So only when Whites say the "N" word it's racist

bobcat said:
think it depends on who you're talking to, and the intent matters.
Sometimes there is playful banter among women using the word "bitch". They might say something like "Okay, but this better work bitch". It is just used as sassy banter, and it isn't used in a disrespectful way, but one needs to be very careful that it's clearly understood that way.
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yes exactly - context and intent matters and sometimes groups of people re claim a word that has been used as a derogatory word to then use it with pride about themselves

I admit I dont quite understand that rationale - and since I am not in that group (ie in this case am a white person) then I definitely do not use it myself.
 
Della said:
It's never okay for white people to use it. It's offensive to my ears no matter who says it, but if a group of black people want to use it among themselves, that's their choice. Sort of like my friends and I might call ourselves the happy hags, but if some other person called me a hag I'd hit him with my cane.
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Even though the term is sometimes used among Blacks as a term of endearment or comraderie, I don't think it's okay for anyone to use it ! It's a degrading term that has a disgusting history. Besides it being a slave era derogatory term, it signified that we were considered less than the animals. I try to impart this to young people I hear using the term publicly (when I can). I hate that the term is so pervasive in some music (especially Rap though not all rap).
 

When I was teenager in this town where I live, kids that were Italian American used to call each other the "G" word or the "W" word. If you are Italian American, you know what words I'm talking about. I never liked being called a honky, so I know how offensive sounding the N word would be to people. Living in the North, I've never been called a cracker, which I find offensive.

If one doesn't like to be referred to by certain names or terms, one must realize that people of other ethnic backgrounds feel the same way about certain words or terms. Just avoid using them.
 
OneEyedDiva said:
Even though the term is sometimes used among Blacks as a term of endearment or comraderie, I don't think it's okay for anyone to use it ! It's a degrading term that has a disgusting history. Besides it being a slave era derogatory term, it signified that we were considered less than the animals. I try to impart this to young people I hear using the term publicly (when I can). I hate that the term is so pervasive in some music (especially Rap though not all rap).
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Until Hollywood and the music industry, stop promoting the use of the term, actors and musicians will keep using it. What many don't realize is that it is not used as a term of friendship, but rather a term that signifies dominance. It is like saying, you are my slave, you are my property, you are my bitch, and even if a friend is joking with another and uses the term, it still signifies dominance. It never says I respect you or love you. Comedians use it to get laughs. As long as it makes money for the promotors, it will never stop.

In answer to the OP. IMO, when non Blacks use it, it is out of ignorance or hate and when Blacks use it, it is arrogance and a racial taunting. Look at us, we can use the word and you can't, That just causes hate and division. My husband says that any Blacks that uses the word unnecessarily on film, comedy, or music just to make money, are spitting on the graves of their ancestors that were sold into slavery. They are no better than the Africans that captured other Africans and sold them to the Spanish slave traders.
 
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Growing up in Pinellas County Florida I ws exposed to quite a dichotomy. On the one hand you had your native southerners who were pretty much racists and then your northern transplants who were less so. I was a mister in between as a kid. Two of my best friends, Ken and Larry, were pretty hard core southerners. Ken's family was originally from Fen Holloway Florida and Larry's was from Darlington Florida. If you look them up you will see that these are two barely wide spots in the road in the backwoods of North Florida. And they were both pretty much racists. It wasn't that they were stupid. Ken and Larry werer two of the most intelligent people I ever met. It was their upbring and culture.

On the other hand two of my other friend, Ed and Don, were transplants from up north. Iowa, and Ohio. I don't remember either of them being racist at all. Ken and Larry did not hang out with Ed and Don. But I was kind of in the middle. Sometimes I'd hang out with Ken and Larry and it would be outdoor things like going fishing, gettin drunk, shooting guns etc. And when I was with them I'd go along with the racism too. Use the old N word, laugh at the racist jokes and whatever.

Although I was born in Florida I was the the son of New Jersey transplants and had a Polish surname so I did what I felt I had to to get along with the good old boys. On the other hand when I was hanging out with Ed and Don we did nerdy indoor stuff like making up comedy skits and recording them on Ed's reel to reel tape recorder. So I was kind of a Chameleon.
 
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