Never So Alone As I Am, Now!

@palides2021 - I have prayed to God and asked him to deliver me from enough of the anhedonia to let me feel my Faith the way I used to. There is no change in me. When you pray, you should believe that you will receive that for which you have prayed. In order to feel confident in receiving it, I have to be in touch with my reward centre in the brain, to believe that anything good will happen, from praying. The irony is...that's probably why my prayers are ineffectual...I can't generate any confidence in getting relief enough to feel even my Faith, again. To be able to say that is so bizarre...believe me. :(
 
Ian McKlatchie said:
@palides2021 - I have prayed to God and asked him to deliver me from enough of the anhedonia to let me feel my Faith the way I used to. There is no change in me. When you pray, you should believe that you will receive that for which you have prayed. In order to feel confident in receiving it, I have to be in touch with my reward centre in the brain, to believe that anything good will happen, from praying. The irony is...that's probably why my prayers are ineffectual...I can't generate any confidence in getting relief enough to feel even my Faith, again. To be able to say that is so bizarre...believe me. :(
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Still keep praying, and wait for an answer. One day you will hear His voice. Trust in God.
 
Meanderer said:
Simply put, are you able to talk generally about your mother, since this is mother's day? If not, that is ok.
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Yes. I can talk about my mother. She died 21 years ago. We'd lived together all my life. That's when the worst of the loneliness began to grow from, I think. I spent the next 20 years in entirely my own company. In fact, to give an idea how alone that was...until I got to the hospital, last year, I didn't even realise that I was going deaf - there had been no humans to listen to, to give me an idea of it.
 
Ian McKlatchie said:
Yes. I can talk about my mother. She died 21 years ago. We'd lived together all my life. That's when the worst of the loneliness began to grow from, I think. I spent the next 20 years in entirely my own company. In fact, to give an idea how alone that was...until I got to the hospital, last year, I didn't even realise that I was going deaf - there had been no humans to listen to, to give me an idea of it.
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Maybe listening to music or audio books would help fill that void? ....then there is talking on the blower? I guess kareoke is out of the question? šŸ§ :)
 
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Ian McKlatchie said:
@palides2021 - I have prayed to God and asked him to deliver me from enough of the anhedonia to let me feel my Faith the way I used to. There is no change in me. When you pray, you should believe that you will receive that for which you have prayed. In order to feel confident in receiving it, I have to be in touch with my reward centre in the brain, to believe that anything good will happen, from praying. The irony is...that's probably why my prayers are ineffectual...I can't generate any confidence in getting relief enough to feel even my Faith, again. To be able to say that is so bizarre...believe me. :(
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Marc 9:24 Just pray: Lord I believe. Help my unbelief. Peter had small faith when he was sinking, but Jesus grabbed his hand and pulled him up.

Corrie ten Boom was 5 years old. She lived in the Smedestraat (that means Smith street). She said: Lord save all people in the Smedestraat and the police officers. She said: Decades later different people would call her and say: My husband got saved. Oh what a coincidence. He lived in the same street. My husband got saved. He was a police officer in the Smedestraat.
 
Have you tried any mental health forums? Maybe sharing with like minded others could give you some peace as well as helpful tools. When I went thru my divorce I was active on one (can't recall the name) and found it very helpful, to share honestly and animosity was very therapeutic for me.
 
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