Men's Dating Coaching - YouTube

dilettante

dilettante

Well-known Member
Whew, this looks entirely different and hard-headed compared to the advice aimed at women. To start with, instead of 30 minutes of gabbing they tend to be brief, almost terse.

Here is one guy, but they all look pretty similar. Mostly trying to erase the conditioning that became "common wisdom" in the last 40 years.


 

What I am finding as I wade through it, like watching a train wreck in slow motion, is that those with actual psychological credentials, counseling experience, etc. struggle trying to undo the damage of BS philosophies of recent decades. The trick is accomplishing that without being charged with trying to undermine the good changes that have occurred.
 
I find it a little more than ironic that a man is giving "dating" advice to other men (unless they are dating gay men).. Far too many men are in the dark and only see what they want to see or what other men have said they see where women are concerned and probably have less than stellar dating histories themselves. Our upbringing does not encourage really "really getting to know other genders" It. in fact, actually encourages being as different from each other in every aspect as possible. Huge differences do not really support "togetherness"
 
I keep thinking of another one with two women giving advice.

Q: Who makes the first move?
A: The man should do that, and choose and plan the dates.

Q: Splitting the check?
A: The person who did the inviting should pay.
 
dilettante said:
I keep thinking of another one with two women giving advice.

Q: Who makes the first move?
A: The man should do that, and choose and plan the dates.

Q: Splitting the check?
A: The person who did the inviting should pay.
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I remember reading articles exactly like this when I was in high school. By 25 I pretty much had it all internalized. And then by 30-35, wisdom generally takes over and we realize that it doesn't *matter* who makes the first move or pays the check. Remember that old saying, "those who can't do, teach?" I'd love to see the dating track records of these people pretending to be "experts." :giggle:
 
dilettante said:
It was a good example of bad advice. You don't see much of that today.
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Yes... and very old advice... that's what I was saying. I was in high school in the mid 70s and I used to get a magazine through Home Ec class called "Co-Ed." The things you pasted reminded me of things I read there... that advice was antiquated and put me on a memory lane trip. 😁
 
I just want to say that if you're using YouTube "influencers" ... for "advice" to apply to dating for mature adults in their 50s, 60s, 70s etc. I think you'll be disappointed. I've personally known some of these YouTube "celebs" and many basically know nothing and simply sit down and make things up according to what they think their audience will eat up.

Mature dating and a mature relationship is *worlds* different from the advice these millennials put out. We can't make ourselves young again and some of the things these YT channels advise are downright embarrassing. Common sense should always trump advice from people trying to make a buck on social media.
 
It's definitely true that not all the advice given by YouTube "influencers" is applicable to every situation, especially when it comes to mature dating and relationships. The cultural norms, expectations, and life experiences of mature adults are vastly different from those of young millennials. One of the biggest pitfalls of taking advice from these influencers is that they often oversimplify complex issues or make sweeping generalizations that don't account for the nuances and complexities of real-life relationships. It's easy to be seduced by their charisma and slick production values, but it's important to remember that their primary motivation is often to attract views and subscribers, not to offer genuinely helpful advice.

Common sense and personal experience are guides in matters of love and relationships. There's no one-size-fits-all approach to dating, especially when you're over 50. 😊
 
I'm curious which points you feel are flawed.

Most of them describe ways the man can cause problems through neglect of his partner or a misunderstanding of the different priorities and motivations of men and women. It isn't about blame but some of the motivations behind cheating, which makes it easier to see how to avoid setting yourself up for failure.

From my point of view the video provides insight into correct relationship behavior that prevents such problems from arising.

But I do have to concede the point. I simply don't have the vast experience with this that so many of you seem to have. That isn't sarcasm.

In the end, it was just a video that YouTube recommended. I watched it, and I thought it provided useful information. If that information is incorrect I'd like to know what it gets wrong.
 
Ok, here is another one I'd like input on. He seems to make sense, what's wrong with his thesis?


This guy is a licensed psychologist. So he can still be wrong, but it's harder to blow the video off with "influencers, ptui!"
 


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