My ex-Girlfriend Has Died

Been There

Well-known Member
Location
Florida
When I was 11 years old, I met a little blonde haired girl that lived across the street from my Aunt and Uncle. Even at 11, I fell in love. She lived two states away from me, so I only saw her during my visits in the summer. As we grew older, I would dream about her and knew that someday we would marry. My mom and dad died early in my life in an airplane crash, so I went to live with my Aunt and Uncle.

We dated during high school, talked about marriage and having children, but after school, I went to the Naval Academy and then to flight school and finally, I was flying in wars. I kept writing to her and she would write back and then one day, the letters stopped coming. I didn't know what happened, so I called her from my base in Saudi Arabia. She told me that she had fallen in love with another man and didn't know how to tell me. I moved on.

Years later, I learned that her husband had died suddenly of a heart attack at the age of 51. I went to see her and she greeted me with a big hug and kiss. She asked me to take her for a ride. We drove around town for almost an hour and then she decided that we should stop at a park and go for a walk. As we were walking, a man approached us and asked for a dollar to buy a hot dog. I said that I would give him the last ten dollar bill in my pocket. After I gave him the money, he pulled a knife on me and asked for my wallet. I told him OK as I reached around my back. I kept a 9mm inside my waist at my back. I pulled my gun and told him that he had only 3 seconds to drop the knife or his name would be in tomorrow's obituary column. He dropped the knife. I told to start running and not to stop. He took off like a jackrabbit.

My girlfriend grabbed me and wouldn't let go. She was scared beyond belief. She said that he was going to kill me first, then rape and kill her. I had a hard time consoling her. After almost an hour of talking it out, she asked me to take her home, so I did. She wanted me to go inside with her and at her request, we spent the night together. In the morning, she told me that I had to leave. I was left totally confused. I asked her why, but he said that I was just to leave and not return, PLEASE.

I did as she asked. Yesterday, I received a phone call from a mutual friend of ours telling me that she had died. I asked how. He said he didn't know. I am stuck with the question Should I go to the funeral on Friday. I think no, but my heart says yes. Maybe if I go, I will get the answers to the questions that I am seeking.
 

My condolences. The decision for you about the funeral is very personal of course. It's strange that she told you to go with no explanation the last time you saw her. I agree with Pecos, your questions may never be answered, but going to the funeral will assure you have no regrets hanging over your head, and maybe put everything to rest. Good luck.
 

What a heartbreaking story.
Goodness. If it were me and I had that much love for someone, nothing would hold me back from going. I’d need closure. You might not get all the answers you seek but I think you will find a better sense of closure which I truly believe you deserve.
I wish you the best.
 
My condolences. The decision for you about the funeral is very personal of course. It's strange that she told you to go with no explanation the last time you saw her. I agree with Pecos, your questions may never be answered, but going to the funeral will assure you have no regrets hanging over your head, and maybe put everything to rest. Good luck.

I agree with SeaBreeze. Regret can haunt one forever. Me, I'd go...

My grandma would say, 'follow your heart.'
 
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Have you thought of checking the obituaries in the paper where she lives? Sometimes they give the cause of death and names of survivor relatives as well as funeral information. If you could see that it might help with your decision about going to her funeral or not. Always sad to hear that someone who had once been close has passed on.
 
There will only be one funeral for her. If I were in your shoes, I'd go. I'd introduce myself as an old school chum and former neighbor; keep it simple.

And I think there's a pretty good chance you'll find out how she died. Someone is sure to talk about it.
Go. Keep it simple, just as suggested.
 
You have nothing to lose by attending the funeral, & you might get some answers.
By the way, you're a lot more tolerant than I am. If that thug met me, his name would be in the obituary the same day.
 
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