You wrote that his phone is off. If he would have been picked up by the police and taken into custody, or taken to the hospital or morgue and one of those facilities would have his phone in hand, they would have contacted the police in his area and gave them that information. That’s SOP, so as not to worry the relatives and also to “possibly” get more information.The police are sending out inquiries to local hospitals, jails, the morgue. They are following up on a concerning image they found on his computer…an aerial photo of a tall bridge across a river close by, chasing down any reports of sightings of someone on that bridge on foot.
The police who responded were kind. They said that the majority of the investigative work will be done by their investigators, and gave me a number to call to check in progress though they of course will let me know if he shows up in hospital or jail or worse, the morgue. He can also choose to have the police not tell me where he is if he’s found.
Trying to continue with normal routines because there’s nothing I can do to effect a good outcome, and life of course continues to move along in spite of this, but I’m not functioning very well
I am trying so hard to be optimistic @911. I am by nature a very positive, glass half full person. It’s been extremely difficult for me to not catastrophize this situation and envision worst case scenarios. The mystery, the what ifs, the dark possibilities are crowding my thoughts and it’s sometimes impossible to outrun them.People turn off their phone for various reasons, which we don’t have to go into. Too early for all that. I’m sure they issued a BOLO and possibly an APB. If he’s around, he will either show up or the police will find him. I like to be optimistic in these types of issues.
I am sorry to hear this. I know you are doing all you can do, but it's not finding him. Is there any other place, or persons you haven't checked? Any thing you haven't thought of before, or gone out to the regular places he has been at? Pray, pray and pray!!!Son #3, 40 years old, lives in the tiny house on our property. He’s been despondent because his work contract (he’s a teacher, teaches coding) just ended and he hasn’t been able to find other work.
No one has seen or heard from him since Sunday. He’s not in his house. His phone is off. No response to texts or calls obviously. His siblings and brother in law are his best friends so there aren’t a lot of folks to check with. No one ha heard from him. His car is still here.
I filed a missing persons report. The police just left. I am trying so hard not to panic but I’m not doing a very good job.
I understand, Ronni. I really do. When something like this hits home, it becomes personal and as humans, we tend to think the worse. I think he may be taking a break and doesn’t want to be disturbed and that is why he has turned his phone off. I think when people want a break, they should include the family in their decision to do so, so they don’t alarm anyone, but the majority of them don’t.I am trying so hard to be optimistic @911. I am by nature a very positive, glass half full person. It’s been extremely difficult for me to not catastrophize this situation and envision worst case scenarios. The mystery, the what ifs, the dark possibilities are crowding my thoughts and it’s sometimes impossible to outrun them.
@911 its appreciated to have someone with professional background in this area.. thank you for the information you’ve provided to this threadI have been involved in several of these types of people that have gone missing. I am sure the police told you that as an adult, he has the right to leave and disappear at any time for any reason. Unless he was involved with some seedy characters or a kidnapping may be suspected, he will be placed in a network with other missing people. His cellphone records will be watched, any credit cards, debit cards will also be monitored, along with any checking or savings accounts and of course, the ATM card.
There’s a lot that police can and most will do within the 48 hours after they are contacted. As for checking his emails and any other social sites, they may need to acquire a warrant.
Ronni—-I wouldn’t go to pieces just yet. It’s still early since he’s been missing. The FBI has reported that 98% of missing people do eventually either show up or contact a relative or friend. He may be just taking a timeout if he has been dealing with some personal issues.
I wish you the best of luck.
Oh Ronni I'm so sorry. Try this "What if" instead of those dark ones. What if your son is sitting on a street corner and a policeman on horseback walks quietly up asks him some questions and then gives you a call to come pick him up? That was the happy ending with my son when he was 35 and had been missing for 6 weeks.I am trying so hard to be optimistic @911. I am by nature a very positive, glass half full person. It’s been extremely difficult for me to not catastrophize this situation and envision worst case scenarios. The mystery, the what ifs, the dark possibilities are crowding my thoughts and it’s sometimes impossible to outrun them.
I think that's a good idea Lara. My son was and still is a bit obsessed with Forest, the young man from "Into the Wild," cloistered monks, etc. Sad confused people often hope that if they get far enough away from the world and its problems they will find peace.You didn't mention whether or not he took his wallet with him. If he did then that might indicate that he plans to feed himself. The police could follow his credit card.
I'm sorry if this sounds far fetched but he may be doing a Forest Gump type run or walk to let go and think about life until he tires himself out. It's a wild guess but suggests hope. I really think he would leave a note if he never planned to return. I said a prayer for him and for your family![]()
@Ronni do have any special friends who you can call anytime who could support you through this? I know you have Ron, but maybe someone else to help you, to come over or go out with or just to talk to?? This could help since our imaginations will run wild during such a situation as you are experiencing.I am trying so hard to be optimistic @911. I am by nature a very positive, glass half full person. It’s been extremely difficult for me to not catastrophize this situation and envision worst case scenarios. The mystery, the what ifs, the dark possibilities are crowding my thoughts and it’s sometimes impossible to outrun them.