Questioning yourself?

My husband passed away in 2018 and I still have a closet full of his clothes. I cannot depart with them. I live alone in the same house I raised my son in and yes it is too large for just me, but I am used to it. I don't want to go into an Assisted Living Facility or anything like that. I am just not ready for that.
 
Betty Boop said:
My husband passed away in 2018 and I still have a closet full of his clothes. I cannot depart with them. I live alone in the same house I raised my son in and yes it is too large for just me, but I am used to it. I don't want to go into an Assisted Living Facility or anything like that. I am just not ready for that.
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I know what you mean!šŸ˜‰
 
Jace said:
Age is catching up...
Life should be simpler..easier.
Don't want so much...in my life.
But, it would have "to be...just about he perfect situation"..before doing anything.
Waiting for IT to present itself! šŸ¤”
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I agree, you can't just make a quick decision on something like this.

Today after trimming all the hedges back and front, my Osteoarthritis was very painful, and I could barely grip anything.. and when I was washing up after lunch again, it was painful just to do that.. it seems to have got so much worse this last 6 months.. and I honestly was thinking, I'm not going to be able to cope with the garden for too much longer if this doesn't stop.. and I did think I'll potentially have to downsize to an apartment . I wouldn't want to, but I may not have too much of a choice...
 
Well right now we are in the midst of having some yard work done, and wanting quotes on cementing our driveway. Theres not a lot because it is a small town.
 
hollydolly said:
I agree, you can't just make a quick decision on something like this.

Today after trimming all the hedges back and front, my Osteoarthritis was very painful, and I could barely grip anything.. and when I was washing up after lunch again, it was painful just to do that.. it seems to have got so much worse this last 6 months.. and I honestly was thinking, I'm not going to be able to cope with the garden for too much longer if this doesn't stop.. and I did think I'll potentially have to downsize to an apartment . I wouldn't want to, but I may not have too much of a choice...
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Enduring pain can be quite distressful.
I don't have arthritis..and am in "pretty good shape"..
I just want a simpler life.
A condo..
 
I am debating on replacing two sets of patio doors with newer energy efficient doors. Seems like a no brainer really, I can afford it but am at the point in life I balance cost vs. return value. If I spend $7,000 on new doors how long will it take me in heating and AC savings to recoup that money? (50 years I figure!) Or if I sell can I automatically ask for that much more money? (no)

Paralyzed by indecision.
 
Jace said:
Enduring pain can be quite distressful.
I don't have arthritis..and am in "pretty good shape"..
I just want a simpler life.
A condo..
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yes I never expected this OA either..because apart from a long standing lower back problem, I'm very fit and able, I don't need help to walk ..no cane, no scooter, I can still run, and even climb rocky mountains.. ... at 66 I feel sure that I should be still relatively fit for my age .. .it never occurred to me ever that I might have to downsize due to health issues... so we'll see..
 
C50 said:
I am debating on replacing two sets of patio doors with newer energy efficient doors. Seems like a no brainer really, I can afford it but am at the point in life I balance cost vs. return value. If I spend $7,000 on new doors how long will it take me in heating and AC savings to recoup that money? (50 years I figure!) Or if I sell can I automatically ask for that much more money? (no)

Paralyzed by indecision.
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co-incidentally I have been debating exactly the same thing and have been for the last 2 or 3 years.. and have the same issue as you with regard to how long it would take to recoup the money and is it worth it.. .. not sure it is tbh...
 
Betty Boop said:
My husband passed away in 2018 and I still have a closet full of his clothes. I cannot depart with them. I live alone in the same house I raised my son in and yes it is too large for just me, but I am used to it. I don't want to go into an Assisted Living Facility or anything like that. I am just not ready for that.
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very sorry about your loss. There is no rush. Take your time, let yourself have some peace. When you are ready for any changes, it will feel right.
 
C50 said:
I am debating on replacing two sets of patio doors with newer energy efficient doors. Seems like a no brainer really, I can afford it but am at the point in life I balance cost vs. return value. If I spend $7,000 on new doors how long will it take me in heating and AC savings to recoup that money? (50 years I figure!) Or if I sell can I automatically ask for that much more money? (no)

Paralyzed by indecision.
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I am going to guess that putting some thick curtains over those patio doors will save plenty of energy and won't cost $7000.
 
hollydolly said:
it's not just hedges.. I have large gardens with many mature trees and shrubs..as well as all the lawns plants, and hedges, ..it would cost me a fortune to employ a gardener, because it needs almost daily attention
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Oh! šŸ˜§Well, then just do a little at a time...and before the OA ā€sets in".
 
hollydolly said:
it's not just hedges.. I have large gardens with many mature trees and shrubs..as well as all the lawns plants, and hedges, ..it would cost me a fortune to employ a gardener, because it needs almost daily attention
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Hollydolly, I know exactly what you mean. I nearly worked myself to death trying to maintain my motherā€™s yard and extensive flower beds when she lived alone.

I could find someone to mow the grass but no one willing or knowledgeable enough to maintain shrubs and flower beds. They didnā€™t know a flower from a weed or right time of year to trim back. And if they were knowledgeable, we couldnā€™t afford them. There was work to be done all 4 seasons and it was me doing it.

My motherā€™s yard & flowers were beautiful ( she won Yard of the month in her town several times) but I was so relieved when I moved her in with me to know Iā€™d never have too concern myself with her yard again.

I did transplant a few of her irises, daffodils, and lilies to my house so she still enjoys them.
 
If your existing doors are in decent shape, maybe spend 1-2k for some nice roll up insulated shades. They will save you more on energy than the new doors. Just a thought.

Missed Jon's post, beat me to it.
C50 said:
I am debating on replacing two sets of patio doors with newer energy efficient doors. Seems like a no brainer really, I can afford it but am at the point in life I balance cost vs. return value. If I spend $7,000 on new doors how long will it take me in heating and AC savings to recoup that money? (50 years I figure!) Or if I sell can I automatically ask for that much more money? (no)
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