. One bad habit I picked up from my job is I tend to repeat what people say back to them. We do it to confirm their statement on record even when they're not slurring their words. I'm sure it annoys some people.
 
RFW said:
Men and women alike but I don't keep count. One bad habit I picked up from my job is I tend to repeat what people say back to them. We do it to confirm their statement on record even when they're not slurring their words. I'm sure it annoys some people.
Click to expand...
Maybe since you repeat their words, you have nothing to say. You’ve probably learned to be a good listener. My last husband was quiet. He was a wonderful listener and had a great memory.
 

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