I started a thread last year asking opionions on refinancing...Thank goodness I did not do it.

L

Ladybj

Live, Laugh and Love
Location
Somewhere in the USA
I am a bit heated with my hus right about now and have to make changes at this stage in my life. Unbeknown to be, my hus started bankruptcy procedures a few days ago. He did not want to tell me but he did. I would have rather he told me he had an affair. Not sure which one is worst. What he did was Financial Infidelity. Change is scary as heck but in some cases, necessary. I don't think there will be any change to his spending disease. I have no doubt, I will be AOK. I'm just mad as He#$. I wonder how he would feel if I told him I am having an affair???? Not going down that route...two wrongs don't make a right. I just don't know how to handle this. Not his first time filing - 4th time (we did a total of two together), this will be his 4th time. And he is planning on retiring next year...REALLY!!!!! He will be locked in bankruptcy for about 7-8 years. He feels horrible but to me, not horrible enough.
 

That really sucks to be blindsided like that, but yes, vent all you want, we'll understand.
 

I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone. Like I'm being punk'd (I think that's the name of the show) and the cameras will come out soon. Thanks for allowing me to vent guys... much appreciated. This is sooooo unfair. I know its not about me but can't help feeling what the he#$ did I do to deserve this. I've always tried best I can. Not perfect by no means but I tried. I have empathy and compassion in my heart. DAMN!!!! Maybe if I was a non-caring B%$#h I would be able to handle it better.
 
Ladybj said:
Thanks Nathan. Had financial counseling more than once. He is not open to counseling. I have been in counseling on and off for several years. I'm not open to marriage counseling until he seeks individual counseling.
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Just so you know: I'm not judging, I've been in a marriage where both financial and marital infidelity took place[long story].
 
Nathan said:
Just so you know: I'm not judging, I've been in a marriage where both financial and marital infidelity took place[long story].
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WOW Nathan... I can not imagine. That's like a double dose....whewwww. Hopefully one person did not do both. I think I can take it a little better if I caused infidelity and his was financial infidelity. However, if that's the case and neither one of us is willing to get help..time for the D word. And I don't mean Daisies :ROFLMAO:
 
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