Is it possible to trust again after severe betrayal?

[fuzzybuddy]

I can't speak for others, but as for me- once trust is gone- it's take a hike. And I have absolutely no problem in severing any relationship. I've never went around telling anybody that's how I am, but most of my friends seem to know that's me. If the trust is gone, so are you.

 

[Jan14]

Hey Jan, sorry this happened to you. However as others have said it is not your fault, being trusting of a spouse is not only good, but necessary. You were just unfortunate to have chosen the wrong one. I don't know that there is anyway you could have known ahead of time, its hard.

However as we get older I think it is easier, we all now have "track records" that can be checked out. All your ex's new lady friends need do is ask you... Hope you don't let this stop you from pursuing a new relationship, if that is what you want.

Yep!

Thank you for the kind words. It’s a hard time I’m going thru right now because he has a new woman and they are buying my business (used to be ours, I got thru divorce). So I’m showing her the ropes so to speak. She’s sweet, but I know how he is. I’m not going to interfere. I know the truth will come out. We are in a small town. I am thankful it’s “not my problem”. He is a wonderful person and helps me out, and I help him too. We still have love for each other. He just has a problem. It is nice to have encouragement from others. I do believe there are good honest people out there. I realize affairs happen and I could forgive that but his problem is not one I can live with.

 

[Jan14]

Can't help you here on the cheating problem. I have been married twice and my wife never cheated and I never cheated. I do know something about trust. Trust is a wonderful thing between a couple; however, once it is lost or destroyed it is very hard and sometimes impossible to regain. No matter how sorry your partner now seems, there will always be a concern that this partner will pull the same stunt again.

If you are serious in finding someone in your life, might I suggest dating. Yes, the old fashioned and the slow kind. It takes time to find out what your new friend is really like. The worse thing is to rush into a relationship.

Thanks for the advise. So nice to hear that you have a good relationship. It is to be cherished.

 

[officerripley]

Jan, I am so sorry you've had to go through this. I had (both are dead now) two male family members who were like your ex; one sounded identical to your ex and the other was a lesser version. So my heart goes out to you.