Marriage

April 1969. We had two dates and then we each split for different coasts. The next time we saw each other was a couple of days before our wedding. The marriage lasted for 37 years until he died.
I love that story Jujube. How long was it before you married after just two dates? Do you have a pile of love letters? Now days, nobody gets or sends old fashioned love letters. What a shame. I can't imagine the same kind of romance with emails.
 

grahamg

Senior Member
I knew Wolfman Jack didn’t die.
On my one trip to the USA many moons ago, (the trip i never stop going on about, who knows, one day might make it back?), I was called "Wolfman" by someone I met on the street whilst completely lost in the early hours of the morning, so now I know who he was. :giggle: .

I decided my best defence was not to speak, and keep my hand in a jacket pocket to indicate I might be armed, (so relieved to reach the safety of an all night cafe in Las Vegas, and the owner guessed my predicament and ordered a cab before I asked him to, "now that's service. (y):);) !).
 

grahamg

Senior Member
Marriage isn't for the faint of heart. It's not always pretty. That part about "for richer or poorer" & "in sickness and in health" is in the vows for a reason! It's Happily Married Husband and Wife Week. If your spouse is still your best friend, works extremely hard, has been with you through triumphs and tragedies, has loved you even when you're at your worst and is someone you're proud to be married to, reply with the date and year you were married.
Sept 14, 1963
I hope this adds to your thread, because I came across this website discussing marriage whilst searching for copies of papers on the views of Akira Morita, a Japanese professor who contributed to a world congress on children and young people some years ago, (he's quoted in the article I'm copying here as you will see).

(apologies, its quite long and involved, and argues against "No fault divorce" amongst other things):

Quote:
"Yenor maintains that both the erstwhile defenders and the attackers of the family shared presuppositions, specifically an overemphasis on narrow understandings of individualism and contractualism as the sine qua non of marriage. As these notions have manifested themselves in laws and social practices increasingly familiar on the American scene, the process confirms that, indeed, ideas have consequences. These consequence-laden ideas include the contingent nature of marriage codified in the no-fault divorce regime as well as the prevalence of commitment-lite non-marital cohabitation, arrangements in which parties can leave at will without even the legal formalities that still attend divorce. Tragically, the formative ideas of our time also include those making commodities out of children, many of whom—with the abandonment of marriage as the normative prelude to childbearing—are now reduced to the status of a lifestyle choice of adults aided by technological innovations and an accommodating legal system.

Yenor’s proposes a response to this fatal flaw in his closing chapter. He explains: “Defending marriage and family life demands that we expose the intellectual extremism in these partial conceptions of consent.” This means facing squarely what the institution of marriage has become:

Modern advocates of autonomy and personal independence distort the satisfactions of marriage into personal satisfactions. They underestimate how genuinely satisfying marital love creates mutual dependence that limits human autonomy and fail to see how marriage and family life are satisfying because they involve this love and dependence.

Standing in opposition to this reductionist account, the Boise State scholar offers a fuller appreciation for what marriage must entail:

Lovers are dependent on a beloved, and unified family life necessarily entails a range of dependencies. Instead of denying that marriage and family life involve dependencies, I would acknowledge and embrace that reality. Family life entails the dependencies of love. . . . Love is “oppressive” (if that is the right word) or dependency-making; it makes claims on our being; it involves changing our identity; it points to our lack of self-sufficiency. It [the characterization of marriage as oppressive] is false, however, in that love’s chains are neither arbitrary social constructions, nor unchosen, nor unworthy of choosing. (emphasis added)

Sounding like Jennifer Roback Morse in Love and Economics (2001), Yenor claims that while “marriage is founded in consent; it forms a loving, mutually dependent relation that supersedes the point of view of contracts.” Or as F. H. Bradley put it: “Marriage is a contract, a contract to pass out of the sphere of contract.” To the degree that Americans have forgotten this richer understanding and embraced a purely contingent notion of marriage, they have created, according to legal scholar Bruce Hafen, a “waning of belonging” which ignores, in Akira Morita’s words, “the organic correlations between autonomy and dependence, which lies at the heart of human existence.”

http://familyinamerica.org/journals/spring-2012/generals-who-started-war-family/#.X5CMSYhKhPY
 

Kadee46

Well-known Member
Location
South Australia
We have dancing friends who have children the same age as us ....they were married on Feb 9th 1946 ..so coming up 75 years in Feb ....they still attend dancing 3 days a weeks it keeps them healthy and active

I took this photo last month for her 96th Birthday . ( He’s was 97 in August ) 5E0D7E29-8B88-4CAA-A443-BF74885C6D7C.jpeg

We swap a dance with them ...they are good dancers
 
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Duster

Member
Location
Deep South, US
We've been married twice to each other after a 2 year divorce between the two weddings. We married young 18 and 20 the first time June 8, 1974. Family members interfered with our marriage from that day on. We split December 29, 1998. The divorce didn't work out and we spent a lot of time together. I moved out of my apartment and back home 6 months later. We remarried at the courthouse on December 28, 2000. We try harder now, because we know what it is to lose one another.

To those who don't know me, I'm battling endometrial cancer and am currently going through chemo to shrink the tumors so that they can do surgery.

One day I said to my husband, "This isn't fair to you. You never signed up for all this".

He said, "Yes, I did sign up for it when I made those promises~For Richer, For Poorer, In Sickness, and In Health, Till Death Do Us Part. I'm not going anywhere!" He touched my soul.

He's my Rock. I don't know what would have happened if he hadn't been here for me. I am Blessed.
 

MickaC

Senior Member
Location
Manitoba, Canada
We've been married twice to each other after a 2 year divorce between the two weddings. We married young 18 and 20 the first time June 8, 1974. Family members interfered with our marriage from that day on. We split December 29, 1998. The divorce didn't work out and we spent a lot of time together. I moved out of my apartment and back home 6 months later. We remarried at the courthouse on December 28, 2000. We try harder now, because we know what it is to lose one another.

To those who don't know me, I'm battling endometrial cancer and am currently going through chemo to shrink the tumors so that they can do surgery.

One day I said to my husband, "This isn't fair to you. You never signed up for all this".

He said, "Yes, I did sign up for it when I made those promises~For Richer, For Poorer, In Sickness, and In Health, Till Death Do Us Part. I'm not going anywhere!" He touched my soul.

He's my Rock. I don't know what would have happened if he hadn't been here for me. I am Blessed.
Bless you both.......Best to you for the battle you're having to go through.......I feel the strength you have for eachother.
Take care......both of you.
 

Pinky

Well-known Member
Location
Toronto
We've been married twice to each other after a 2 year divorce between the two weddings. We married young 18 and 20 the first time June 8, 1974. Family members interfered with our marriage from that day on. We split December 29, 1998. The divorce didn't work out and we spent a lot of time together. I moved out of my apartment and back home 6 months later. We remarried at the courthouse on December 28, 2000. We try harder now, because we know what it is to lose one another.

To those who don't know me, I'm battling endometrial cancer and am currently going through chemo to shrink the tumors so that they can do surgery.

One day I said to my husband, "This isn't fair to you. You never signed up for all this".

He said, "Yes, I did sign up for it when I made those promises~For Richer, For Poorer, In Sickness, and In Health, Till Death Do Us Part. I'm not going anywhere!" He touched my soul.

He's my Rock. I don't know what would have happened if he hadn't been here for me. I am Blessed.
@Duster You've got a real keeper .. but, you would have known that all along - as did he, of you.
 


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