Reflections of My Life

100 mega bytes per second internet speed here is $51 a month. I got 300 mbps for gaming and streaming. $71 a month for that. I had originally got a plan that was unlimited and they removed that without telling me. and I hafta pay for that separate. so my internet bill is $101 every month.

as for transparency on living places...i moved into an apt building that came with bed bugs when i first moved to town. they never said a word. one of my neighbors told me.
 

My son's birthday is on Saturday and I ordered a microwave for him as a gift. He will be surprised because I don't usually buy him presents. I just thought it might save him some money on the electric bill. Right now everything he cooks or warms up or even for hot water he has to use the electric range. It is supposed to be delivered on the 13th and I hope it will be. But if not, it is okay.

I made a dent in the paper pile today. Not all of it. Not even half of it. I will work on it again tomorrow.

Had keto breaded pork chops for supper. They are delicious. Breaded with crushed pork rinds and seasonings.
 
It has warmed up some. 25 degrees presently. Light flurries right now. I plan on working on these paper piles. When I go through them it seems like a lot of it is going in the garbage. I tend to pile them up instead of dealing with them when I get them. Part of the problem is my files are not current anymore and I need to fix that. I have a box of brand new file folders just waiting for me to get working on them. So will be doing that.

Putting together my March budget sheet too. I spent some money on my credit card this month and I was in the process of getting them paid off. So going to see what I can do to continue that goal. The bed and now the microwave for Jeff set me back a bit but I can handle it. As long as I don't use them again. I shouldn't need anything else.

In May, I will have lived here on my own for eight years. This is the longest I have ever lived alone and took care of myself. It is also my happiest time. Even when I was with a husband (and I had three, so I know) I always retreated somewhere in my house where I could be alone. By myself. Once I close the door when I come home I feel at peace.

So that is why I do not interact so much with people in the building. I talk to them all and treat everyone good. I feel like I don't know what they are going through on a personal level so being nice and liking everyone does not hurt me. The only bad things about living here is the management or owners. All outside my door. I think the people would not be so negative and get along better if the management was organized and responsible.
 
Happy Heart said:
This one brought tears to my eyes. My bunny is getting on now and I don't think she sees very well so I try not to think too much.
Click to expand...
I know the feeling. After Rabbit went blind I set up special paths for him since he was a free roam house rabbit. If I changed something I showed it to him and made sure he knew his path. He did okay with that. Just did not do binkies anymore or run around like he used to. Made me sad but I worked with him and did the best I could. I miss him terribly.

Just take it one day at time and be thankful for that day. That is what I did. 🤗
 
Valentine's Day will always be a special day for me. It is my son's birthday. I can barely believe he will be 56 years old! But it is true. Valentine's Day was a special day for my family when I was growing up. I guess it was only fitting that I had Jeff on that day too.

My mother told me that when my father was stationed in New Orleans when he was in the Army on Valentine's Day he sent her a big heart shaped box of chocolates. The post man delivered it to her house and of course, her sisters were all jealous. She loved getting it special like that. After they were married every year he gave her a box of candy like that. Then when us kids came along he gave us those small heart shaped boxes too. When we were a little older, teenagers, he gave us boxes of chocolate covered cherries.

In my first two marriages I got cards, flowers and candy. My first husband also gave me jewelry. In my last marriage I didn't get anything. I think I never even got a card or gift for any occasion. Not even my birthday.

The first year I was here Sonny gave me a card, candy and a stuffed rabbit but not after that. It is okay with me because I don't need anything. He does a lot for me and I appreciate that. A gift is not important to me at this point in my life.
 
Well, I have had some day! The microwave I ordered for Jeff's birthday was delivered. It was HUGE! I could barely fit it on my walker and get into my apartment. I took it out of the box........whew! A lot of work. Then I looked at the booklet that comes with it. OMG he would never be able to understand this thing with all the buttons. So I called him and asked him if he wanted a microwave. He instantly said NO! I told him I got him one for his birthday and it was here. Did he want it? Nope.

Now this is strange but right after I ordered it I kept having a voice inside of me that said I should not have bought it. It was too much money and I put in on a credit card. Which I promised myself I was not going to use except for the bed. So I packed it back into the box and started a return on Walmart's site. I just have to take it to the local store's customer service desk and show them the refund thing on my phone. Next time I get Sonny here we will take it back.

I felt relieved. I keep asking myself why did I even buy it? I knew he could not figure out how to use it properly. He would break it for sure. He is not careful. I have to remember this incident and keep it in mind next time I do something like this.
 
katlupe said:
I know the feeling. After Rabbit went blind I set up special paths for him since he was a free roam house rabbit. If I changed something I showed it to him and made sure he knew his path. He did okay with that. Just did not do binkies anymore or run around like he used to. Made me sad but I worked with him and did the best I could. I miss him terribly.

Just take it one day at time and be thankful for that day. That is what I did. 🤗
Click to expand...

It is sad that Rabbit and other pets have shorter life spans than we do. I know how much you miss him. But we wouldn't want them to outlive us and have to navigate the world by themselves.
 
Babs2u said:
I sometimes have bouts of depression. I only learned recently that despair is a sin. I had better shape up.
Click to expand...
It is not easy to overcome it. I never suffered from depression but my husband did and he still does. I started to be affected by his negativity and that is why I found a way to leave. Got my own place and it made a world of difference for me. Sadly, not for him.
 
Babs2u said:
It is sad that Rabbit and other pets have shorter life spans than we do. I know how much you miss him. But we wouldn't want them to outlive us and have to navigate the world by themselves.
Click to expand...
Exactly! I prayed that I would outlive him. I told him all the things I was going to do after he was gone and now I am doing them. I remind myself of this quite often.
 
I am still trying to get used to sleeping in a real bed. It is weird to say that I sometimes cannot sleep there the whole night. It is my shoulders and neck that start hurting and I have to get up. But they hurt in the recliner too. Just spending more and more time in it and I think I will be used to it.

Today I got the lamp I ordered for the far corner above the head of the bed. It has a remote control and I already love it. Lots of different settings too to change the warmth of the light or dim or brighten it. Very nice. I will get a photo of it tomorrow.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top