Senior Winter Holiday Depression

debodun

debodun

SF VIP
Location
way upstate in New York, USA
Christmas comes at a time in the year when the days are at their shortest (in the northern part of the Northern Hemisphere). Some people experience seasonal affective disorder. Older folks that have outlived most of their family and friends or live a distance from them, have no company.

I don't know why I feel so antsy and disconsolate this year more than previously.
 

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I have largely been alone all my life. I found that my work which often meant working throughout the holidays meant I was busy. So, when I was working I never missed others or felt alone during the holidays. I think having a job would go a long way to lessening being alone for many people. I have more and more come to that conclusion for myself. I am looking forward to getting a job next year and stay working the rest of my life.
 
dilettante said:
It doesn't hurt to get a medical opinion. Most of the home remedies are valid, but may only help as supplemental to correcting an underlying issue like anemia or depression.
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Perhaps. But I did ask a doctor friend why doctors weren't suggesting things like vitamins for certain issues. His answer was "because they're not taught that". They're generally not taught about food, vitamins, minerals, etc.

So you might end up on some drug you don't need, that has side-effects you don't want. Or in therapy for "winter holiday depression" when it's due to lack of daylight and vitamin D (which can be gotten from daylight or taking vitamin D).

Nothing wrong with getting checked out for anemia, but personally I'd be careful of getting on some drug regimen that comes with its own problems.

I could go on, but enough said.
 
Same here... the last 2 years have been the worst of my life..I've never known a life without people in and out of my home..

Stuck here in this house with no-one, is beginning to get a little bit depressing not to mention incredibly lonely... and I have to check that somehow, before it gets out of hand.

Deb.. will you be meeting up with family over the festive season ?
 
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Devi said:
Perhaps. But I did ask a doctor friend why doctors weren't suggesting things like vitamins for certain issues. His answer was "because they're not taught that". They're generally not taught about food, vitamins, minerals, etc.

So you might end up on some drug you don't need, that has side-effects you don't want. Or in therapy for "winter holiday depression" when it's due to lack of daylight and vitamin D (which can be gotten from daylight or taking vitamin D).

Nothing wrong with getting checked out for anemia, but personally I'd be careful of getting on some drug regimen that comes with its own problems.

I could go on, but enough said.
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Great advice!
 
I too suffer from SAD, and it has seemed worse since COVID.I also never retired, because I worked as a volunteer on a large web site for 25 years. I would often put in about 30 hours a week or more. We were all unpaid volunteers and most of the time I was the only civilian at the site.

But the site owner made some critical errors involving the site 2 years ago, and a moderator I am friends with, believes the site will completely shut down soon. Their site traffic has become minimal and it used to be constant.

I think I am more depressed over that, than having SAD-as well as depressed over the problems America has, many which could easily be resolved, in my opinion.

I got up every day for 25 years, with the goal of helping disabled vets and their survivors ,at the site, get through the claims process at the VA. I had developed expertise in numerous fields of VA case law , Agent Orange, and PTSD claims, etc etc and now that goal is gone. I and my husband were VA claimants as well- and those personal experiences allowed me first hand knowledge of the way any VA claim can succeed, if the evidence is probative.

I also believed this was God's plan for me. But I think there is still a potential for doing that type of work-there are other large vet sites on the web. And maybe someone will purchase the site I was at and we could gain back all the members we lost.

I saw a medical article somewhere that D-3 helps with SAD and I take D-3 every day.

We expect sunshine for the new few days! I do feel better today knowing the sun will be out.
 
hollydolly said:
Deb.. will you be meeting up with family over the festive season ?
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We had the "family party" this past Sunday, but it seemed to me they just wanted to get it over with. We usually had a big buffet style meal with everyone bringing a dish or two to share and spent the afternoon playing games, but there wasn't much interest this year. A lot less there than usual - one cousin is in very bad health, so understandably, she and her family didn't attend. One cousin's wife wasn't there, and another cousin was expecting his son and family to come, but they never showed up.

I tried to maintain a jovial attitude while there, but I didn't see anyone laugh or even smile. We hadn't had the party in 4 years and many had developed health problems in the meantime. There just seemed to be a pall over everyone and some likely rubbed off on me.
 
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debodun said:
We had the "family party" this past Sunday, but it seemed to me they just wanted to get it over with. We usually had a big buffet style meal with everyone bringing a dish or two to share and spent the afternoon playing games, but there wasn't much interest this year. A lot less there than usual - one cousin is in very bad health, so understandably, she and her family didn't attend and another cousin was expecting his son and family to come, but they never showed up.

I tried to maintain a jovial attitude while there, but I didn't see anyone laugh or even smile. We hadn't had the party in 4 years and many had developed health problems in the meantime. There just seemed to be a pall over everyone and some likely rubbed off on me.
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awww. nooo. that's great shame , especially if you'd been looking forward to it,... what a downer or would that be a Debbie downer?>.:sneaky:..... well if it's any small consolation we appreciate you and your humour..🤗
 
As a child, Christmas was a miserable day and my mother made sure it was as much so as she could. She stopped allowing my stepfather to attend his family's events. Holidays were big for them. What terrible memories.

So now, I enjoy the holiday season as much as I can. I don't work Christmas day which is fine, I've worked enough of them. I'll stay home with the cats and that will be that.
 
debodun said:
We had the "family party" this past Sunday, but it seemed to me they just wanted to get it over with. We usually had a big buffet style meal with everyone bringing a dish or two to share and spent the afternoon playing games, but there wasn't much interest this year. A lot less there than usual - one cousin is in very bad health, so understandably, she and her family didn't attend and another cousin was expecting his son and family to come, but they never showed up.

I tried to maintain a jovial attitude while there, but I didn't see anyone laugh or even smile. We hadn't had the party in 4 years and many had developed health problems in the meantime. There just seemed to be a pall over everyone and some likely rubbed off on me.
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Deb, I am truly sorry. Breaks my heart to read a cousin was expecting his son and family and they didn't show. It's got to be so hard when things change for people who have happy and fond holiday memories.
 
Where I live we get 300 days of sunshine a year. It wasn’t like that when I lived in Wisconsin or upstate New York. Too much gloom is hard to deal with.

Although I have quite a few friends the best thing I did was to sell the house immediately and buy my condo. I have 4 friends in the building and we often get together on the spur of the moment besides planned gatherings. I had people tell me not to make any big decisions for a year. Had I listened to that advice both prices and interest rates would have been much higher. Living here has been good for my soul.

Going back to work consulting a year ago also helped. I have found volunteering hasn’t been as rewarding as I had hoped. I think the most challenging part of aging is all the loses we experience not only in people dying but loss of physical abilities, etc.
 
I have 5 cousins on that side of the family and they are all in their 60's or very near. Three aunts by marriage and they are in their mid to late 80s. There are 4 second cousins, but two don't live withing traveling distance, one is helping take care of his sick mom and the one that didn't show up with no explanation.
 
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