Scheduling Christmas with family and blended family

Ronni

Ronni

Well-known Member
Location
Nashville TN
Ron and I are struggling a bit to figure out how to do Christmas. We have my kids and grandkids, and his kids and grandkids, and we had a blast on Thanksgiving with the blended family getting together. The grands all played SO well together, and all the kids get along great.

Christmas however is a different deal. We have Ron's ex and her husband's kids to contend with, my family, his daughters and their various children, and it's quite a production trying to figure out how to schedule everything. I don't care when we get together, just THAT we do.

How do you, who have blended families, deal with the scheduling?
 

DH’s kids live a few hours away. We usually see them every third year. His ex gets one year, we have one year & they can go to the spouses parents other years. There’s absolutely no way we will spend the day with his ex at the event. I much prefer to visit in any other season than Christmas. I have only celebrated with my kids who live back east once in over 20 years. We go in other seasons that are less stressful for travel.

This year we will be alone. Absolutely will not visit during Covid.

Basically, we play it by ear.
 
Aunt Bea said:
In my family, we always opened the door to all of them and expected them to get along while they were under our roof.
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Well yeah. I get that. That’s my expectation too when everyone is together. And when they do get together there are zero issues. Everyone gets along well. It’s not that.

It’s trying to navigate the scheduling that is so frustrating. Ron’s ex Julie got so nasty that we had to block her all because she’s decided she wants nothing to do with us since we didn’t invite her to our wedding 🤦🏼‍♀️

I can’t know for sure, but she SEEMS to be waiting till the very last minute to announce her plans for gatherings (thanksgiving is a prime example) so that our planning for same becomes even more difficult. Ron’s kids are pretty frustrated about that too.

Im trying to be accommodating of her schedule, but it’s pretty hard to plan when there’s no solid information till right before, so his girls (and us too) don’t know what they’re doing/where they’re going when till the 11th hour. 😖
 
Ronni said:
Well yeah. I get that. That’s my expectation too when everyone is together. And when they do get together there are zero issues. Everyone gets along well. It’s not that.

It’s trying to navigate the scheduling that is so frustrating. Ron’s ex Julie got so nasty that we had to block her all because she’s decided she wants nothing to do with us since we didn’t invite her to our wedding 🤦🏼‍♀️

I can’t know for sure, but she SEEMS to be waiting till the very last minute to announce her plans for gatherings (thanksgiving is a prime example) so that our planning for same becomes even more difficult. Ron’s kids are pretty frustrated about that too.

Im trying to be accommodating of her schedule, but it’s pretty hard to plan when there’s no solid information till right before, so his girls (and us too) don’t know what they’re doing/where they’re going when till the 11th hour. 😖
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I would announce an open house/drop-in policy and leave it up to everyone involved to come and go as they pleased during set hours. It makes it easier for the people that are expected to be in more than one place on Christmas day or those that just want to spend a little more time at home.

The other thing that I would offer is for you and Ron to head out on the road and do the visiting so the families with smaller children can start their own traditions and enjoy Christmas at home. We eventually did that in our family because it was easier on the smaller kids not to be taken away from their presents so soon after they had received them.

Good luck with whatever you decide.
 
Here you can't gather in groups of more than 6...and those 6 have to be living in the same home, or be in the same family bubble..

Yesterday our lockdown was lifted so all the pubs and restaurants are open again..well of course no-one's been able to go during November so in the 3 weeks that's left 'till Christmas, everyone is trying to get into the pubs and restaurants .. so I booked online last night at one of our fave pubs for this Sunday lunch ( we usually just turn up but I wanted to ensure we'd get a table outside)... and this morning we had a call from the pub checking and looking for assurance that we were all from the same family bubble..or household..

As C'est Moi, so succinctly nearly put it... or in Brits speak... Beggar that for a game of soldiers.. avoiding people as much as possible for the best part of a year just to invite people into your home who all want to bring a plus one called Covid... :eek:...not on your Nelly Mate
 
Yeah my oldest son and his family live in California so they’re staying put. Plus Corey is a first responder ( Captain of his station and a paramedic) so on the front lines of this Pandemic, and he’s acutely aware of bringing the virus to us.

But Ron’s 2 kids and 2 of my 5 kids are in our bubble so they’re who we’ll gather with.

We would normally go to several friends’ Christmas get togethers, two different Christmas dances and a gathering at one of my sons’ houses as routine events, and other events would pop up randomly.
 
Doing solo for CHRISTMAS.
Reason ....no family....
Other than my foster daughter.....
She still continues to be all over......so don't feel safe.....
Will take over gifts, and will watch the grandkids open presents on video, that will be fun to watch.
 
We don’t have a “blended” family, but have a hard enough time just trying to get all of the kids and grands together. I can’t even rember the last time all 15 of us were together. The culprit is one D-I-L who doesn’t really like any of us, but me in particular. (and I swear to God, NOTHING ever happened to make her feel this way!). It bothered me for the longest time until I realized she doesn’t like her own mother either 😢. Our son and the boys travel up here all time but she has always had excuses not to be with them. We travel there two or three times a year and everything is fine-ish except I’m on pins and needles afraid I will say something to offend her. I’ve always suspected that she may be bi-polar, but that is a story for another day😊. Anyway, I’m envious that your family all gets together no matter the hassle of making it happen💕
 
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