Not Thinking Or Just Don't Care?

ClassicRockr

ClassicRockr

Well-known Member
Which do you think people do more of, "not thinking" or "just don't care"?

My belief is, I think a lot of folks definitely know what they are doing, but they just don't care about others.

Take for instance:

You pull up to a stop sign and stop. The car behind you goes around you and through the stop sign. There is no oncoming traffic to the right or left and the person continues on driving, while you are going....."what the heck???" (or worse language)

Where you live, your bedroom faces a street or apartment complex parking lot. At 4AM, people come out of their apartment or house and are talking like it is 2PM in the afternoon. They are so loud, that you wake up.

Someone goes flying down the freeway, weaving in and out of traffic and barely misses your car.

Sometimes people may not be "thinking", but I think nine times out of ten, people simply don't care.

Your feelings?
 

I was thinking about this very thing over the last couple of days and I don't have an answer.

Friday I was out running errands and heard a siren. It was an ambulance coming up from behind. Only two cars in the line of traffic made any effort to pull over to the side of the street.

Today I was waiting at an intersection and a long funeral procession was going through, a vehicle gunned across the intersection between cars in the procession.

Then there are the endless numbers of people who seem to have run out of blinker fluid and don't ever signal a turn or wait until the last second to use the turning signal.

IMO many people have never been taught these simple things that were drummed into me by my parents.
 

I think its some of both also. There are several 4 way stops in my area. So many times people just barge ahead and don't stop. I notice whose turn it is and go when its my turn unless someone wants my turn. I would rather wait instead of getting hit.
 
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The gf and I discuss this, often. Since I believe most people are truly stupid, and I see daily evidence of that, I think that the ignorant actions you see, when you're out and about, are just that: actions done by the ignorant! I don't think most people ever realize when they make terribly dangerous moves in traffic, or say something to you that is hurtful. An IQ of 90-110, by definition the average range IQ, means a person is pretty stupid! While I don't judge a person strictly by IQ, I've had enough experience, in teaching and being taught, to know that one who has trouble grasping academic concepts, usually has trouble leading a life of intelligence and awareness. Don't get angry at the ignorant. You're wasting your time and energy, on such people, and they're too stupid to care!
 
As for my thinking, I truly think that most people, whether young or old, know what they are doing and just don't care what others think or feel.

A person absolutely knows when they are going to slow in traffic...…..horns beeping at them, people flipping them off. It should be pretty evident that they are going to slow.

A person has to know when they are talking loud at 4AM and they haven't been drinking. Nobody is making a peep of a sound, because they are asleep, yet there are those that will talk loud.

A girlfriend or wife knows when their husband or boyfriend is weaving in and out of traffic, going to fast, not using turn signals and so on. So, either the lady is afraid to say something, that the boyfriend or husband will be upset and yell, or they just like the "macho" type of man that doesn't care about traffic laws.

My wife will tell me if I am going to fast and I will slow down. If the person in front of me is going to slow, she will tell me to go around them and I will, as soon as I can. She never has to worry about me running stop lights or stop signs, not using turn signals or not pulling to the side of the road for an emergency vehicle with lights/siren on......I do it. In fact, not only do I pull over to the side for an emergency vehicle, I will do the hand "stop" thing outside the window. I use to drive an emergency vehicle and know how some drivers either ignored my lights and siren, or they have their A/C running or CD player blaring and can't hear a thing until I was right next to them. Just ask the member, 911 about this. He's "been there" just like me, except I was a Medic.
 
Dumbing down worked too well. Everything these days is so “all about me” superficial. Sadly I think a generation could be wasting itself. Baby boomers, as most of us are, are familiar with the difference of making a change or just doing and enjoying sex, drugs and rock and roll. Sadly dumbed down kids can’t see that. Hope that changes.
 
Lin said:
Dumbing down worked too well. Everything these days is so “all about me” superficial. Sadly I think a generation could be wasting itself. Baby boomers, as most of us are, are familiar with the difference of making a change or just doing and enjoying sex, drugs and rock and roll. Sadly dumbed down kids can’t see that. Hope that changes.
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My experience is quite different. My children are Millenials, educated, successful, courteous and compassionate. Passionately involved with the causes they believe in. Their friends are the same. As a therapist I see many young people, under a variety of circumstances . I don’t believe this is a wasted generation. They care, and they want to make a difference. I recall the end of the hippie movement. I don’t believe that was a wasted generation either, out of it came Greenpeace, and many other valuable causes which have helped shape modern society.
 
Shalimar said:
My experience is quite different. My children are Millenials, educated, successful, courteous and compassionate. Passionately involved with the causes they believe in. Their friends are the same. As a therapist I see many young people, under a variety of circumstances . I don’t believe this is a wasted generation. They care, and they want to make a difference. I recall the end of the hippie movement. I don’t believe that was a wasted generation either, out of it came Greenpeace, and many other valuable causes which have helped shape modern society.
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Perhaps all of us should send all of these “I don’t care” young folks we’ve been around to you. You could “show them the light” and straighten them out. I mean, that is what you do as a Therapist, right? Seriously.

Could even send all the Senior ones, who have the same attitude, to you.
 
Shalimar said:
My experience is quite different. My children are Millenials, educated, successful, courteous and compassionate. Passionately involved with the causes they believe in. Their friends are the same. As a therapist I see many young people, under a variety of circumstances . I don’t believe this is a wasted generation. They care, and they want to make a difference. I recall the end of the hippie movement. I don’t believe that was a wasted generation either, out of it came Greenpeace, and many other valuable causes which have helped shape modern society.
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My experience with Millennials mirrors yours, Shalimar. As a whole they are a delightful generation of young people who are deeply interested in healing our planet and our cultures.

In response to the original question, I'd like to believe that most people who step on the toes of others do so accidentally rather than intentionally. Part of that comes from the obliviousness we all sometimes have regarding where someone else's toes are at any given moment.
 
ClassicRockr said:
Perhaps all of us should send all of these “I don’t care” young folks we’ve been around to you. You could “show them the light” and straighten them out. I mean, that is what you do as a Therapist, right? Seriously.

Could even send all the Senior ones, who have the same attitude, to you.
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Thank you for the compliment Rockr, but I don’t straighten people out, that would be imposing my will on vulnerable people, which would be both arrogant and unethical. What I do is offer them a mirror to see and understand themselves. I can certainly discuss which behaviour patterns are toxic to themselves and others, help them learn skills sets which will enable them to live happier and more productive lives. Ultimately though, it is their choice whether or not to adapt.
 
Shalimar, "... can certainly discuss which behaviour patterns are toxic to themselves and others,..." that is just about what I worked at teaching my children. My adult son and adult (2) daughters are very conscious of treating others with respect in all situations--whether they feel like doing so or not. :) However, my youngest adult daughter has a tendency to lose her temper when some ding-a-ling driver cuts her off, or whatever. Yet she still doesn't do anything stupid to retaliate.
 
Elsie said:
Shalimar, "... can certainly discuss which behaviour patterns are toxic to themselves and others,..." that is just about what I worked at teaching my children. My adult son and adult (2) daughters are very conscious of treating others with respect in all situations--whether they feel like doing so or not. :) However, my youngest adult daughter has a tendency to lose her temper when some ding-a-ling driver cuts her off, or whatever. Yet she still doesn't do anything stupid to retaliate.
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Sounds like you did an excellent job.
 
This thread title reminds me of a blog I read, "The Entropy of Wisdom". Here is 3/4 of it but if you want to read the whole thing then here's a link: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/dori-hartley/world-affairs_b_4842576.html

...."As I get older, I begin to know who I am in ways that I never had an inkling of when I was younger. And the number one lesson I’ve learned is that I can only be me. Fortunately, being me, for me, has given me a real heads up on what I know works and what doesn’t work — for me. Perhaps this is why people are always saying that older people are stubborn; I bet it’s not because of what is perceived as a resistance to change as much as it is an honest sense of self that develops in people of age — one that says, "Hey, I know what works for me, and this doesn’t work, so I’m not budging."

"....The truth is, I don’t care about the world. I just want to get to the next day with as little drama as humanly possible. I’m not cold, I’m just not interested and that came about as a result of being too interested and stressed to the point of madness. I just can’t do it anymore. I don’t want to leave the world and I’m not that zen-ready for the ascetic life on a mountain. But I am in full knowledge of what I want: a peaceful life. And the only way I can have peace is by shutting out the noise of the world.

I’ve always thought that we, as a race, think too much. We’re too involved in minding each other’s business. One thought too many and all of sudden we’re disagreeing with someone. Shove some more thinking on top of that and before long, you’ve got yourself a full blown war, chocked to the max with people thinking about who owns what land, who deserves what rights, who should do this and who shouldn’t do that. All this over processing is madness, and I don’t want to be sucked into that black hole of voices, opinions, demands and ultimatums. I just want peace, the peace that occurs naturally when I stop listening to everyone thinking aloud and acting on their thoughts.

A few weeks ago, I found myself not caring and it troubled me. I wondered if, at some point, I just wouldn’t care about anything, if perhaps my actions were streamlining me right to the loincloth and the meditation cave. No, that’s not me either. In the same way that it’s always a good idea to pick and choose our battles, so it's a good idea to choose our mental state and how we arrive at that place. The only way I, personally, can go on as a happy, thriving person — a person who creates and enjoys beauty, a person who delights in life’s simplicities — is by saying no to complexities that are beyond my control. There are always enough problems to deal with personally. I never have to look past my own front door for more.

My life is simple. Make art, be a mother, pay the bills. This trilogy of actions has everything I need. It contains all my personal possibilities, both good and bad. But... someone else’s problems? An entire world’s problems? Sorry, I just don’t have it in me anymore.

Knowing this made life easier for me. Living this is as close to peace as I can imagine. This works for me. This is the gift of age. It takes a very long time to get old, but once you’re there, the answers come fast and furious. I guess that’s the entropy of wisdom. Let’s just hope I don’t lose my interest in writing.

Then again, if I stopped writing, would it matter?"


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ClassicRockr said:
Which do you think people do more of, "not thinking" or "just don't care"?

My belief is, I think a lot of folks definitely know what they are doing, but they just don't care about others.

Take for instance:

Where you live, your bedroom faces a street or apartment complex parking lot. At 4AM, people come out of their apartment or house and are talking like it is 2PM in the afternoon. They are so loud, that you wake up.
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CR, I think this particular example may be just a case of wanting attention. Same with playing loud music with booming speakers from your car.

Aunt Bea said:
I was thinking about this very thing over the last couple of days and I don't have an answer.

IMO many people have never been taught these simple things that were drummed into me by my parents.
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Me too. Me either. When it comes to driving I tend to agree, that some never learned manners of the road, never thought about what they are doing in terms of others. I suspect when they get older with a little more experience, they will either learn the golden rule, or develop extreme road rage tendencies. LOL
 
All I hope for is room to avoid them -- can't change their behavior because I'm not law enforcement -- if they want the whole road, they can have it. ;)
 

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