Love Life

bobcat

bobcat

Well-known Member
Location
Northern Calif
(Assuming you are single)
If you met someone at this stage of your life that you were attracted to and enjoyed spending time with, which of the following would you prefer:
To continue living alone and just be friends
To continue living alone, keep your independence, and just go on dates
To move in together as a couple
To get married

(Reasons - If you want to share?)
 

I would eat better if I had someone to cook for. I have a terrible diet, last night had cookies and ice cream for dinner. My husband loved my cooking. I think move in together.

It's not going to happen. I am in poor health. I'd love a companion to wake up to and go to sleep with, and talk over decisions; someone to drag to gatherings with.

On the other hand...................IDK, just pretending.
 
Pepper said:
I would eat better if I had someone to cook for. I have a terrible diet, last night had cookies and ice cream for dinner. My husband loved my cooking. I think move in together.

It's not going to happen. I am in poor health. I'd love a companion to wake up to and go to sleep with, and talk over decisions; someone to drag to gatherings with.

On the other hand...................IDK, just pretending.
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Yeah, the cookies and ice cream thing probably doesn't help the poor health, but then again, no judgment here. I get the cooking thing though. I just cook a good sized meal, freeze the leftovers, and microwave the portions somewhere down the road. It works for me anyway. Thanks for sharing.
 
bobcat48 said:
Yeah, the cookies and ice cream thing probably doesn't help the poor health, but then again, no judgment here.
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Yes bob, I suffer from ennui! This definitely affects my health. Sometimes I have an actual sandwich! Actually, I'm disinterested in eating; barely eat. Sure that affects the poor health too. I do better when I'm with family.

I made up my mind. If given the opportunity, move in! It will give me a reason to go out more, just to occasionally get away from the lucky man! And I'd make sure he feels lucky! Gotta like him alot, however, not just any dude would do.
 
My mother died when she and my father were 72. From about age 73 to 83 he had a very nice relationship with a woman. He would take her out to eat a few times a week, she would cook dinner for him at her house at least once a week. They often went together to lunch and things like art festivals. They talked on the phone every evening around bedtime and I think they might have had a morning call, too. It seems ideal to me.
 
I have been in a relationship for 5 years now with a very nice guy. He lives in his own home 25 miles away in the country. I live in an apartment downtown in a small city. He has noisy dogs (and had 2 parrots but they have passed on since) and I have a very quiet house bunny. He takes me shopping, out to eat, to car shows, to my appointments, etc. We talk on the phone first thing in the morning and just before we go to bed and many times in between through out the day.

I told him right from the start that I would never marry nor live with anyone again. He accepted that and at times I think he needs a woman to help him in his home but he has an aide now so that works out better for us. It is the best relationship I have ever had.
 
IMO, I would probably live alone, keep my independence and just be friends.

One marriage for 50+ years, supporting him through chemo & radiation and helping him gain his strength back....there isn't anyone I would choose to replace him in the future.
 
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I'm just coming up to 2 years without my husband.. he left..he didn't die, but it was just as much a shock as if he had died.. and it's taken me a long time to get over it..

I have decided I couldn't live with anyone again.. at least not unless it was a house big enough for us both to have enough personal space when we want it..

The answer to the question for me at this juncture would be, live alone, and go on dates . I would like my own space for a few days.. and be able to enjoy a relationship by looking forward to seeing him on a day or 2 a week... I don't want to get into that Familiarity breeds contempt situation... by spending 24/7 with someone
 
hollydolly said:
I'm just coming up to 2 years without my husband.. he left..he didn't die, but it was just as much a shock as if he had died.. and it's taken me a long time to get over it..

I have decided I couldn't live with anyone again.. at least not unless it was a house big enough for us both to have enough personal space when we want it..

The answer to the question for me at this juncture would be, live alone, and go on dates . I would like my own space for a few days.. and be able to enjoy a relationship by looking forward to seeing him on a day or 2 a week... I don't want to get into that Familiarity breeds contempt situation... by spending 24/7 with someone
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well thats blown that,was gonna ask you to come to the flicks with me,oh well,lol
 
Pepper said:
Yes bob, I suffer from ennui! This definitely affects my health. Sometimes I have an actual sandwich! Actually, I'm disinterested in eating; barely eat. Sure that affects the poor health too. I do better when I'm with family.

I made up my mind. If given the opportunity, move in! It will give me a reason to go out more, just to occasionally get away from the lucky man! And I'd make sure he feels lucky! Gotta like him alot, however, not just any dude would do.
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Makes sense. I guess living alone can have downsides, but so can living together. Balance in everything.
 
It
Della said:
My mother died when she and my father were 72. From about age 73 to 83 he had a very nice relationship with a woman. He would take her out to eat a few times a week, she would cook dinner for him at her house at least once a week. They often went together to lunch and things like art festivals. They talked on the phone every evening around bedtime and I think they might have had a morning call, too. It seems ideal to me.
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Sounds sweet, and it obviously worked well for them.
 
katlupe said:
I have been in a relationship for 5 years now with a very nice guy. He lives in his own home 25 miles away in the country. I live in an apartment downtown in a small city. He has noisy dogs (and had 2 parrots but they have passed on since) and I have a very quiet house bunny. He takes me shopping, out to eat, to car shows, to my appointments, etc. We talk on the phone first thing in the morning and just before we go to bed and many times in between through out the day.

I told him right from the start that I would never marry nor live with anyone again. He accepted that and at times I think he needs a woman to help him in his home but he has an aide now so that works out better for us. It is the best relationship I have ever had.
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Congrats ... it sounds like a good recipe
 
Gaer said:
Don't know. Open to whatever opportunities present themselves. Hahahaha!
Happy alone. Probably happier in an intimate, loving relationship but as @Pepper said,
"not just any dude would do". I'd have to be crazy in love with the guy to live with him. Not lookin.
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Yeah, it's better to be alone than to be with someone who doesn't deserve you.
 
hollydolly said:
I'm just coming up to 2 years without my husband.. he left..he didn't die, but it was just as much a shock as if he had died.. and it's taken me a long time to get over it..

I have decided I couldn't live with anyone again.. at least not unless it was a house big enough for us both to have enough personal space when we want it..

The answer to the question for me at this juncture would be, live alone, and go on dates . I would like my own space for a few days.. and be able to enjoy a relationship by looking forward to seeing him on a day or 2 a week... I don't want to get into that Familiarity breeds contempt situation... by spending 24/7 with someone
Click to expand...
That does seem to be the consensus. Most enjoy their space, privacy, and independence, but would also welcome dating.
 
My mom had a great relationship with her gentleman friend for several years before his death.

He lived in a high-rise beach-front condo and she lived in the woods on a creek.

He'd come over every night, she'd fix dinner, they'd have a Scotch or two and retire. In the morning, she'd fix breakfast and pack him a lunch and He'd go home to watch his TV shows all day (she wouldn't allow a TV in her house). That evening, he'd be back. He'd also frequently take her out for fine dining and he gave her an extremely generous amount of money to buy the food, etc.

Saturdays and Sundays, he usually spent at his son's house as they were all big sports fans and loved to watch the games on a big screen TV.

This arrangement gave her her days and weekends to spend with her large amount of friends or however she wanted.

It was an ideal arrangement until he died.
 
After my divorce in 2016, being on my own was a breath of fresh air.
Was not looking for a companion……then, out of the blue, a relationship was developing…..after just over 2 years of that…..I got dumped.
Took a very long time to get over that…..we hadn’t got to the point of living together.
I then came to the reality that…..I don’t need to be with someone to be happy…..perfectly happy as I am now.
I will let someone in for a good friendship, sharing, spending time with, but not to move in.
 
I would like to live with someone......it gets old being alone IMO.
as both late in life the kids etc could be an issue ....
Some kids do not like parents with another person ....... the blended family issues etc ......
so dating and living separate may work best.
 
Divorced first husband (children's father) and widowed by 2nd husband.

With husband #2, I INSISTED on a pre-nuptial agreement (to protect my assets and to protect his pension.) After 2nd husband's death, the prenuptial agreement entitled me to his pension (being his survivor).
 

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