I need advice/help with question about son

Pepper said:
I wish. I can't afford it. But for you who can, what a wonderful thing to do!
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Truth be told I can't afford it either but I figure what the hell, I can't take it with me, might as well enjoy it with my son. He is going to get what is left anyway!!
 
After reading all four pages on this topic, it reminded me of how my dad reacted one Mother's Day. My mother, my daughter, and I made plans to go out to brunch on Mother's Day and my dad assumed he was going too. We said, sorry, it was for us ladies only...Mother's Day, duh! Long story short, he got all offended and pouted like a 5 year old. No exaggeration.

He got over it, of course, but we didn't do that again. Even though he acted like a child we didn't want him to feel offended again. Mother's Day was at home from then on!

So, my advice @Blessed is go ahead and try to get some alone time with your son. If it makes waves, so be it. DIL will get over it eventually and you can try something different next time.
 

I don't seen anything wrong with time alone with your son. After reading your first post twice, it dawned on me that you are wanting what your DIL's mother already has so there shouldn't be a problem unless it doesn't sit well with that other side of the family. If they are normal reasonable people, they would understand. If they are not, then there is a problem. And that you will have to decide how to deal with. All parties should be in agreement, but they may not be. If they are not, something sounds haywire. It may be something to discuss with the entire "clan."
 
Is it possible to announce and start a "new tradition"? Plan a mother/son lunch or dinner periodically, maybe every 6 weeks.
Because everyone is busy, getting older, and unless it is planned, it won't happen.

It sounds like there is some underlying friction. My son and I used to have lunch often. My DIL would say, yes, please take him for a while, can he stay with you for 3 days? In jest.
 
@Blessed Several times, you've asked what's so wrong or terrible about your idea. You seem to think that someone would take it the wrong way. Who? Why?

Why can't you invite your son and specify, "Just the two of us"? There are all kinds of things a mother might want to discuss with her son in private, e.g., health or finances. Even if it's just shooting the breeze, no one should have a problem with it.

Sorry, I don't see what the problem is. I have had people bring someone else when I really wanted a one-on-one. But it was my own fault for not being clear.
 
Maybe you should go to your DIL and say that you would like to have a lunch with just your son every month (or whatever) and would she take offense to that.
In fact you'd like to have (or continue) to have a lunch with both of them on a regular basis but you feel you want to rebond by having a mother/son day once in a while.
I think most DILs would encourage that with their blessing.
 
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