Seniors Here Who Live Alone, Would You Have Someone Share Your Home With You If You Could?

[NorthernLight]

That is what I wish I could do also; it's just so awful that places like that around here are so darn expensive and heck, even if you hit the lottery or something, there are still 3- or 4-year waiting lists to get moved in to so many of those places. I wish there were a nationwide movement to build more of these places but as a realtor told me, the reason why there are very few--if any in some cases--of them being built is because amongst the realty and construction communities, senior housing is considered undesirable since it's so hard to re-sell single family homes or condos nearby; the realtor said it happened to her all the time that if she was taking clients to go look at a house and the client saw one head of grey or white hair, turned to her with a frown and said "Are there a lot of old people living around here?" and if she answered anything other than "no", would say they didn't even want to see the house since they didn't want to live around a bunch of old people who'd be "complaining about loud music" or the client didn't want to hear ambulance sirens all the time because of some old person's chest pains.

I didn't know that! Wow.

Years ago, one of my brothers and I were considering living together. I found a really nice house for rent in a seaside village. My brother didn't want to live there because of all the "old people." He's a carpenter, and he said whenever an old man saw him working, they'd want to tell him that they'd done a little carpentry themselves, and ramble on about their renovations or the shed they'd built.

Anyway ... To me, living alone is pointless. I'd like to live with someone if I could afford it. My biggest worry would be that if they moved out or died, I'd be stuck with a place that was too expensive for one person. (This has happened to me before.)

 

[Sippican]

Living "alone" doesn't really mean you are all alone in the world. I'm in a very nice condo in a hi-rise, plenty big enough for one person but not big enough to be a problem to take care of. My apartment is filled with mementos of my long, happy married life, and lots of stuff given to me as gifts or inherited from my parents or in-laws. There wouldn't be room for another person and all their "stuff!"

But more important, I enjoy my privacy. I decide what and when to eat, what to watch on TV, when to (or if) to sleep, etc. At this point another person would be an interference. But there are plenty of other people in my life, they just don't live here.

The best solution, for me anyway, is to live alone in an independent, senior community with an active social life. All you have to do is walk out of the apartment, and there are plenty of friends, activities, interest groups, social fun, etc.

Absolutely! Being alone doesn't always mean you are lonely. I am very comfortable puttering around the house for days on end. But, I do go out and socialize once in a while. We enjoy our times together, we travel all over on cruises, plane trips, different countries, 30 day motorcycle rides, but at the end of each trip, we are glad to get back to our own caves!

 

[Sippican]

Sounds like you guys a have a good arrangement.

I have been dating a woman for 4 months now. We like being together, obviously. She sleeps over at my place often.

But she wants to get married, and I don't. She also wants to move in with me, and I don't want that. So I have what I want in the relationship, but she doesn't. We have talked about it. She is still hoping to change my mind. I am hoping she will be satisfied with things the way they are.

I guess the question is ....why? I find when you live together, communications dwindles because you can't say, "whats new?" Because you are doing everything together, every day. You need separate lives to make your times together more enjoyable, learning what the other has been doing while apart.

 

[VaughanJB]

The right person - yes.

The wrong person - no.

 

[SeniorBen]

I might consider sharing my house with someone around my age who liked to play music, as long as it was the same kind of music I play... Grateful Dead, folk, bluegrass, blues, rock... that kind of stuff. He or she couldn't be into heavy partying, though, and had to be somewhat tidy.

Other than that, I wouldn't even consider having a roommate. Been there, done that.