How many "loves" have there been in your life?

That's a little difficult for me because I am polyamorous. I love my husband. I love my boyfriends, who are both long distance, but my love for my husband is a far deeper, pure, enduring thing. It is the beginning and the end.

I do love my boyfriends, but in a different way; they are precious to me, but not lifemates. And it is the same for them; one is married and his wife is for him as my husband is to me and we both understand and respect that. The other is not married, but I am aware he may some day meet someone in person he will then want to spend his life with.

So, if I count my boyfriends and the one love before my husband, it's five.

LOL! Those numbers don't add up do they? I can actually count... just neglected to mention somebody. Sheesh. LOL
I just recently became acquainted with polyamory...One of my best friends shared her experiences. I find it fascinating. There was a time I would have judged but fortunately, those days are way behind me. What I can't understand is why there is no jealousy..maybe that is just me and my insecurities?
I had 4 very meaningful loves in my life plus some crushes...and I think I would have been jealous if they were polyamorous. Especially if sex was involved. Yet, I can see the benefits and good for you and I am happy you can make it work! All the best!
 
In retrospect I would have to say two, although there were others that I thought I was in love with. There are two that I still think about and wish things might have been different.
 

OK. Defining love as being heartbroken when it is over.

Two in college. Lost my virginity with Joanne when she was drunk. She dumped me three weeks later because she said her other boyfriend was more compatible s*xually. I was crushed for a year. But hey, I lost my virginity !

The other one in college was Karen. We met each other's s*xual desires very well, but I was often sad for no reason when making the long winter trek to her farmhouse. She dumped me in a feminist rage sometime right after we graduated. I was heartbroken.

Post college : My wife. Loved her, but she divorced me. Heartbroken and lots of anger. Huge disaster.

My girl fiend I met after my divorce: She was so nice to me. She was mental is some ways, but I did love her. Very sad when she died. We 'clicked'. It was love at first sight, sort of.

No loves since my girl friend died. So, a total of four loves.

Looking for my next love currently. Waiting for the next 'click' to happen. Probably will have to go through lots of dating to find her.
 
Instead of looking for great sex with a wife, look for a steady companion and a good friend. As we age the ability to have sex disappears anyway. I value my wife for being my best friend and we are always helping each other. We are married 62 years but sex disappeared after 30 years. We do have 2 kids, six grandkids, and many great grandkids. Other than my daughter, we rarely ever see the others.
 
OK. Defining love as being heartbroken when it is over.

Two in college. Lost my virginity with Joanne when she was drunk. She dumped me three weeks later because she said her other boyfriend was more compatible s*xually. I was crushed for a year. But hey, I lost my virginity !

The other one in college was Karen. We met each other's s*xual desires very well, but I was often sad for no reason when making the long winter trek to her farmhouse. She dumped me in a feminist rage sometime right after we graduated. I was heartbroken.

Post college : My wife. Loved her, but she divorced me. Heartbroken and lots of anger. Huge disaster.

My girl fiend I met after my divorce: She was so nice to me. She was mental is some ways, but I did love her. Very sad when she died. We 'clicked'. It was love at first sight, sort of.

No loves since my girl friend died. So, a total of four loves.

Looking for my next love currently. Waiting for the next 'click' to happen. Probably will have to go through lots of dating to find her.
There must be a lesson in that very candid response. I'm not sure what it is, but thought provoking none the less.
 
I have had three true loves in my lifetime. One is passed, and still friends with the other two, we live now
in different countries though.
 
There must be a lesson in that very candid response. I'm not sure what it is, but thought provoking none the less.

Thanks, Dave.

I think the lesson for me is that no matter how much we try, we can't make love a 'just play fair and no one gets hurt' affair.
 
Real or imagined?

My parents sold a little fruit during the 50's, 'Pick your own'. Met & played with one little blond haired girl while she waited. She left my life, never to return. She was my 'benchmark' love from then on. There may have been 5-6 mostly one-sided since.

As for imagined - many, many. The breaker was Reba McIntire until the wife pointed out she didn't have an upper lip. Too heart broken to dream of more.
 
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Thanks, Dave.

I think the lesson for me is that no matter how much we try, we can't make love a 'just play fair and no one gets hurt.
I think we learn from each experience like yours, although when I asked a close friend after a particularly horrible divorce what he learned, he smiled rather broadly and replied, "I didn't learn anything as far as I can tell." :)
 
Too many to list. Freddy, Freddy the 2nd, Froggy, Froggy the 2nd, Ferdinand….
 


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