Reflections of My Life

We have had four empty apartments on this floor for quite some time now. The new guy, across the hall from me moved in a couple of weeks ago. He does not have an air conditioner and yesterday he looked beat after just getting up. He said the maintenance man said he was going to try to get him an air conditioner. But he did not want to be given something or accept something that others did not get too. I explained to him that when a tenant moves out or their family moves their things out, many times they leave stuff behind they do not want. Like air conditioners. So the maintenance man will store them along with things like walkers, canes, etc. in case someone else might need them but cannot afford them or get them on their own. And they can get them from their other buildings as well. So he felt better about that.

Now we have three empty apartments on this floor right now, but I hear they all have been rented and we will be getting new neighbors soon. Keeping my fingers crossed that we get good people and can have a nice neighborhood on our floor. There are two empty ones upstairs and they are being rented also. Usually people move in around the first but nobody else has moved in as of yet.
 
I am remembering the last year or so living at my house. I was stuck there and had no way to go anywhere since I could not drive the truck. Now today.........I walked with my friend, 10 laps today. Then I went downstairs to the lobby to get my package and talked to the sweetest lady ever who lives down there and to my new neighbor who was sitting in the lobby talking to her. After that I went to the store on Jazzy and ran into my friend who lives in the apartment directly under mine and talked to her a bit. On the way back I talked to her some more. Then I came home to get cooled off and did Rabbit's cage. Sat down with my feet up and someone was knocking on my door.........my friend who lives upstairs came down for a short visit. Now I am eating Keto Chow Apple Pie ice cream.......creamy and tasty!

The city is working on the water pipes through out downtown. Today the fire hydrants were open and water flowing out onto the street! I had to be careful with Jazzy because I hate getting my wheels wet. I don't know if this is routine work or part of the revitalization of downtown that is being paid for by a big grant from the state.

There must have been 20 children playing games in the park by the gazebo on my way to the store. There were a couple of adults nearby so must have been some kind of class. Nice to see them playing outside not holding a phone in front of them.
 
I am remembering the last year or so living at my house. I was stuck there and had no way to go anywhere since I could not drive the truck. Now today.........I walked with my friend, 10 laps today. Then I went downstairs to the lobby to get my package and talked to the sweetest lady ever who lives down there and to my new neighbor who was sitting in the lobby talking to her. After that I went to the store on Jazzy and ran into my friend who lives in the apartment directly under mine and talked to her a bit. On the way back I talked to her some more. Then I came home to get cooled off and did Rabbit's cage. Sat down with my feet up and someone was knocking on my door.........my friend who lives upstairs came down for a short visit. Now I am eating Keto Chow Apple Pie ice cream.......creamy and tasty!

The city is working on the water pipes through out downtown. Today the fire hydrants were open and water flowing out onto the street! I had to be careful with Jazzy because I hate getting my wheels wet. I don't know if this is routine work or part of the revitalization of downtown that is being paid for by a big grant from the state.

There must have been 20 children playing games in the park by the gazebo on my way to the store. There were a couple of adults nearby so must have been some kind of class. Nice to see them playing outside not holding a phone in front of them.
Kat where I live, the kids all still play out... they're on their bikes, they're in the playgound at the park.. they're on scooters and roller skates. ..straight after school they're out playing and all day weekends..Those same kids all have phones, but they don't seem too important to them until they get into teen years..
 
Kat where I live, the kids all still play out... they're on their bikes, they're in the playgound at the park.. they're on scooters and roller skates. ..straight after school they're out playing and all day weekends..Those same kids all have phones, but they don't seem too important to them until they get into teen years..
Children here, even at very young ages are on phones everywhere I go. Sitting in restaurants while eating. I see it all the time. Of course, so are their parents. There are some young boys who ride bikes and skateboards in the parking lot near the back of my building. They are not on their phones but doing jumps off a ramp there. Having fun without a phone.
 
Children here, even at very young ages are on phones everywhere I go. Sitting in restaurants while eating. I see it all the time. Of course, so are their parents. There are some young boys who ride bikes and skateboards in the parking lot near the back of my building. They are not on their phones but doing jumps off a ramp there. Having fun without a phone.
Oh yes it annoys the heck outta me all the parents who are continually on their phones and paying no attention to the children when they're out together...
 
We have had four empty apartments on this floor for quite some time now. The new guy, across the hall from me moved in a couple of weeks ago. He does not have an air conditioner and yesterday he looked beat after just getting up. He said the maintenance man said he was going to try to get him an air conditioner. But he did not want to be given something or accept something that others did not get too. I explained to him that when a tenant moves out or their family moves their things out, many times they leave stuff behind they do not want. Like air conditioners. So the maintenance man will store them along with things like walkers, canes, etc. in case someone else might need them but cannot afford them or get them on their own. And they can get them from their other buildings as well. So he felt better about that.

Now we have three empty apartments on this floor right now, but I hear they all have been rented and we will be getting new neighbors soon. Keeping my fingers crossed that we get good people and can have a nice neighborhood on our floor. There are two empty ones upstairs and they are being rented also. Usually people move in around the first but nobody else has moved in as of yet.
@katlupe, that was wonderful that you eased the new guy's mind by telling him about how they store things that were left behind, particularly air conditioners. I also hope you get good neighbors! The weather here is very hot also. I'm avoiding going out as much as possible.
 
This morning my friend and I did our 10 laps around our hall. It was hot but not that hot to me since my apartment is pretty cool now. The heat used to bother me more than it is now. I wonder if it has to do with the way I eat now? Before I moved here I had to eat whatever we could afford things like pasta, sandwiches, baked goods that I made, snack foods, etc. I was miserable in the summer weather. Of course, here I have air conditioning but when I go outside people are complaining and look worn out but I don't.

The food bank truck came today to deliver food to our building. I had them take my name off their list. I don't want to get it anymore. I had them put my new neighbor's name on the list so he got 2 boxes of food. When he finally got up and was on his way out, I told him he had 2 boxes of food downstairs. He didn't want to take it until I explained that everybody who lives in the building gets it. Two boxes for each apartment. I think he could use it but I almost dread knowing he is cooking in there.

Now I am cooking chicken for supper. I am trying to eat earlier because I am Intermitten Fasting again and my eating window is 11:00 - 6:00 (7/17). I was doing it before but stopped to try to increase my food since I was not eating enough. I just need to tweak it a bit more now.
 
Yesterday was a busy day for me. And hot. Very hot because I had to go outside and walked to Teasers for my hair appointment. I was there about two hours. It is a nice small shop and I enjoy my time there listening to all the stylists and nail techs. Because I knew I'd be doing that, I did not walk the hall in the morning.

My friend never showed up and I didn't see her all day. This thing with her hubby is stressing her out because she doesn't know what will happen to her if he dies. So I can understand her feeling that way somewhat.........but I do not have Dementia, so not exactly.

Not only was yesterday a busy day, but started out early in the morning when I first got up to be a day of bad luck. First thing of all, I looked out the window and stepped on the mat that is under Rabbit's cage and stepped in a puddle of rabbit pee.........yuk on my bare feet! It had leaked out a corner of his cage, which is why I have mats under it. I got too close to it.

Then I got my first cup of coffee and started drinking it when I heard what is called "the 5 beeps of death" for a Ninja coffeemaker. Oh no! I watched a million videos on YouTube and did almost everything that was recommended (and worked for their viewers.......but not me!). I gave up. A year and a half for a Ninja (which I thought was a great brand)? So I ordered a new one, did some research on it and chose a Hamilton Beach one. I have to be mindful of the price so didn't go crazy on this. I just need my morning coffee!

This morning I am drinking a cup of instant that I had for emergencies. It is okay, but not like freshly made in the coffeemaker or perked. Maybe later, I will walk over to the coffee shop and splurge.
 
The new coffee maker arrived today. I have been cleaning it so I can break it in tomorrow. It has an extra thing on it so I can make just one cup and it will go right into my mug or travel cup. But tomorrow I will be making a regular pot. Looks as good as the Ninja.

Today I did laundry and some cleaning. I had a bad couple of days because Sonny called me while I was at the hairdressers (on Friday) and I couldn't talk. Never heard from him again. Till late this afternoon. I had all kinds of visions in my mind of what happened to him. Nobody could get their phone stolen twice in the same month could they?? Well, he broke the new phone.........sat on it! I have sat on mine and never broke it.

I think that is the problem when you do something all the time at the same time. Like him calling me every morning and saying the same thing. Now he does not do that and it confuses me. But it may have something to do with his vehicle problems, his health problems, working at all these race tracks with guys who are younger than his son and the smoke in the air affects him (lungs) and it is HOT. Too hot for us here in NY! My ideal temperature is 70 or below.
 
Monday is always my favorite day of the week. Even when I worked at jobs that had just the week-ends off. It is like whatever I had on my list to do last week that I didn't do, now I have another chance to get it done. Not that I do. But I could.

I had a lot of laundry yesterday and hung it in the shower. Today I am folding and putting away two things every time I go into the bathroom. It is a job that seems to tire me out, well not tire exactly, but hurts my knees since I end up standing for a bit. I cannot stand for any length of time because of my knees only. I find doing any chores means standing for less than five minutes, sit down for five and then start over. At least I get it done.

Yesterday I was so upset over not hearing from Sonny. I didn't know if he was dead or alive or had dumped me. At last, I finally prayed earnestly that he would be okay and would call me. Not ten minutes later......my phone was ringing and his name was on the screen! God does answer my prayers but not all of them. I suppose He has reasons.
 
Monday is always my favorite day of the week. Even when I worked at jobs that had just the week-ends off. It is like whatever I had on my list to do last week that I didn't do, now I have another chance to get it done. Not that I do. But I could.

I had a lot of laundry yesterday and hung it in the shower. Today I am folding and putting away two things every time I go into the bathroom. It is a job that seems to tire me out, well not tire exactly, but hurts my knees since I end up standing for a bit. I cannot stand for any length of time because of my knees only. I find doing any chores means standing for less than five minutes, sit down for five and then start over. At least I get it done.

Yesterday I was so upset over not hearing from Sonny. I didn't know if he was dead or alive or had dumped me. At last, I finally prayed earnestly that he would be okay and would call me. Not ten minutes later......my phone was ringing and his name was on the screen! God does answer my prayers but not all of them. I suppose He has reasons.
God's phone number is Jer 33:3: "Call on me, and I will answer you."
 
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Today, I am going to my dental appointment. The cleaning I was scheduled for the last time I went there that they did not do. So this time I hope I get it though I do not know why I need it if they will be taking most the teeth I have left. My teeth are an example of what happens to a person when they live without dental insurance or money for dental care for more than 20 years. They just kept getting worse. In my previous life, I went every six months for a check up. I didn't even need anything more than the cleanings most of the time. This is one of those things I am scared of and dread...........but look forward to it too.

I will have an early breakfast today so I won't be hungry while I am out. Sonny will not have time for food anyway because he has to drive me right home (with a quick stop at the store) so he can turn around and drive to a race. So that is good because eating at restaurants causes me to eat foods that I don't usually eat.

I will not be walking this morning because I am going to be busy. Have to clean the bunny cage so I do not have to do it when I come back.
 
I made it through the day yesterday. Sonny got his car fixed so it was a more comfortable ride. On the way home we stopped at Weiss (grocery store). I like going there because they have more varieties of products that I buy. Then we stopped at the gas station so I could get a cold drink (Sonny already had one). The sign on the front of the building had a picture of ice coffee with little ice cubes in it. Sonny went in to get it for me and I reminded him to get unsweetened with only a creamer in it. He came out with a ice coffee that had ground up ice in it. Looked more like a slushy. Not appetizing at all! I tasted it.........SWEET! Took another small taste to see if it was a sweetner instead of sugar. Nope, that toxic sugar was definitely in it. I would not drink it so Sonny did. The sweet taste does not taste good to me any more.

A year ago, I would have just drank it. I would have said just for today this won't hurt me. It would send me down that sugar highway and I would eat more high carbs. Sugar does that when you eat it, makes you want more. I would have woke up in pain this morning. Instead I woke up feeling good physically and mentally.
 
I may have mentioned it already but here I go repeating it (sorry about that). I am reading the book Atomic Habits by James Clear for the second time. Also watching another YouTube channel that I follow who is doing a study of the book. I watched one last year and I got a lot out of it. That book is what got me walking every morning in the hall. Since it was winter, January 1st, in fact, it made sense. Well now that it is hot out, it still makes sense. Quicker too since I just walk out my apartment door and walk. The book also got me establishing another early morning habit, which is reading scriptures and doing devotions before I have my morning coffee.

I now find it easy to change or start a new habit. It makes sense. So many things I do already that are or have become habits. If I make a new habit easy to do and/or related to another habit that I all ready do then I establish it quickly. It is the key to being organized and keeping my home neat and clean. I also like to keep things I use daily nearby and easy to get to but put away. (I am aware that I used the words "already" and "all ready" in the same paragraph. Even after researching it I am still not sure of which to use when. If you know, please tell me.)

Another tip James Clear gives is to think of yourself as being whatever you want to be or what you are trying to change. Like if you are working on changing your health issues do not tell everyone you are whatever, for instance don't say "I am a diabetic." I should not say, "I have bad knees." Or "I have mobility issues." Nope. Getting that out of my brain and thinking of myself as someone who is healthy and will be walking fine in the near future. Be what you want to be and then work on doing so.
 
This morning I made a list of possible blog posts I can write. As I mentioned before, I have had a time changing the focus of my blog from homesteading. Now (or for the last 5 years) am writing about my life as a single senior age woman living downtown. It was a big adjustment for me after my homesteading life. Life just keeps throwing obstacles in my way. I have to go around them or give up (which I cannot do). So I am going to try to work on my blog two hours a day. If I get more than one post written I can set it to publish on another day. I no longer monetize it because any money I make would affect my rent and other benefits I get. Meaning.........a lot of paperwork constantly. So writing it only because I have to write for my own mental health. I just always have.

One of the guys who lives here has had a mobile scooter that never seemed to work very well. His aide applied to his insurance company (one of the supplements for Medicaid) to pay for parts and repairs. They paid for all the parts and paid another tenant who lives here $150. to fix it. He fixed it in one day! Now it works great and even goes faster. I know when I put brand new batteries in Jazzy last fall it surprised me how fast it would go. I don't drive it fast because I am careful about my new tires and casters hitting a pot hole or little stones. So far, Sonny has fixed it when I needed it fixed. If he was not able to do it anymore, I would have to pay someone to do it. My insurance supplement would not pay for it because they did not buy my chair for me. I bought it myself.

I am missing walking or driving Jazzy in the parks. It is just that smoke from the wild fires keeping me inside. I am feeling I have to chance it because I am an outdoor girl. I would spend hours in the forest with my cats just walking and taking pictures and talking to them and the trees. I never thought I would not live in the forest ever again, but that is my reality.

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Patches leading the way on one of my walks in the forest.
 
One thing I have learned about life is that even if you do everything possible you can never eliminate all the stress from your life. It seems like you go from one stressful situation to another and that makes up the timeline of your life. Some of those situations are worse than others but they are there nonetheless. My mother's advice always helps me more than anything else I have seen. She said to make a list of all the bad things about the situation. Then make a list about all the things you can do to change it or to live with it.

Needless to say I have a notebook full of lists! I try to stay positive even when I don't feel it. James Clear in is his book, Atomic Habits says to fake it and pretty soon it will be true. He is speaking of whatever it is that you want to be or do. If you want to be a cook then say, "I am a cook." Even when you can't boil water. If you want to be a writer or a healer, then do the same. Pretty soon it will be true. Learn everything you can find about whatever it is that you want to do. YouTube is a good place to start. Many books, I find are outdated by the time they are published.

Living in a city, without any land at all, I have found it difficult to find my space in this life now. I was a girl of the forest and now I only see it faraway in the distance. I miss foraging for wild medicinal and edible plants as well as growing my own garden. I think that has been one of the hardest things to adjust to and it has been five years now. I have to buy them now and that is not the same as growing them yourself. Or discovering them in the forest.

The thing about the forest is that one day you discover some plants coming up that had never been there before. In fact, they had been there for a very long time just had never appeared above ground. Something as simple as that would excite me. I could not share it with anyone else because nobody else (not even my husband) understood my interest. It seems most people want to clear the forest or their land so they can set up a big house. I would be happy with a tiny one floor cabin as long as I could have electric (I learned my lesson about the alternative energy!). Unfortunately, that is never going to be my reality. So I am learning to make do with what I have while still staying positive.
 
Maybe you could find some non-permanent mural type wallpaper of a forest and paper one wall and make it your getaway place? (Amazon)

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