Investigation into a diary.

PeppermintPatty said:
I’m so very sorry. What a horrible experience to go through. I DO understand not seeing her after the stroke. She was gone before her body died. That makes sense. You must really miss her still. Do you have friends or relatives to talk to?
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My daughter and I went to the hospital every day. I had to make medical decisions like everyone does when they are in that situation. i had family fly out from different areas of the country. I wasn't eating in the beginning.

My first meal was after family got here.

They took me to my favorite Mexican food place here and once the food was set in front of me I couldn't resist. Those were the early days of this. The really hard days. I've said before " time was my healer. " I had so much on my plate in the beginning I didn't have a lot of grieving time or better said I think, not a lot of time to grieve. I had to grieve as I took care of things that needed to be taking care of.

" really miss her " missing now is different then missing in the beginning. She wouldn't have wanted me to stay there in the " really miss her " state anymore than I would have wanted her to stay there in that state. We loved each other and love always wants the best for the one they love, always. :)
 

Calboybob said:
Thank you for condolences. No it wasn't expected and no she wasn't ill. She was healthier than I was or am. She was 72, had just had her 72nd birthday. She had gone to the store that day. Drove herself. I was at the door when she headed out. I told her it was a beautiful day and she said it was " gorgeous ". The rest of the day was normal stuff until......She had a stroke. She fell in the kitchen and I was in another room and I said " are you alright? no answer so I said it again.......she said no. The was the last word she spoke to me except for in dreams I've had since. That was on Feb 1, 2025. She passed on Feb. 4, 2025. :)
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Very sorry, Bob.😥
Thanks for sharing, your story and hers.
 
Calboybob said:
My daughter and I went to the hospital every day. I had to make medical decisions like everyone does when they are in that situation. i had family fly out from different areas of the country. I wasn't eating in the beginning.

My first meal was after family got here.

They took me to my favorite Mexican food place here and once the food was set in front of me I couldn't resist. Those were the early days of this. The really hard days. I've said before " time was my healer. " I had so much on my plate in the beginning I didn't have a lot of grieving time or better said I think, not a lot of time to grieve. I had to grieve as I took care of things that needed to be taking care of.

" really miss her " missing now is different then missing in the beginning. She wouldn't have wanted me to stay there in the " really miss her " state anymore than I would have wanted her to stay there in that state. We loved each other and love always wants the best for the one they love, always. :)
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No! I doubt your wife would have wanted you to be forever miserable due to her passing. Good thing you had family to care for you when you needed it. They clearly helped you.
I was going to ask if you had any children and clearly you do. You have a daughter.

You must be so grateful that you have family around to help you when you need them.

Do you have any Hobbies?
What do you do in your spare time?
Do you have a house to care for?
 
Kaila said:
Very sorry, Bob.😥
Thanks for sharing, your story and hers.
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Well I just want to say this. That was a kind of end to a story that was in the making from the beginning of time. I say " kind of an end " because I believe the story continues. I believe there is life on the other side. How it works over there I've yet to learn. While I've shared the " end " of the story, there is 40+ years of untold. But we aren't in a hurry right? Lets have some fun. Life is to short not to. :)
 
PeppermintPatty said:
No! I doubt your wife would have wanted you to be forever miserable due to her passing. Good thing you had family to care for you when you needed it. They clearly helped you.
I was going to ask if you had any children and clearly you do. You have a daughter.

You must be so grateful that you have family around to help you when you need them.

Do you have any Hobbies?
What do you do in your spare time?
Do you have a house to care for?
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All good questions. :)
 
Calboybob said:
All good questions. :)
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The House: Our home is or/was Community Property when my wife passed. California is a community property state. What that means is that half the house belonged to my late Wife even after she passed. Since she passed intestate ( without a will ) I had to file a Spousal Property Petition with the court. It is a kind of express probate. It took a couple of months instead of years. I now own the property. So yes I have a house to take care of for now. :)
 
Calboybob said:
The House: Our home is or/was Community Property when my wife passed. California is a community property state. What that means is that half the house belonged to my late Wife even after she passed. Since she passed intestate ( without a will ) I had to file a Spousal Property Petition with the court. It is a kind of express probate. It took a couple of months instead of years. I now own the property. So yes I have a house to take care of for now. :)
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Calboybob said:
All good questions. :)
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As far as my spare time, I could give you a laundry list of things I have to do. I do all the household chores. ie: dishes, laundry, trash take out, bill paying, banking, investing, but it's been mainly legal matters since she passed. Taxes, CMA, property taxes, home owners ins canceled after she passed and in Ca. it's a nightmare to find that now. But I did. Had to deal with med bills from her hospital stay. Dealing heath ins. company and providers.

So you could say I might find some spare time in but it's used to figure out my next step in dealing with all that and more. Finally got the utilities name changed. Two out of the four required death certificates.

Hobbies? that's just a funny word to me. sorry. :)
 
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