Reflections of My Life

katlupe ,,, its been so long ago that I last saw the dolls.
The glass container was not like Mason canning jar.

Lol,, am sitting here making the shape with my hands,, trying to figure how to describe the shape.
Long gated pear shape,, the middle flares out so the doll's full dress doesn't hit the sides.

Sure wish I had kept one of them,, were gifts from my great aunt.
Mother wouldn't let me remove them from the glass container.
I have seen a few in what is called a glass dome but they are quite small.
 

Today was a stressful day for me. My son stopped by here Sunday afternoon when Sonny was here. He seemed fine. Later on, he called on my phone and I had to turn my television down to hear what he was saying, but he had hung up. I called him back several times and he did not answer. Nor all day yesterday either. I called him over and over today but no answer. I cannot go to his apartment because I can not go up the stairs. Finally, around 5, my intercom buzzed and it was him. When I tell him how worried I was he tells me not to worry about him that he is okay. He doesn't understand. I wish I could just not worry about him.

Today the maintenance man installed new smoke/carbon monoxide detectors in all the apartments. It replaces the two detectors with one. Rabbit was not crazy about the alarms on it when he tested it but he did not run and hide.

Tomorrow I will be doing my paperwork for my aide over the phone with my rep from RCIL. I tried to do it on my own, but it gave me a headache. So he sent more paperwork and is going to help me through it. So glad about that because I need that aide.

I did two things today that make me think I am losing my mind........first of all, I think I forgot to rinse the conditioner out of my hair. I am not positive I did that, but think maybe..... The other thing is a problem I have every day, taking my vitamins and supplements. Some of the capsules are identical in size and color. I have them in one of those things for each day, but it does not divide them by morning and night. Today......right while I was taking one, I couldn't remember if took two of them instead of just one. I usually take one and put the other one in this little dish for evening. Today I didn't put one in there. Maybe I took two, I guess it doesn't matter, just vitamins. But still.......I cannot afford to waste them.
 

Today was a stressful day for me. My son stopped by here Sunday afternoon when Sonny was here. He seemed fine. Later on, he called on my phone and I had to turn my television down to hear what he was saying, but he had hung up. I called him back several times and he did not answer. Nor all day yesterday either. I called him over and over today but no answer. I cannot go to his apartment because I can not go up the stairs. Finally, around 5, my intercom buzzed and it was him. When I tell him how worried I was he tells me not to worry about him that he is okay. He doesn't understand. I wish I could just not worry about him.

Today the maintenance man installed new smoke/carbon monoxide detectors in all the apartments. It replaces the two detectors with one. Rabbit was not crazy about the alarms on it when he tested it but he did not run and hide.

Tomorrow I will be doing my paperwork for my aide over the phone with my rep from RCIL. I tried to do it on my own, but it gave me a headache. So he sent more paperwork and is going to help me through it. So glad about that because I need that aide.

I did two things today that make me think I am losing my mind........first of all, I think I forgot to rinse the conditioner out of my hair. I am not positive I did that, but think maybe..... The other thing is a problem I have every day, taking my vitamins and supplements. Some of the capsules are identical in size and color. I have them in one of those things for each day, but it does not divide them by morning and night. Today......right while I was taking one, I couldn't remember if took two of them instead of just one. I usually take one and put the other one in this little dish for evening. Today I didn't put one in there. Maybe I took two, I guess it doesn't matter, just vitamins. But still.......I cannot afford to waste them.
kat it happens to all of us. i sometimes can't remember if i used deodorant. you get older...you start to forget a little. doesn't make you crazy. :)

i had a whole bunch barbies when i was younger and my mom took them from me without asking and gave them to my younger aunt. i was so mad. i never did know why. i got a bunch of collectibles later but i couldn't see the sense in leaving them in the boxes. so i got them out. played with a few. lol! my porcelain one is out on display instead of in her box where i can't see and enjoy her.

my mother wants to get rid of her curio cabinets with all her figurines. if i had a way to get them all over here and room for them i'd take them. but i don't. :(
 
kat it happens to all of us. i sometimes can't remember if i used deodorant. you get older...you start to forget a little. doesn't make you crazy. :)

i had a whole bunch barbies when i was younger and my mom took them from me without asking and gave them to my younger aunt. i was so mad. i never did know why. i got a bunch of collectibles later but i couldn't see the sense in leaving them in the boxes. so i got them out. played with a few. lol! my porcelain one is out on display instead of in her box where i can't see and enjoy her.

my mother wants to get rid of her curio cabinets with all her figurines. if i had a way to get them all over here and room for them i'd take them. but i don't. :(
Can you find a couple of guys to do it for you for some cash? Sonny has a beautiful curio cabinet that he does not want (it was his mother's and is full of things) and I would love it but have no room for it here. I try to keep the amount of things I have here down. I hate the cluttered look and it always looks like I need to get rid of more stuff, not add to it.

I sold a lot of my Barbie doll clothes that my mom crocheted. I had a lot. And those things last. I sold them on eBay and they sold good. I needed the money and I have no one to leave my things to when I die. So as hard as it is to part with some things, I push myself to do so.
 
Today I will be on the phone for at least an hour with my rep from RCIL (Resource Center for Independent Living) to do my paperwork (a big packet! They paid $8.55 to send it from Utica to Norwich). I figure by doing it with him I will get it finished in one shot. Done and then mail it. As much as I was against asking for help before I moved here, I have discovered that sometimes I have to. Many people in my building have aides to assist them and that is actually a good thing. That is how to keep things cleaned and to put preventative measures in place in an apartment. One of the big causes of falls for seniors is tripping over something that was dropped and not picked up. And if someone's apartment is dirty and not being cleaned regularly that can draw bugs into their apartment and spread to others. Definitely don't want that to happen!!! I freak out when a fly shows up!
 
I use two pill containers for my day time & evening meds.

The pill bottles are in 2 different zip lock bags which have day time or evening written on them.
When my father moved in with us 7 years ago,,I stopped all his medicine & took him to our family doctor.

Set his new pills up that way.
Later thought,,Wait IF I become senile no one will know which is what or when to take them.

Hope all goes well with getting an aid to help you.
 
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I use two pill containers for my day time & evening meds.

They pill bottles are in 2 different zip lock bags which have day time or evening written on them.
When my father moved in with us 7 years ago,,I stopped all his medicine & took him to our family doctor.

Set his new pills up that way.
Later thought,,Wait IF I become senile no one will know which is what or when to take them.

Hope all goes well with getting an aid to help you.
I think I will buy another container. Thanks for the idea.
 
Can you find a couple of guys to do it for you for some cash? Sonny has a beautiful curio cabinet that he does not want (it was his mother's and is full of things) and I would love it but have no room for it here. I try to keep the amount of things I have here down. I hate the cluttered look and it always looks like I need to get rid of more stuff, not add to it.

I sold a lot of my Barbie doll clothes that my mom crocheted. I had a lot. And those things last. I sold them on eBay and they sold good. I needed the money and I have no one to leave my things to when I die. So as hard as it is to part with some things, I push myself to do so.
i don't have the room for them. i think she's got like 2 different cabinets and they're pretty big. i have no place to set them.
 
I have been watching the series, Desperate Housewives and even got Sonny hooked on it too. Now I am on season 7 and it has 8 seasons. I think it is meant to be a dramatic outlook of these housewives. Though most of them are not just housewives, having jobs. I have been enjoying it, but..............there are things I would have changed about it. The stories go adrift. You are following a story in every episode and then it ends, abruptly with no closure. People disappear never to be mentioned again. At least kill them! Or something. It has gotten when they introduce a new person or family, I know they will be evil and probably murderers too. After a few episodes they will either be murdered, arrested or leave town suddenly.
 
A picture of Rabbit that came up in my memories on fakebook today. He still does this. I call it "being silly".

View attachment 166854
I wonder if he thinks it makes him invisible like Jimmy Stewart's pal Harvey?

image.jpg
 
Sometimes in my life I have had to keep quiet and not try to force my "good advice" on someone. Especially my son. It breaks my heart to see how he has become such a loner. I know I am too but not as much as him. He used to be social and had lots of friends. Now he has none. Ever since he got into talking to ghosts. I belong to a mental health group (on fakebook) for parents of adult children with mental illness issues. Many are dealing with much worse situations than me. I try to look on the bright side. I am thankful, grateful, that my son is not harming anyone or me, or treating me badly. He loves me and he shows it. Yes, he does not know if it is Mother's Day or my birthday, but every time he leaves my apartment he hugs me and tells me he loves me. Every time he calls me before we hang up he says I love you.

If he went to a doctor for this, I am sure the doctor would put him on some kind of meds. And of course, knowing him, he would not take them anyway. My stepdaughter was bipolar and she was on meds. It did not help her. She said they made her sleep all the time. So she would stop taking them and then something would happen with her and she'd have to start them again. Over and over again. She killed herself. So what good is the drugs? Especially if someone does not want them?

What "good advice" have I tried to give my son? To make friends. Then he reminds me that the only people who want to be friends with a guy in his fifties without a family and a job of his own are "druggies" and people who want to move in on him. Yes, that is what has happened to him over and over.

Yesterday, I found this in my research about him:

" Schizotypal Personality Disorder: A pattern of peculiarities best describes those with schizotypal personality disorder. People may have odd or eccentric manners of speaking or dressing. Strange, outlandish or paranoid beliefs and thoughts are common. People with schizotypal personality disorder have difficulties forming relationships and experience extreme anxiety in social situations. They may react inappropriately or not react at all during a conversation or they may talk to themselves. They also display signs of “magical thinking” by saying they can see into the future or read other people’s minds."

He does not say he can read your mind or see into the future but tells you what the ghosts are saying to him. Are they real? I sometimes wish they were but I don't believe so. Not that I don't believe in ghosts, but his ghosts I don't think are real.
 
Today Sonny is picking me up to take me to the store. Aldi's and Walmart. I think he will be here earlier than usual because he has to get back by late afternoon. His daughter is having a Memorial Day cook out at his house. She had one there last year and there was a lot of people there. I know it is good for Sonny to be with his family and friends so I told him to go. I will not go to any type of activity that has people who smoke at it. I cannot breathe and it makes me physically sick. I have been this way for years now but usually put up with the smokers. No more. Last year I was miserable at that party and said to myself never again. And I have stuck to it. I tell him he can go if he wants to but do not expect me to go.
 
Yesterday, Sonny took me shopping and then picked up a chopped salad from Subway. We get one with double meat and split it. It is one my favorite take out meals. We watched Desperate Housewives and ate our salad in front of my television. The cook-out at his house was changed to Monday due to the weather.

I love Rabbit but still miss having a cat. My friend and neighbor across the hall has one and he is such a good boy. Her older cat passed away last year (due to old age mostly) and she said he was her last pet. Well........she lasted a week without one. So her daughter and her went to our local humane society to see a cat that was posted on their FB page to be adopted. She is in her eighties and uses a mobile chair when outside of her apartment so picking out a companion was a serious thing for her.

In the room with the cats to be adopted, the one she went to see sat up on a shelf up high and didn't even pay any attention to her. All of a sudden, she felt someone nudging her shoulder from behind..........well, of course that is the cat she adopted. She loves him and so does everybody else. Her other cat was old so not as social, but this cat, comes to see who is here and gets right up next to me for petting. Yesterday I bought a bag of cat treats for him and put it on her door as a surprise. I know she won't suspect it was me.
 
I finally finished all 8 seasons of Desperate Housewives. They tied up the ending nicely. I know it is an exaggeration of life in the suburbs, but still I couldn't help but wish some things hadn't happened. I always think about a show or a movie or even a book on how I would have written it. That is why a book is usually always better than a movie about the book. Like Gone With The Wind or Godfather. I think another reason I always like the book better is that you know what the person is thinking where in a movie sometimes you can't actually see what they are thinking. Of course, they have to shorten it or blend several characters together to save money or time.

Now I will probably not watch another series for a bit. I get into watching a series of some show or other and then watch it all the time and nothing else. Now I will catch up on all my YouTube channel subscriptions. I watch several that are from older single women and really enjoy those. Other channels I like are about health, cooking, DIY, thrifting and being frugal or saving money. I like Dave Ramsey but I don't follow his advice exactly. I take bits of it and use what I can. I have done his "snowballing" effect to pay off three of my credit debt accounts and will add one more to the pile tomorrow when my check goes into my account.

One channel I really like now, is Palm Springs Cindy. She is about two years older than me and recently left her husband because she wanted to live in one of those retirement villages and he didn't want to. I think that is about all we have in common really except I wanted to leave my husband to live a normal life. I just find her life interesting. She lives in Palm Springs, California and her whole life is centered around spending money.........which I can't do and never really did and even if I had the money would not do that. I wasn't raised that way. I think maybe I like her because it is just a peek inside a world that I have never been to before. And being on YouTube it is real, not a television show.
 
I can't understand myself. Last night, I could not stand at all on one of my legs. I did not wash the dishes because of it and I barely was able to grind the beans for coffee in the morning. This morning, I forgot about it till just now. Did not hurt one bit. Must be God was pushing me to go to bed.

I drove Jazzy out to the dumpster and then realized that I hadn't charged it since the day I went to Tops. So now it is charging. I think I need to plan on getting new batteries for it. A charge should last longer. My friend downstairs drives a scooter and she gets new batteries every year. I have never replaced these since I bought it from another friend. I will check them out on Amazon and see what they run. I will save the money up in advance.
 
Today is the day I hate. The day I have to get money orders (for my son's rent and my own), go to his credit union and then do some shopping. The stores are always crowded on this day, the 3rd, because everyone gets their checks. It is supposed to be in the 80's for a number of days and thunderstorms are in the forecast. At least that is what I hear. I never check the weather. Two things I can't stand....hot weather and thunderstorms. At least when I am home I do not fear the the storms like I used to. Most of the time I can't hear them.

I realize the reason I hate today is because the store is crowded and it gives me the feeling of having to hurry.........except I don't need to hurry. I am going to write on my grocery list "No need to hurry" just to remind myself while I am in the store. I am going to keep the seat on my walker cleared off (I tend to pile groceries on it while I shop till I find Sonny with the grocery cart again) so I can take that break and sit down more often than I usually do. Have to make it easier then maybe I won't dread it so much.
 
Yesterday Sonny took me shopping and he had his 5 year old great grandson with him. I had a great time with them. I did not let myself become rushed or pressured due to the crowded store. One thing in my favor is that I love the self check-outs and not having to stand in line. The other ones have long lines. I also like to pack my own groceries. Nobody else touching them and I can pack them the way I like. I never liked having a clerk touching my groceries when it was obvious they had a cold. I have been using self check-outs as soon as they had one at our Walmart and boy did it save time. Now I am pretty fast with it and I usually do Sonny's groceries for him too. He likes the clerk check-outs but when he is with me he knows I don't.

Today I am going to work on improving my mashed cauliflower recipe. Recently I had bought the frozen one that is made to cook in a microwave or oven. I do not use microwaves so made it in the toaster oven once and the other one in the NuWave oven. Not really worth buying. No taste. I had to doctor it up. So this one I have several recipes and will blend them to see what I come up with.

It poured last night and the water must have gotten into my air conditioner because when I turned it on this morning, it sounded funny and a bit of water leaked out the front. Now it is working but on hi. Low doesn't seem to be as cool as usual. I will keep my eye on it as I do not want anything to go wrong on it at this time.

Hope anyone who reads this today has a super day!
 


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