How Sure Were You Going In To Your Marriage (Failed) Would Work?

fmdog44

fmdog44

Well-known Member
Location
Houston, Texas
Viewing another related topic seeing posts about marriages this question came to me. I have witnessed friends still married to the high school sweethearts and others whose marriages failed within a year. It must suck when it hits a person they have made a mistake. I think the saddest thing is to learn of people that stayed married but did not want to. Can you give the moment in your life when it hit you it is time for a change?
 

When I began feeling that I didn't want to go home because I knew what and who was behind the door of my home. That and when I dreaded my then wife walking through that door if I happened to be alone already there. But where were we to go? We shared that home together. We were young and couldn't have afforded separate residences. They say that love conquers all and maybe it does but love is, for the most part, ephermal.
 
We got married on April Fool's Day. He was a fool for getting married again, and I was a fool for marrying a two time loser. But it wasn't going to fail if it was my decision. Married for life dammit. He felt the same way. Drove each other nuts though. Never marry someone like yourself. Discovered two of me was way too much me.
 

My "ex" ( we lived together for ten years) has a gambling problem. It's was one of those things that you didn't notice it until you noticed it. I knew she like to play the lottery, and liked the race track. I began to notice the lies. She said she was late getting home from work because she had to buy cat treats, but then, next day, she had to stop, and buy cat treats. I found out she took the day off from work to go to A. C. to gamble, without telling me about it. There was just so many more lies. I went to Gamblers Anonymous. I asked if she had a problem. They told me that I knew she did, and I did. They said the since we weren't married, as soon as she found out I knew about the addiction, she'd be gone. I don't know what it was that told her I knew, but she left. I didn't try to stop her. It wasn't the gambling. but the lies. I wasn't that sad it was over. Haven't seen her since.
Afterwards, I found out she was spending a minimum $10-20 daily on lottery tickets. (At least $4,500- $8,000+ on lottery tickets alone.) Plus she lost many more thousands at OTB. I don't know how she did it. We made the same salary, and I couldn't afford that.
 
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Funny this subject came up today. On Saturday a guy we know got married to what appears to be Ms. Wrong. He was married briefly to my hairstylist 20 years ago and had a son. Marriage ended,I believe,before the boy was even born. Then he remarried and had a daughter but she cheated and then ran off with the guy. So now he meets this Ms.Wrong online and they got married on Saturday. My daughter and SIL were wedding guests(SIL works with him) but also helped serve at the wedding as it was held at our friend`s ranch where they hold weddings. Anyway,daughter was telling me that yesterday two of the guys who were at the wedding came by her house to visit and were saying that this was the first wedding they had ever been to where everyone was talking about how soon the divorce would be happening! Yikes!
 
We married right after high school graduation; couple of months after. We divorced about 5 years later. We had 3 kids. I got full custody. She had a drug problem. She'd started "dabbling" less than a year before we divorced, but drugs took over her life real quick. The kids weren't as important to her. I didn't understand it. I didn't even recognize the depth of her problem until I found out she was sleeping with her drug dealer.

Honestly, I think we might still be married if not for drugs. Except maybe she got into drugs because marriage wasn't as great as she thought it would be, especially with 3 kids coming along in rapid succession.
 
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