I mildly berated someone and now I feel a little bad.

On another site a Mod would specifically seek out my posts and post a rebuttal or a fact-check. I’d reply “congratulations” only. Lol. I post how I want and try to be mildly entertaining or informative. (Occasionally mixed with nonsense, lol.) Your (Bretrick) posting style is unique and attention-seeking is the last thing I think about it. Post on!
 
Bretrick said:
Because I have never berated anyone on a social network site. I simply ignore them. This time I said something that was out of character for me and I am mad at myself for losing my composure.
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Like Aristotle said, "A friend to all is a friend to none". You don't want to be considered "a friend to none" so you just made it clear that you are genuine and don't fake friendships. I find it sad to see a member being bullied and everyone is afraid to take a side and stand up for what is right because they're afraid of losing a friend, including that bully's circle of friends.
.
 
Paco Dennis said:
As a sociological subject, what would it possibly mean if someone were to start far more threads than others on the forum? What if this person introduced new ideas 10 times as much as taking part in other discussions? It seems to me that @Bretrick starts many new threads but just occasionally takes part in other threads. Is he being selfish? or self-absorbed? or is he expressing the vivid imagination that flows through his mind?

I have wondered about this. There are a couple other people who start threads way more than others, which would happen in any "group" forum. That is to be expected. If one starts a thread it shows they have a particular interest in the subject. Maybe others don't have an interest...just skip on by then. There is a new guy on here lately. @TennVet is posting a bunch of new threads about his interests.

IDK any answers to these questions, but I have noticed a distinct pattern to what others post, about what, the frequency, if it is personal or impersonal, opinions or facts, small talk or serious dialogue, and so many more social interactions. It makes for an interesting "guess" at the persons motives or personality type.? We all wonder about this occasionally. I guess some people will be offended by some of these traits. That too is in the cards.

Here is my story about @Bretrick.. He has led a very eventful life, and has had many challenges, including alcoholism. He is an affectionate guy, with a big heart who allows himself to express his feelings and imagination and curiosities. He lives in an exotic place, with very interesting creatures. Is he a team player? Yea, but he might be the quarterback calling the plays. :) I am no sociologist, so IDK how to use that language to describe forum behavior in such terms.

I don't feel like posting new threads is selfish, but it is coming from a self. In Brets case I find his posts spontaneously imaginative, and very interesting. To each his own...and let the chips fall as they may. :)
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Think as you will, I didn't come to this forum for anything other than an outlet of my thoughts and exposure to the thoughts of others. I have an active mind and an inquisitive nature. If no one ever put forth new thought where would this world be?
 
TennVet said:
Think as you will, I didn't come to this forum for anything other than an outlet of my thoughts and exposure to the thoughts of others. I have an active mind and an inquisitive nature. If no one ever put forth new thought where would this world be?
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absolutely correct.... this would become a very staid place if we had no new members and new input, ..I for one enjoy your posts !
 
Remy said:
Don't feel bad @Bretrick I too feel bad if I say something sometimes. It's just not how I am, I don't stick up for myself all that much.

I had someone on a site tell me to kill myself once. A total idiotic tool but those people can be dangerous on the internet to very vulnerable people.
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I am definitely over it now. He simply riled me and that is the very first time I arced up a little.
 
Bretrick said:
On another site a guy said I post too much and that I am only seeking attention.
This guy often makes negative remarks to posters, trying to belittle them.
My response to him was - Stop it. You are such a negative person.
Nothing else, just that.
It is the most negative thing I have ever said to anyone, on any site.
He has not responded as yet and if he does I will completely ignore him.
Though I feel a little bad, I will not lose any sleep tonight.
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Keep in mind there is no such thing as a negative person. The negativity you perceive is created by you. It is your choice to perceive it as a negative thing.
 
Lara said:
Like Aristotle said, "A friend to all is a friend to none". You don't want to be considered "a friend to none" so you just made it clear that you are genuine and don't fake friendships. I find it sad to see a member being bullied and everyone is afraid to take a side and stand up for what is right because they're afraid of losing a friend, including that bully's circle of friends.
.
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This conversation reminds me of an I Love Lucy episode. That's where it's near to Lucy's birthday and she hasn't heard any whispers about anything for her birthday being planned and she starts feeling sorry for herself and feels like she really doesn't have any friends anymore, including her husband Ricky.

So she decides to join a group called "The Friends of the Friendless." And the group goes marching down the road to Ricky's Night Cub where he sings and works as the leader of his band. And when Lucy and the group march in, they find the place all set up for a birthday party.

I love the I Love Lucy show. I subscribed to Columbia House where I received an I Love Lucy video tape every couple of months. My plan was to save them to watch after I retired. Exciting retirement plan, no? Columbia house ran out of the last few tapes. That was no problem because they eventually came out with the entire episodes in DVD format. I wish I had known that sooner. :rolleyes:
 
jpstrap said:
Keep in mind there is no such thing as a negative person. The negativity you perceive is created by you. It is your choice to perceive it as a negative thing.
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My view is that all "persons" are created with negativity and positivity because it's obvious we have a planet of good and evil, and we're all created with the ability to make our own choices for one or the other.

I'm meeting you for the first time jpstrap so I'm sorry to start out disagreeing. I don't want to appear too negative ;) Welcome :giggle:
 
Lara said:
My view is that all "persons" are created with negativity and positivity because it's obvious we have a planet of good and evil, and we're all created with the ability to make our own choices for one or the other.

I'm meeting you for the first time jpstrap so I'm sorry to start out disagreeing. I don't want to appear too negative ;) Welcome :giggle:
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It's my pleasure in meeting you Lara. I do not see you as being negative, because I choose to see your comment as positive. See how easy it is?
 
jpstrap said:
Keep in mind there is no such thing as a negative person. The negativity you perceive is created by you. It is your choice to perceive it as a negative thing.
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not really... I agree that reading a bunch of text can be taken in a negative way depending how one reads it... which where emoticons come into their own.... but when someone tells you to F yourself... that's not the receivers negativity....
 
hollydolly said:
not really... I agree that reading a bunch of text can be taken in a negative way depending how one reads it... which where emoticons come into their own.... but when someone tells you to F yourself... that's not the receivers negativity....
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I understand what you are saying. Believe me I have been confronted more than once with comments such as you described. But....I am still free to interpret (perceive) the words directed at me in whatever tone of meaning I choose. If "F...you" is thrown at me I could warn the speaker to stop being so disagreeable, only to find out the speaker was only kidding around and therefore he/she apologizes. In such a case I chose to interpret the words incorrectly. The intent of the speaker was misinterpreted by me willfully. The negativity I perceived was created by me.

If the speaker did in fact intend the words to be threatening or aggressive or insulting , I am still free to interpret the tone of meaning. I am free to accept the intent as insulting or threatening, or I may choose to ignore the intention completely. I may create a negative interpretation or a neutral interpretation. The meaning of the tone is mine to choose. My perceptions are created by me. I may view this speaker as being negative or neutralize the negativity by perceiving him/her as irrelevant.

I know I do not think the way most people do, but my way of thinking has served me well so far, so I'll stick with it. So when someone calls me negative or anti-social or tells me to F myself or some such thing, I immediately neutralize the intent by perceiving that person as irrelevant and not worth my attention. The person then becomes (in my mind) not negative, but simply irrelevant. The intention has lost it's meaning because the receiver has created a meaning which overrides the intended meaning.
 

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