Slowing down, what is it?

NorthernLight

NorthernLight

Well-known Member
Location
Northern BC
Hi. I'm 70 (female). I'm healthy and I exercise daily. But things are changing, and I wonder where they're heading.

I moved to a small, isolated town last year, for financial reasons. I've lived many places and experienced various negative emotions, but this was the first time in my life that I knew what loneliness was. I worked hard to find or create things to do with people, but sometimes it seems they're more trouble than they're worth. I've quit a couple of things already.

Even easy or enjoyable activities take a lot out of me. These include going to the grocery store (one block away) or library, or joining a friend for coffee. I've gotten to the point where I have to limit outings to 3 days a week, because I need a day to recover. (I don't lie in bed; I do a lot online, including game show host.)

Simple tasks now seem complicated. For example, brushing my teeth involves a whole series of actions, and I have to pay close attention. Same with housework and so on.

Last month I was offended because someone asked me to do a favor that I didn't want to do. I dealt with it okay, but then I felt so upset that I didn't function well for 2 weeks. This is unlike me.

Sometimes people are disappointed or don’t understand why I can't participate or whatever. I try to explain that I'm getting older, and they scoff at that. One person said, "You're not old. Old is like 70 or 80." Well, I am 70!

Last year (before moving here), I drove across the continent and back. Sometimes I drove all night or slept in my small car. I had a ball. I didn't feel old then. Unfortunately, I can't afford to drive around for the rest of my life.

I guess this is what they call slowing down. But I don't understand it. Any insights or tips will be appreciated.
 

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Hi.. nice to have you join us...

I know how you;re feeling , because this last year, and since we lost 2 years of our lives doing nothing due to being Covid Locked down.. I feel I lost a lot of my get up and go.. it all kinda went.. and I really believe it was the inactivity of the covid years..

Don't get me wrong..like you I try to keep active.. but also like you, I find that if I have a day out or a full day of activity, I HAVE to have a day's rest at least before the next..

I'm also someone who would think nothing of driving hundreds of miles and that includes on the continent every year ..but now... I just don't feel up to driving here where I live more than a 100 miles .. and even then I put it off where I can.. The traffic is just horrific now, and it takes all the joy out of driving..

ETA..I'm 67 BTW.. that's me in my Avi..
 
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Welcome @NorthernLight ! Good to have you here.

I will be 70 next month and I know just how you feel. I am fighting it, but I need more rest, breaks, and naps than ever, guess it just comes with the territory.
NorthernLight said:
One person said, "You're not old. Old is like 70 or 80." Well, I am 70!
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LOL, I was with a younger friend a couple of months ago, she was talking about an "old man" who was having a lot of trouble getting around. I asked he how old he was and when she said 70 I said so am I. She did a lot of back tracking, but the damage was done. I didn't mind, I remember thinking people a lot younger than 70 were old, those days are long gone.
 

I have these days as well not thinking it is a physical thing but a mental one..
yesterday i walked 10 miles did workouts and yard work.....
Today not so much .... not that i am physically tired ............just do not have the drive to do some challenges i usually participate in etc.
I had some issues pop up that cannot be handled until tomorrow sometime ............and the what ifs and worry made me just want to lounge all day ....
i have a walking streak of 5 miles a day so forced myself to get at least that done or let 230 day streak down the drain but some days are like that. i feel the same malaise when i am doing favors or chores that i simply do not feel like doing......
 
As we age it is normal to slow down. You have moved into a smaller community, if will be harder to find friends with the same interests and enegry levels. It all takes time, learn as much as you can about your new community. There could be an opportunity to start new circle of friends that share the same interests.

Check very website in your new town. See what is out there and what applies to you. If there is something else that interest you, put a notice up at the community center or library. If you are a book lover, start a book club, if you knit, sew or crochet, start a club or offer lessons ( samll fee) if you are a cook, foodie, look into startin a group that could form a once a week potluck dinner. Those are just a few ideas to connect, I am sure there that would be of interest.
 
NorthernLight said:
Last year (before moving here), I drove across the continent and back. Sometimes I drove all night or slept in my small car. I had a ball. I didn't feel old then. Unfortunately, I can't afford to drive around for the rest of my life.
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Are you sure you want to stay where you are? Do you feel you made a mistake moving there? Could your energy level be being impacted by grief from losing adventure?

Maybe you would enjoy using a life-coach type service, when I was deciding to sell everything and become a nomadic traveler for awhile, it was super helpful to have a phone conversation every week with a coach who had me make pro/con lists and prioritize decisions and actions.

Of course it is a good idea to make sure you don't have a health condition that you are unaware of, like maybe your thyroid level is low.

Or maybe you are not sleeping as well or not getting enough oxygen (whatever that health issue is where people stop breathing while they are asleep, I forget what it is called but I would guess it could happen without a person being aware of it)?

I've read that the first years of retirement are the 'go-go' years and the next phase starts in our 70s with the 'slow-go' years, I'm only 66 and I'm kind of desperately trying to doing all the go-go I can right now because I can really feel that I'm slowing down and less able to do things I used to do. I can completely understand your only wanting to do three things a week, that is all I can handle other than just going for a walk on the alternate days.
 
As I get older I notice that my diet often affects everything from my mood to my fatigue level. In the past I didn't pay too much attention to what I ate and was fine but that's changed now. . I am in pretty good shape but on days I I don't eat right I often feel burned out and in a rather dark mood. I am considering going to see a nutritionist to get advice about a proper diet for someone my age. Not sure if that helps any but thought I would throw it out there. And welcome to the forum !
 
The heat wears me down. Sometimes I just lay in bed for 15 or 20 minutes after I wake up because my bedroom is the only room in the house that has AC. Last week, I only mowed the front yard because it was so damn hot. My backyard looks like hell with overgrown grass and little trees growing up all over the place.

It looks like it's finally going to start cooling down this week with highs in the mid-80s.

I have trouble with temperature extremes any more, now that I'm getting old. The heat feels hotter and the cold feels colder.
 
SeniorBen said:
The heat wears me down. Sometimes I just lay in bed for 15 or 20 minutes after I wake up because my bedroom is the only room in the house that has AC. Last week, I only mowed the front yard because it was so damn hot. My backyard looks like hell with little trees growing up all over the place.

It looks like it's finally going to start cooling down this week with highs in the mid-80s.

I have trouble with temperature extremes any more, now that I'm getting old. The heat feels hotter and the cold feels colder.
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Well, don't feel bad about that, I had to start doing the mowing and triming in shifts when I was only in my mid 40's. Now I just step out on the porch, go back in the house, call the son to let him know the grass grew, LOL
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I'll be 70 in 4 months & I hate it; I have to rest after everything.
Up to 60, a typical day was, do laundry, wash the car, exercise on elliptical, lift weights, shoot 400 rounds in competition, go on a date that evening, then more........exercise after the date.
Now, it's "Pick one, then rest."
 
"Oh to be eighteen again, blood pumping through my veins at 1000mph!!" Not on your nelly, I've now got accustomed to a more leisurely, slower pace of life. I can still push a lawn mower over a lawn and watch the wildlife while I do it, in fact, as a thank you for doing the lady from over the street's lawn, she often cooks me a dinner. She is 79 and I'm pushing 85, so come on, NorthernLight, think of something completely daft to do and then do it (it's easy for me 'cause I'm as thick as two short planks), oh yeh....... Welcome to the forum. 🤗 😊
 
I have noticed this in myself also. I have gotten to the point where I have to force myself to leave my apartment. One thing I do know is that my energy level is highest in the morning after I am finished with my coffee. I try to do everything I can during that time that is physical. Later on, I can do more computer things.
 
C'mon all you seventy year olds......you are making me feel depressed for you.
Sure , things have to be taken a little slower but just get your mind around it and tackle head on.

I am about to hit 90 and have had many health problems which have curtailed a lot of activity in my life but my goodness at your ages of 60/70 you still have a LOT of living to do. At this age now I am mainly house bound. So get out there and do it while you can .
Forget about how it used to be.

I would love to be even 80 again when I was involved in volunteer work. I started that in my late 60's . You can always find something to be useful at in that area and meet lots of new people.


So , Northern Light......
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