I have to start meeting people

[LoveTulips]

So I have not had any friends since 2014, they all died that year and my mom died and one of our kitties died at that time as well. I was working at that time, so I managed without friends, I had/have my husband too to keep me company. But now, I can't take not having any social interaction except with my husband. I have tried to meet people at the Seniors Centre but I think 1) I was too needy, wanting to immediately make close friends 2) I was too choosy. For ex: this person is boring, these people are too cliquey, this person yaks too much about family and wants me to see every photo of her grand children, etc. you know what I mean.

Also I was trying all free groups at the Seniors Centre, trying to save money. I also tried volunteering in their office, well, nope, not doing that again unless I'm paid to work there. Tried being a greeter at the door for the Senior' Center, so, so boring, just sitting and opening the automatic door and saying Hi to people coming in.

I am going to try a different tactic even though it will cost me money. Joining art classes that I would enjoy doing. I'm determined to sign up for a colored pencil class and also determined not to have any expectations about making friends.

It's silly because I spend so much money on online art courses, I may as well spend it on in person art classes. At least it will get me out of the house doing something.

We don't go out anywhere, hubby and I, twice a year for lunch out, no vacations not since 2014 when we took 2 days to Victoria, BC. We don't go out to any shows or anything. Neither of us have friends, Husband could not care less. He's happy to stay at home all the time. He also has asthma and gets tired very easily.

Anyways that's the plan. I'm hoping to sign up this coming Thursday and the class starts Sept. 23rd until Dec. 2nd or something like that.

 

[January]

I hope you enjoy it.

I think joining groups where you enjoy the activity is the way to go, and that is a goal in itself not just a means to make friends.

Volunteering is also good.

Also, I think you have to set aside expectations of perfection from other people - ie if they at first seem boring or yak too much don't write them off. (they might think same of you at first too - and you want them to give you a chance - so work it both ways)

 

[carouselsilver]

I think that's a good plan. If you are doing something that you actually like, you are more relaxed and not so intent upon making friends. Your situation sounds similar to mine, in that my husband likes sitting around the house and if it weren't for my health issues, I would be bothered by that. But since I haven't the energy to do much, here we are!

 

[Aunt Bea]

Good luck!

That’s a tough nut that I haven’t been able to crack.

I have many superficial friends and acquaintances through social media.

All of my close friends but one have died and he lives several states away.

I try to accept it as just another part of aging.