Is there anything for which you still can not forgive yourself or someone else?

Thank you everyone for your comments. I am sad to hear many still have not been able to come to terms with hurt and betrayals...I know for me I let go and forgave for 2 reasons. One I convinced myself they really were doing the best they could at that time in their lives with what they then knew. Two .. I convinced myself my hurt is actually hurting me more than anyone else. It is not always easy to forgive but IMO it is worth the effort and the rewards are great.I hope I am not sounding preachy..my apologies if I am:unsure:
 

Pepper said:
It's too late not to forgive. I had a vision. Yes, I did..........of a mystical, whimsical, mischievous person, looking devilish but Not evil. He snapped his fingers while he said "Time's up." Fade to nothing, like the final moment of The Sopranos.

So. It's too late now not to forgive. So I will.
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Pepper, I believe in visions :) I have never had one but I am happy others have and I believe those who say they do. Perhaps someday I will too🤗..I have had a few experiences which I and others can not explain but I don't know if they qualify as visions.
 
Serenity4321 said:
Thank you everyone for your comments. I am sad to hear many still have not been able to come to terms with hurt and betrayals...I know for me I let go and forgave for 2 reasons. One I convinced myself they really were doing the best they could at that time in their lives with what they then knew. Two .. I convinced myself my hurt is actually hurting me more than anyone else. It is not always easy to forgive but IMO it is worth the effort and the rewards are great.I hope I am not sounding preachy..my apologies if I am:unsure:
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Very true: "my hurt is actually hurting me more than anyone else." And beyond hurt and betrayals, some are abused and victimized. The victimizers and abusers were not "doing the best they could at that time in their lives with what they then knew," except in the sense that they did their best to intentionally inflict harm.

But for most others, your sentiments have great merit and I appreciate the non-preachy approach. Thank you.
 

What I'm finding from this thread is that a lot of people have had bad experiences when I sometimes thought it was only me. Good to see I am not alone. As I've gotten older and hopefully wiser, I've learned to unload all that baggage and focus on what future I have left, but still I have to remind my self.
 
Serenity4321 said:
Thank you everyone for your comments. I am sad to hear many still have not been able to come to terms with hurt and betrayals...I know for me I let go and forgave for 2 reasons. One I convinced myself they really were doing the best they could at that time in their lives with what they then knew. Two .. I convinced myself my hurt is actually hurting me more than anyone else. It is not always easy to forgive but IMO it is worth the effort and the rewards are great.I hope I am not sounding preachy..my apologies if I am:unsure:
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For some of us the hurt and betrayals are very recent, or ongoing, can't shake those off so easily :( I wish it were possible
 
A common misconception is that if people don't forgive those who hurt them, they are hurting themselves by obsessing about it.
Not true at all. One can forget without forgiving. Unless someone mentions or asks about those who I won't forgive, they are completely out of my thoughts; as if they never existed. And after the conversation, they are completely forgotten again.
 
hollydolly said:
For some of us the hurt and betrayals are very recent, or ongoing, can't shake those off so easily :( I wish it were possible
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I understand and do not mean to minimize anyone's pain. Until we are in another person's shoes we do not know how we would react...so I just want to say I am sorry you have had hurtful experiences. 🌹
 
win231 said:
A common misconception is that if people don't forgive those who hurt them, they are hurting themselves by obsessing about it.
Not true at all. One can forget without forgiving. Unless someone mentions or asks about those who I won't forgive, they are completely out of my thoughts; as if they never existed. And after the conversation, they are completely forgotten again.
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Thank you...I guess we are all different. For me, unforgiveness meant whenever I thought of the person or situation I would react emotionally though not necessarily obsessing over it....
 
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