Oh, God! Why are you reading this?

It happened again. Oh, the agony. Today, there was a cracked egg in the egg carton. Every morning, I'd take two eggs from the carton, after six days, get a new carton. BUT, now there are an ODD number of eggs, so it won't evenly work out. Most people are upset by death and taxes; me-it's an odd number of eggs. People are strange animals. I was all set to endure the trauma of an odd number of eggs, like I have done in the past. But I thought, why not just have an egg for lunch????????
After all the time this has bothered the hell out of me, I just had to have one for lunch. :unsure: :unsure::unsure:
 
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fuzzybuddy said:
It happened again. Oh, the agony. Today, there was a cracked egg in the egg carton. Every morning, I'd take two eggs from the carton, after six days, get a new carton. BUT, now there are an ODD number of eggs, so it won't evenly work out. Most people are upset by death and taxes; me-it's an odd number of eggs. People are strange animals. I was all set to endure the trauma of an odd number of eggs, like I have done in the past. But I thought, why not just have an egg for lunch????????
After all the time this has bothered the hell out of me, I just had to have one for lunch. :unsure: :unsure::unsure:
Click to expand...
Call your psychiatrist! This is very serious. One egg is close to a national crisis!
 
I have about 100 pine trees on my lot. When I look out my window I see millions of yellow flowers(?) on the branches of all those trees. It's like little cannons of pollen about ready to fire. Everything gets coated with this sticky yellow powder. It gets into everything. This morning there was the first few grains of pollen on my deck. Soon, it'll look like a yellow fog in my neighborhood.OIP (1).jpg
 
Lady Emeraude posted a thread about the order you got dressed. At first, I thought that was dumb, I'm not that regimented. Until I noticed I DO always start to dress by putting on a shirt. Now, I've been noticing how regimented I am. Every morning, I have two sausages. And I have to start by eating the one on the right of the plate. Apparently, there's an 11th Commandment- "Thou shall not eat sausage on left, first". Of course, you go to hell if you do.
The right sock has to go on first. I have to brush the top teeth before the bottom ones. I drink diet Pepsi with meds, but I have to have diet Canada Dry with meals. And you just can't mix this up, because the universe would crumble if you did,

I always thought of myself as this free spirit, living life on the fly. Now, I feel more like a computer printer.
 
Oh, darn, it's raining, I won't be able to mow the lawn today. It is getting to the point where I have to mow the lawn. Yesterday, it was bright and sunny, but like the Bible says, " the spirit was willing, but the flesh wasn't". The flesh has dibs on what I do.
Got up early, and in the back yard, these two cats were getting ready to square off on each other, when this fox walked by. This sounds dumb, but it looked just like a fox-the tail and everything. It was such a delicate looking critter. The cats didn't seem too impressed by the fox, and kept their staring competition going. The fox circled the cats and moved on.
I have to say that's one of the nice things about living next to a state/national forest is you have no idea what's going to come walking out of the woods.
 
Well, it still raining, so no lawn mowing today. I think I'm just wiped out from digging a hole for a flagpole last week
Watching a lot of college baseball on TV. I like that. The players are way more agile than the pros, and they have excited emotions, which the pros don't show. When a pro gets on base, it's his livelihood, it's business.
What amazes me is that while college kids, they are still kids. I'm about 60 years older than them. They think they are adults, but they don't know how young they are. When I was that age, I remember some older people tell me how young I was. Well duh, I was ,19/20+. It never dawned on me how young I really was.
 
I've been watching a lot of college baseball. The game announcers have to take a rigorous IQ test, if they fail -miserably, they get hired.
One s said he was letting us know a coach's secret. They would rather have the opposing team score 1 homerun than a 'grand slam''s 4 homeruns. Duh! I would have never figured that one out. And for some unknown reason, they love to talk about the food they just ate. And you got to love all their statistics.
The other thing about college baseball is all the people in the stands, who are eating. We're not talking nibbling, we're talking hardcore shoveling it in.
I have to admit I'm turning into a Vanderbilt U fan.
 
Nope, didn't mow the lawn. I get an "A" in procrastination. Strangely, it's been very chilly outside. They've even had to bring some local events indoors.
Tomorrow is Memeorial Day in the US. For some reason, I've been thinking one of my shipmates. Wayback in the 1960s, I entered the US Navy, and I went to Corpsman (Medic) School. There was a tall, thin guy, who was a Mormon, which fascinated us. We couldn't care less about his religion; he never touched alcohol or coffee. At that time, getting alcohol into our bodies was the reason for living. I still have a mental image of him. When the school was over, we went our separate ways in the Navy. I went to the Bethesda, Md, Naval Hospital. He went with Marines in Vietnam. About two months later, I heard that the first one of our class was killed. It was him.
 
2 things.
TADA!!!!!! I now have a 39 inch waist. I haven't had a waist measurement that started with a "3" in at least 45 years. I've lost about 50 Lbs. in the last 8 years. I'm amazed I lost weight, because I do frequently pig out a lot.
And I bought new sox. I bought 30 new pairs, and threw out the rest. That way having all the same sox, I don't have to match anything, just throw them in the drawer. I do this about every ten years, so I won't be due again till 2035, when I'll be almost 90.
 
FINALLY, I mowed the front lawn, the back can wait for another day. Mowing the lawn wipes me out. I live on 600 feet of rocks that were deposits of melting glaciers, years ago. So, every year I grow rocks. The frost forces the rocks to come to the surface, then each year they get bigger and bigger. I have a gazillion trees and all these rocks that I have to steer around, which takes time. The deaf guy across the street has one of those velvety green carpet lawns. As long as it's green and it's growing is okay for my "lawn".
 
My plant is still alive and growing. It drinks water like a fish. I give it lots of water, and nothing comes out the bottom of the pot. This is the first plant I've ever had that wasn't dead after a week.
I have to get some new pants, today. I'm not exactly skinny, but I ain't that fat anymore. My 'fat' pants are too big. I can't wear a belt, because wearing a belt activates my back pain. Back pain is strange. One of my MDs can't wear certain shirt material, because it sets off his back pain. I'm using suspenders to keep my pants up, and there's nothing more stylish and " IN" than suspenders. Of course "GQ" is my fashion bible.
https://www.gq.com
 
It's animal house, today. In the back yard, Barney, the bear is meandering by. On the side yard, there's a rabbit munching on some green stuff. And then there's a guy deer sleeping on my lawn, about 50 feet from my front door. Every early morning , he's there. My front yard and my neighbor's side yard are one big lawn. And you'd think a deer would hide in the woods to sleep, but this one likes to sleep right there in the open??? I've been living with deer long enough to know the does are in the bushes having kids. Last year , one deer was born about 10 feet into the bushes off my back yard, and another was born about 30 feet off the corner of my lot.
You forget that this is the animals' home, too.
 
Yeah, yesterday was animal day. In the sky were two eagles or two hawks. They were too far away to tell the difference. I think in the 70s, they placed a pair of eagles near Stroudsburg, PA, and they've been having eaglets ever since. So, now eagles aren't that uncommon.
Today is going to be "phone day". I have to call my MD's geek squad, because my username is "Unkown", and I'm locked out of the site, because "somebody" is using my username. :unsure: That means I can't use the site for appts, refills, etc.
The other problem is my trash co . I use the 'auto' pay app. But they keep sending me a bill claiming it's not paid. My trash co, is a subsidiary of a subsidiary, so there' s a lot of "your call is important to us" stuff.
 
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Went pants shopping at J. C. Penny's at the mall. I hadn't been to the mall in over a year. Apparently, a mall is where we keep empty stores. My mall is really having bad times. One "store" is a church, another is rented out for "events". The mall directory has a bunch of stores listed, but few are actual stores. There's a whole section of just gated shut stores. Every mall in the universe has a "Spencer's" store, but not mine.
There were some shoppers, so it wasn't a ghost town, but it wasn't that far from it either. I never was much of a mall shopper; I was always a Kmart kind of guy.
 

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