Is there anything for which you can not forgive yourself or for which you can not forgive someone else?

Serenity4321

Serenity4321

Senior Member
Location
Florida
I hope not. There used to be some things I thought were unforgivable but the older I became the more I realized that is not a good or necessary way to think or live. Sadly I still know a few people who can not let go of things that happened to them.
 

I have something really important to say about forgiveness, so I'm putting it in bold type!

Your thought plus your emotions create your personal energy field. When you let these feelings go, you are creating your positive energy.
To hold fear, hate, resentment and animosity, you are only causing yourself pain.

Forget the past. Forgive everyone in your past who has ever harmed you. Why, if you can choose your moods, would you choose to feel bad?
Let all the feelings of animosity lift and the new you, free from hate , will emerge. Go beyond the letting goof ill will. Bless this soul so his soul will feeel the blessing. When this is done, much joy will come to you and you have opened your heart to real magic in your life!
 
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I must let it all go, only because there are no do-overs. I can't condemn myself because I can't change the past.

I can't condemn those others as I tried and tried and tried and have exhausted the possibilities. It's up to them and they won't budge.

For those things that bother me in the present--I can't control the acts of others.

I may have not fully forgiven but I've gotten real good at forgetting.
 
When I was very young my Dad taught me that if someone hurt me that it was their problem, not mine and to just walk away and forget them. He always told me I was the best person and not to dwell on what others do to me. I listened to him many times over the years and I've never missed any of the people who did me wrong.
 
Sassycakes said:
When I was very young my Dad taught me that if someone hurt me that it was their problem, not mine and to just walk away and forget them. He always told me I was the best person and not to dwell on what others do to me. I listened to him many times over the years and I've never missed any of the people who did me wrong.
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what if those people who hurt you badly were members of your own family, or people you were likely to have to interact with in life...how would you cope with that sassy ?
 
Pepper said:
In my cultural background we are taught to forgive if the one who harmed you genuinely expresses their wrong and their sorrow at their act. Then, forgiving is optional but is usually given if the "perp" is sincere.
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what if they're not contrite at all.. would you still forgive.. ( this is not just aimed at pepper)... to anyone who wishes to answer...
 
As for forgiving myself, I feel that I did the best I could at that time in a given situation. I wish I could take some things back, but that's not possible so some remorse lingers.

As for forgiving others, it depends on who the others are and again, the situation at the time. Empathy plays a part. Bitterness will eat you up inside so I don't hold on to it once the initial pain has subsided.
 
IMO, you can only forgive someone if they show remorse. Revenge is the alternative in that case so it doesn't eat you alive.

I'm still resentful of things people have done to me, but the main perpetrator is dead, so there's that. And some good came from other cases. I was able to make lemonade from some of the lemons life handed me. Things could have been better in my life, but they could have been worse, too.
 
hollydolly said:
what if those people who hurt you badly were members of your own family, or people you were likely to have to interact with in life...how would you cope with that sassy ?
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It's funny that you mentioned this now. My dad's family hated my Mom, brother, sister, and me. We still visited them often.
None of my cousins on that side of the family were allowed to talk to us, even my cousin that lived around the corner from us. We just tolerated it so as not to upset my dad. He said he didn't want to remain friends with them and none of us had to visit them and he would even avoid them. My mom said No we could handle it and we did.
 
funsearcher! said:
Forgive even if they don't apologize or act sorry. Forgiveness is for Your peace--carrying around anger and bitterness is not good for your health.
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But whatever you do, don't tell them (or tell anybody who'd tell them) that you forgive them; you're likely to hear, "What?! You FORGIVE me?! The nerve! I've never done anything wrong in my life! YOU're the one who needs to be forgiven, etc. etc." Better to keep your forgiveness to yourself.
 
funsearcher! said:
Forgive even if they don't apologize or act sorry. Forgiveness is for Your peace--carrying around anger and bitterness is not good for your health.
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I'm not carrying anger or bitterness, I have no feelings for them whatsoever.. once it was sheer hatred.. then it became complete indifference as tho' they never existed.. ..that said, unless you've walked a mile in someone's shoes, you can't tell them how to feel( regardless of how well meaning it may be)
 
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